Crazy for family to ask me and my small child to go back to the UK?
 

I'm a UK citizen and green card holder. Family issues in the UK are prompting me to think about going back to the UK from the north central US over the next two weeks to be with my grandparents. I would probably stay a month but plan like I couldn't come back into the US until next year. I can work remotely fine and I would need to take my toddler (dual citizen). I can also easily self quarantine outside of Exeter. I'm interested in opinions on whether or not you think it's a good idea to go or not? How easy has it to travel with small children internationally? I am thinking about driving down to DFW and flying to LHR and renting a car to get to Exeter.

It is a tough decision, I had similar challenges regarding illness in m family in the UK in March

I don't think its unreasonable for people to ask you to return, however the should respect whatever decision you come to.

As well as the health implications, you need to consider the tax implications if you end up living and working n the UK for more than 90 days in any one tax year,

my own experience is that the travel itself will be OK. The quarantine on arrival in the UK would mean you would, in theory, mean you could not meet with family members for a period of time and this would potentially be a bigger challenge, especially for your child.

I don't think anyone can answer your questions as we do not know the circumstances. Flying back to the UK should not be too complex, though bear in mind you'll need to fully isolate yourself for 2 weeks (including from the family) before you can proceed to do anything else. What I think would not be reasonable is to go with an expectation to easily return to the US soon afterwards. The uncertainty is high and you need to be prepared (but seem to be) to potentially stay in the UK for a long time if you decide to cross the Atlantic.

Many of us are facing similarly heart breaking decisions if it makes you feel any better. One always hopes to be able to resume some normalcy at some point, but the default assumption for now is that this may not be possible for quite a while and till it is, we may have to make hard choices in terms of our personal (and professional) lives that tie us for several weeks or months.

If you're from the NC US why would you drive down to Dallas to fly to London?

How well do you think your toddler would handle the 2 weeks quarentine which means (unless you have acess to a private garden) having to stay inside.

I'm about equal distance drive from Chicago and DFW. And thought leaving my car with a friend in DFW was a better option and had more space in the airport. I do like how ORD has the two flights, AA and BA.

Thank you both for the support. Not many of my friends and neighbors understand the situation that I am in. Also, thank you for bringing up the tax situation, normally my firm would take care of that but they would not for a personal trip.

I totally understand, I am from the UK and live in Canada. My parents are elderly, and father has alzheimers, mother is struggling to cope with him. The temptation to go visit is strong, but quarantine is two weeks on either end, so I am letting my UK based brother handle things, even though I have more free time than he.

I do not think anyone can decide for you, but just wanted to say I empathise.

I have gone back to the UK at various points when my kids were tiny, they always handled the travel well. They are usually happy as long as you are with them. I hope your decision becomes clearer.

I could be in this situation any day ( apart from the sick child). If I had to make the trip, then I would not be observing 2 weeks quarantine from the family members I was going to see. I would be tested before travelling of course, and would not visit anywhere else other than my parents home - their sickness would be the reason for the trip.

It is very difficult. When my father was ill and the borders here were closed I initially had a mixed response from friends and relatives in the UK when I decided not to travel to the UK. In time I believe they all came to understand and respect the decision I made.

Stay in USA until they have a treatment or vaccine imho. But only you can decide.

An alternative view is that the upcoming US election and likely oddness makes the UK a more appealing place to be.

I was discussing this (sans the child) with my OH and her elderly parents in South Africa. We’ve decided for her to go back over Xmas and NY even with the UK quarantine on return as she misses them terribly and there is no certainty at all when she might be able to visit again. We both think it is one of those things she will only regret is she doesn’t do it.

While my flying experience has all been short haul, it’s felt perfectly safe and do-able. I imagine trans Atlantic flights will be very quiet, perversely making the travel easier than the normal world!

Will you have UK national health insurance coverage while there? If not, check whether your policy (presumably as an employee benefit) covers you on a personal trip abroad of this length. A lot of USA managed care policies do not. Note that your child is likely to need routine medical care such as shots if you're away for three months or more, although you might be able to plan around this somewhat before leaving.

If your child currently goes to preschool etc., not doing so could be a big adjustment if there's no similar program available in your location in the UK.

When you say north central USA, how bad is COVID-19 where you are? I'm guessing Iowa or Missouri (but I'm not sure the latter would be north central), based on equidistant from ORD and DFW, although at first I was thinking WI, MN, ND, SD, etc. which are places where either infection is raging or is expected to get much worse in the next week or two.

If the goal is a nonstop to LHR, there might be additional airports if you don't necessarily insist on Oneworld.....or you could consider connections if the schedule is good.

Just a few comments:

1. Don't worry too much about the tax situation until you spend more than 183 days (in a year) in the UK. At that point you become an automatic tax resident. At less than 90 days you are automatically non tax resident. In between it is quite a difficult process to determine tax residency but if it is a 'once off' >90 days stay, it is likely that you wont be a tax resident. (I am not a tax expert, but I have been 'in the same boat')
2. As a UK citizen you should have NHS coverage when you are in the UK. But of course you would have to register for that at a local GP practise (unless in case of emergency)
3. Quarantine: Yes, you will have to self isolate. You can do this in a separate room in your family's house (as far as I understand).

Yes it is entirely unreasonable for your family in the UK to demand you uproot yourself and your young child to care for your grandparents. Is there some reason they are shoveling the responsibility on to you when they are already in the UK? It seems quite clear you are not in favour of going and should not be guilted into it by family.