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Biggest Whopper you've heard from a UA Pilot, Flight Attendant, Gate or Ticket Agent?

Biggest Whopper you've heard from a UA Pilot, Flight Attendant, Gate or Ticket Agent?

Old Jul 18, 16, 9:20 pm
  #496  
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Originally Posted by physioprof View Post
Either way, I wouldn't consider it a "whopper". More likely to be a slip of the tongue.
Considering some whoppers I've heard, I'd chalk that one up to old habits die hard.
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Old Jul 18, 16, 11:30 pm
  #497  
 
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I wish I had a nickel for every time I said to myself before I keyed the PA mic switch, "What's the chance that anybody's going to believe what I'm going to say".

FAB
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Old Jul 19, 16, 10:34 am
  #498  
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Originally Posted by freshairborne View Post
I wish I had a nickel for every time I said to myself before I keyed the PA mic switch, "What's the chance that anybody's going to believe what I'm going to say".

FAB
www.instantrimshot.com

Thanks for the chuckle. FAB!
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Old Jul 19, 16, 2:22 pm
  #499  
 
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Originally Posted by freshairborne View Post
I wish I had a nickel for every time I said to myself before I keyed the PA mic switch, "What's the chance that anybody's going to believe what I'm going to say".

FAB
LOL OK, now I am curious.

What was the least believable...yet totally valid...thing you have had to announce?
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Old Jul 19, 16, 3:04 pm
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Originally Posted by goodeats21 View Post
LOL OK, now I am curious.

What was the least believable...yet totally valid...thing you have had to announce?
I'll bite...

In BCN or MAD (don't remember). A bird strike on landing shattered the glass of the nose gear light, causing shards of glass to be exposed along with a few small pieces of bird. Discovered this on the preflight walk around.

Should be a quick fix, call Iberia have their mx clean off the broken glass so we can continue to the US. Ends up this particular lens was not differable, still not a big deal, 5 or 6 screws and a replacement lens. However, the "gatekeeper" of the parts department was currently running a 15k race in the city and unreachable. No one else had the authority to release the part at Iberia for us.

Three hours later we get word the guy finished the race and gave the thumbs up. 10 minutes after the part arrived it was installed and we were on our way.

True story...
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Old Jul 19, 16, 3:39 pm
  #501  
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Originally Posted by clubord View Post

True story...
Thanks, nice anecdote.

As (fictional) Sherlock Holmes said:

Truth if far stranger than fiction.
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Old Jul 19, 16, 11:27 pm
  #502  
 
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Originally Posted by goodeats21 View Post
LOL OK, now I am curious.

What was the least believable...yet totally valid...thing you have had to announce?
Here's one; many more though: After a lengthy maintenance delay, we were just about to get the door shut but the gate agent told us there were a couple of late connecting passengers that would make the flight since we were delayed. They happened to be high-status passengers (which means little to me because all of my passengers are high-status in my book). They boarded and we were off. I made the PA as they boarded that our maintenance issue was resolved. As I stood at the cockpit door and thanked the passengers after we landed, several folks gave me the hairy eyeball and insinuated that I didn't really have a maintenance problem; I'd made that up in order to hold the flight for the passengers.

But one of so many scenarios that are viewed with skepticism when I'm really just trying to get everyone where they want to go as safely and comfortably as possible.

I got a little stink-eye for landing in DEN 20 minutes late tonight. People have no clue what dealing with nasty weather is like in front of the cockpit door.

3 more years....

FAB
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Old Jul 20, 16, 1:36 am
  #503  
 
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Originally Posted by clubord View Post
I'll bite...

In BCN or MAD (don't remember). A bird strike on landing shattered the glass of the nose gear light, causing shards of glass to be exposed along with a few small pieces of bird. Discovered this on the preflight walk around.

Should be a quick fix, call Iberia have their mx clean off the broken glass so we can continue to the US. Ends up this particular lens was not differable, still not a big deal, 5 or 6 screws and a replacement lens. However, the "gatekeeper" of the parts department was currently running a 15k race in the city and unreachable. No one else had the authority to release the part at Iberia for us.

Three hours later we get word the guy finished the race and gave the thumbs up. 10 minutes after the part arrived it was installed and we were on our way.

True story...
Slow runner. Even if he had just started, he'd be averaging about 3 miles/hr (perhaps they didn't contact him right away at the finish, but even if it took an hour to get ahold of him, 4.5 miles/hr is still pretty dang slow.)
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Old Jul 20, 16, 4:42 am
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Originally Posted by clubord View Post
I'll bite...

In BCN or MAD (don't remember). A bird strike on landing shattered the glass of the nose gear light, causing shards of glass to be exposed along with a few small pieces of bird. Discovered this on the preflight walk around.
...
True story...
Originally Posted by freshairborne View Post
Here's one; many more though: After a lengthy maintenance delay, we were just about to get the door shut but the gate agent told us there were a couple of late connecting passengers that would make the flight since we were delayed. .
...
3 more years....

FAB
Thanks for sharing the stories. Really interesting to hear things from another perspective. The longer I have been traipsing about the world in the air, the more intrigued I become with the nuances of airline ops.

Thanks for keeping things safe, regardless of how incredulous some passengers take the news.
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Old Jul 20, 16, 7:32 am
  #505  
 
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Originally Posted by fastair View Post
Slow runner. Even if he had just started, he'd be averaging about 3 miles/hr (perhaps they didn't contact him right away at the finish, but even if it took an hour to get ahold of him, 4.5 miles/hr is still pretty dang slow.)
To be fair, I usually check my phone at bag check rather than run with the phone.
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Old Jul 20, 16, 8:37 am
  #506  
 
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Not UA, but many years ago on a SWA flight we landed (and bounced) so hard coming into Midway that I was shocked the gear didn't protrude into the top of the wing. Pilot blamed Autoland, which if I understand correctly, isn't possible at Midway.
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Old Jul 20, 16, 9:08 am
  #507  
 
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This morning LAX-DEN delayed 90 minutes, you incoming aircraft is late

I check and the flight from BWI is actually early, UAL decided to switch aircraft for a 820 departure to a plane that would not arrive LAX until 920

Amazing!!
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Old Jul 20, 16, 9:38 am
  #508  
 
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Originally Posted by COSPILOT View Post
Not UA, but many years ago on a SWA flight we landed (and bounced) so hard coming into Midway that I was shocked the gear didn't protrude into the top of the wing. Pilot blamed Autoland, which if I understand correctly, isn't possible at Midway.
I had a similar landing once on EA. FA said, "Welcome to LaGuardia! And Welcome to LaGuardia again!"
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Old Jul 20, 16, 9:51 am
  #509  
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Rumors swirling of UA returning to JFK due to:

a) the DL deal fell through
b) Oscar is in charge
c) wishful thinking
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Old Jul 20, 16, 9:53 am
  #510  
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Originally Posted by wxguy View Post
I had a similar landing once on EA. FA said, "Welcome to LaGuardia! And Welcome to LaGuardia again!"
"please remain seated while Captain Kangaroo taxis us safely to the gate"
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