Biggest Whopper you've heard from a UA Pilot, Flight Attendant, Gate or Ticket Agent?
May 15, 2012, 4:49 pm
#76
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: DSM
Programs: UA 1K, AA EP, DL PL, HH Dia, Marriott Gld, National Exp
Posts: 721
Not at CLE for me yesterday. From C27 on boarding pass to C19 for departure. Couple weeks ago at ORD, during 40 minutes waiting for late arriving aircraft gate changed from B19 on boarding pass to B9 to B19 back to B9 from where we departed.
May 15, 2012, 5:18 pm
#77
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 102
"... or check with the uniformed agent greeting our flight..."
I've lost track of the number of times - on UA and others - that I've heard the FA's describing the mystical uniformed agent who will be waiting patiently there at the end of the jetway to answer all questions.
May 15, 2012, 5:35 pm
#78
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Luxembourg
Programs: KLM/AF Platinum for life, IHG Platinum, Accor Platinum
Posts: 1,026
Embraer service. Door still open and pilot has announce that the de-ice truck will be back by for us in about 45min. People take out mobile phones to call home about the delay and the FA says to one guy "Sir, you can't use your phone, it is dangerous. You are sitting right over the fuel tank" 
I coulda put out that fire from pissing myself laughing.
I coulda put out that fire from pissing myself laughing.
May 15, 2012, 6:55 pm
#79
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: SFO/JFK/MGA
Programs: UA 1P MM, AA-PP, AS, DL, HH G, SPG Gold, TA nada
Posts: 2,043
Really? My last JFK-SFO went from Gate 7 to 10 and back to 7 in a matter of 30 minutes. IAH went from Gate C19 to E20 in a matter of 30 minutes before departure all the while I was in immigration line (a total nightmare at IAH). Stupidly I didn't look at monitor after spending 1:15 in line and re-clearing security. Did get my first ride on the Caaaarrrrt.
May 15, 2012, 7:07 pm
#80
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: NYC
Programs: AA EXP, UA Platinum, Alaksa MVP 75K, Air Berlin Gold, HHonors Diamond, Marriott Gold, Hertz PC
Posts: 2,389
Really? My last JFK-SFO went from Gate 7 to 10 and back to 7 in a matter of 30 minutes. IAH went from Gate C19 to E20 in a matter of 30 minutes before departure all the while I was in immigration line (a total nightmare at IAH). Stupidly I didn't look at monitor after spending 1:15 in line and re-clearing security. Did get my first ride on the Caaaarrrrt.
May 15, 2012, 7:14 pm
#81
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: SFO/JFK/MGA
Programs: UA 1P MM, AA-PP, AS, DL, HH G, SPG Gold, TA nada
Posts: 2,043
True, JFK is a piece of cake. I was in the lounge and the constant texts re: gate changes and time were driving me crazy
May 15, 2012, 11:38 pm
#82
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: LAS
Programs: UA Platinum, 1M, HH Diamond
Posts: 121
CLE Redeye From LAS - always there
I'd agree it's usually not the case, but I had to start flying pmCO when pmUA started taking away all of my redeye options from LAS. I'd guess it was about 15 for 15 that an agent was waiting to answer questions upon landing in CLE.
May 16, 2012, 1:21 am
#83
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: SJC/SFO
Programs: WN A+ CP, UA 1MM/*A Gold, Mar LT Tit, IHG Plat, HH Dia
Posts: 6,284
+1. FAs promise this virtually every time a flight has arrived late, and I don't think I have ever seen an agent waiting to help in the gate area.
May 16, 2012, 7:38 am
#84
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 348
Do you breeze right past the counter or podium? I would say 99% of the time an agent is standing there. An agent can't (isn't supposed to) open a jetway door and then disappear.
May 16, 2012, 9:42 am
#85
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: SEA
Programs: AS MVP Gold75K
Posts: 850
May 16, 2012, 11:31 am
#86
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: DEN
Programs: Recovering after 7 years of UA 1K, Still UA Silver (Which means nothing), Marriott Lifetime Plat Pre
Posts: 1,950
Upon taxiing to the runway in LGA on an LGA-DEN flight the plane stopped (as it often does during the 1 hour taxi) and the captain announced that their cell phone detection indicator showed that there were still 5 cell phones turned on and that they need to be turned off immediately. At the next stop he announced that there were still 3 cell phones turned on and that we could not take off until his detector indicated that all cell phones were off.
May 16, 2012, 12:10 pm
#87
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: san francisco
Programs: No airline status whatsoever, Chase URs, HHonors Diamond, IHG Platinum
Posts: 567
I'm with FlavorFave - let's start a thread of UA/CO passengers' biggest whoppers! Hopefully this ALL will be read and enjoyed as entertainment and nobody's feelings will be hurt.
May 16, 2012, 12:15 pm
#88
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: SJC, SFO, YYC
Programs: AA-EXP, AA-0.41MM, UA-Gold, Ex UA-1K (2006 thru 2015), PMUA-0.95MM, COUA-1.5MM-lite, AF-Silver
Posts: 13,437
With United, it has been the case for years that the counter is staffed only during pre-boarding (and in some stations like COS, rarely), and shortly before boarding the action moves to the podium. Arriving pax have nothing.
It is called cost cutting.
May 16, 2012, 12:36 pm
#89
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: UK
Programs: Hilton HHonors Diamond,Bonvoy Platinum,Shangri-La Golden Circle Jade,LH SEN,AZ Gold,VS Elevate Gold
Posts: 134
May 16, 2012, 1:29 pm
#90
Join Date: Aug 2010
Programs: UA 1k,Hilton Diamond,Hyatt Platinum
Posts: 3
A few years back...
FA is doing the safety announcements and adds in the following ad-libs...
"For those people who have not been in a car in the last 30 years and seen a seat belt, here's how to put one on"
and (following the first part of the life vest verbiage)
"In case you thought ahead to bring a book as you were exiting the plane and jumping into the water, there is a light attached for you to read as it gets dark"
"For those people who have not been in a car in the last 30 years and seen a seat belt, here's how to put one on"
and (following the first part of the life vest verbiage)
"In case you thought ahead to bring a book as you were exiting the plane and jumping into the water, there is a light attached for you to read as it gets dark"