Clint Bint

I'd much rather watch Stansted - Britain's Crappiest Airport.
I had the misfortune to pass through it last week for the first time in ages and I hadn't realised how bad it has become.

lhrsfo

I'd second that. Quite the most horrible airport I think I've ever visited.

Clint Bint

I agree and I've used the old Athens airport !
Not enough seats or toilets meant queues for everything once you'd trudged through the mile and a half of retail with the rest of the despairing humanity.
I won't be using that place again.

farci

I used STN for the first time in a long time and agree with all the above. At least they've now got a half decent lounge in departures - if you can find it!

Mizter T

There are lots of seats and un-busy toilets in the piers, so if you can head to your gate ASAP you'll find somewhere much less manic to sit compared to the main departure lounge. Of course that depends on your gate being announced. There is (or was) also a slightly hidden corner of the main departure lounge with some seats on the route to the eastern-most pier (the one which you walk to rather than take the transit train).

flatlander

Gates are never, in my experience, announced more than 45 minutes before departure - so by the time you get to the gate you've only got a few minutes before a typical flight begins boarding. Unless you're leaving from the gates in the 80-90 range when you can sit down for 15 mins or so before boarding begins - but those are the worst gates in the airport and scarcely better than the main scrum. (I don't fly Ryanair on principle so I can't comment on the 30-40 gates).

I fly from Stansted several times a month and have done for nearly a decade, and I hate the place now. MAG have made it entirely horrible.

The lounge is well overpriced for what it is - if it included enough food to have a meal I might be interested, but it doesn't. It's also not near the path to the gates.

STN survival hints:

Arrive T-70min or so. Any earlier and you'll just be spending time in the departure cattle pen and hate your life even more. Don't reckon on being able to sit down anywhere comfortable to eat, the eating places are all full of people who can't find a seat in the non-rent-generating seating area, so buy takeaway food to eat on the aircraft.

Buy Fast Track. Since 15 minutes security line is a target not a maximum at this airport, you need fast track. The FT is actually Fast. Don't join the ordinary security queue, you'll hate your life even more.

Walk through the shops as fast as possible, practice your best "EXCUSE ME" at the people who dither and stop in the main thoroughfare. These people will make you hate your life even more.

Best sandwich option: Pret or Itsu.
Best cold other dish option: Itsu, then Pret.
Best hot option to go: LEON hot box.
Cheapest, easiest bottle of water: Itsu (or the shop by the gates)

You should, with this, be in the departure area with your food item purchased (if desired) as the gate is announced. Go to the gate immediately to escape the scrum. You will hate your life a bit less the less time you spend in that departure hall.

Secret option 2: drive to London City, it's half an hour (outside rush hour) longer but half an hour shorter to get through the airport and you'll hate the world a lot less.

MAG, the chiselling tosspots, have ruined Stansted airport.

Here's a diagram of the problem. Grey is seating area, colours is space rented out for retail.

http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/attac...1&d=1464089871

VivoPerLei

Wow! I haven't flown out of Stansted in several years so was wondering what the issue was. I'll quit complaining about Gatwick North.

By the way, it looks like they've turned the airport into CandyLand

stut

I love how the end of the maze is marked "ESCAPE".

Clint Bint

It reminded me of one of those Disney trails where you wind around and around but never actually go anywhere.
When it opened I liked Stansted - it's not as easy or as cheap to get to as LHR or LGW but the airport took the edge of this - but my most recent visit,the first since it was taken over and transformed into a commando retail trail,has put me off for good.
Lord knows what it would be like at the height of the summer holiday season.

VivoPerLei

When I was living in Cambridge (late 90's/early 00's) Stansted was a dream. Lufthansa had nice schedules to Frankfurt which meant I didn't have to make the hike down to Heathrow every week. Now it's the place I have to go at 2330 to pick up my budget flying relatives

flatlander

It's a trap. That's the lounge but you can't escape that way, the gates are back towards the scrum from the lounge and off the top of the map.

It is awful.

Swanhunter

I hate LGW South but STN sounds 10 times worse.

stut

At least LGW South, like Ikea, has a short-cut if you know where to look.

VivoPerLei

LGW South also has the 'Clubrooms'. Very nice lounge

gnarly

From where to where?
I'm intrigued.