roadwarrier

Agreed!!!!

For a "Vodka Virgin" you seemed to have managed quite well.

cockpitvisit

I thought you couldn't top the return flight to Polyarny, but you just did with the new installment! Amazing report! I hope the next installment will appear soon, otherwise I would have to start drinking vodka out of frustration

Pseudo Nim

Never drink vodka out of frustration. That's straight up alcoholism. Rather, you need to have a good reason to do it, such as the presence of good friends, and new friendships formed, and relationships forged that will withstand distances and opinion differences.

jlisi984

—Please excuse the delay in posting this segment of the trip report, as P and I were debating how to best portray this flight. We are indebted to the crew for the incredible experience, and thankful for their generosity and kindness. Due to the open nature of the internet and its reach, we do not feel comfortable posting the full flight experience on a public forum. Instead of censoring for all, for those who are curious to read what transpired, please send me a PM, and I will share the missing section privately. We know this goes against the spirit of sharing on FlyerTalk, but this was no ordinary flight. Thank you for your understanding.—





After our exhilarating journey to the airport, we arrived in good spirits and exchanged our formal good-byes with X at the car. Passing the security controls once more, we entered the terminal 28 minutes prior to scheduled departure. After the multitude of assurances by X that we would make it, and trusting Russian promises, we were not even slightly surprised by the lack of activity at the checkin desks. X disappears into an office for a moment, some phone calls are made, and boarding passes are printed. We are also informed that not only would we be flying on the Tu-154, but our pilot would be Andrey, arguably the most famous Tu-154 commander, who had landed “Izhma”. This aircraft had last flown in January, and in May only flew two round-trips to Novosibirsk, therefore we were somewhat doubtful that the promised schedule would materialize, and confirmation that our plans had come to bear fruit was welcome.

I managed to sneak in a few shots of the terminal inside, which had some unique decorative details, but had to be particularly careful due to two obvious plain-clothes policemen on duty.





As I have mentioned before, the endless and unknown hallways of Soviet airports are fascinating.



At this point, the copious intake of liquids got to P, and he disappeared to the toilet (though he claims he was talking with the airport manager), which unnerved poor M, so I suggested that we proceed through security. The control was the same as usual, and we were through only in time to see boarding commence, 10 minutes after our arrival at the airport.



One notable difference in the departure hall between the departure earlier in the day to Polyarny and this one to Novosibirsk was that the lights had been turned on for this premium flight.



The same bus and journey, the same photography guards and cautious photography under their noses, repeated itself for the fourth time in the span of a few hours.

Pulling up to the Tu-154, we were elated. The Tu-134 was amazing, without a doubt, but somehow as a regional jet it didn’t have the same meaning nor heft as a mainline aircraft. A unique feature is the boarding process, which takes place at the second door, immediately adjacent to the wing, and nearly in the middle of the aircraft - imagine an Airbus A321 being boarded by the L2 door.



The upper lip of the entry door was just a touch more comfortably positioned than on the Yak-42, and after entering we turned right and headed to the rear of the aircraft. The Tu-154 has an unusual setup, with two economy sections divided by the main galley, and business at the very front.





While the Tu-134 we had flown on earlier in the day lost much of its Soviet glamour due to a rather inconsiderate retrofit, here the original charm had been preserved. The panelling was beige with brown streaks, the bins yellowed and small, the seat lettering original. The overhead panels still said “Stewardess”, and pressing the button would illuminate a light big enough to embarrass the person brave or foolish enough to have pressed it in the first place.























The right rear emergency exit, which has an ingenious position to begin with - behind the engine intake, in the space between the fuselage and the cowling - was labeled with a прав (right), written in blue felt pen. The door looked battered, like a Lada after visiting the village mechanic. This was a true Soviet classic.



Immediately behind us were the two lavatories, complete with linen towels and a bar of soap, positioned against the rear bulkhead on both sides of flight attendant jump seats.



We had the entire rear section of the aircraft to ourselves, and we immediately made friends with the young, friendly flight attendant with Asiatic features. She was equally enthusiastic about the Tupolev-154, and said we could take pictures of whatever we wanted.

After the safety demonstration was complete, I was approached by an older flight attendant, also with Asiatic features, who took out the safety card and reprimanded me for taking pictures. Having learned long ago that flight attendants frequently have strained relationships between themselves, I stayed mum and simply agreed. But our friendly younger flight attendant witnessed the exchange, and after a few words were exchanged, the older lady returned, apologized (!) and said I could take pictures of everything. This was going to be a good flight.

We pushed back, and a magical image presented itself - the Tu-134 we had just flown on from the window of a Tu-154. As a reminder, this is 2019.



The light provided for some great opportunities to capture the Soloviev engine in the sun.



…as well as portrait lighting for capturing P. He later told me that he hated this picture, which surprised me, as I thought he looked quite good. “Ah, yes, you know, I usually don’t like pictures of myself… though I like this one. But I realized that’s after three bottles of vodka and onboard a Soviet airliner.” Sometimes, the recipe for happiness is somewhat complex.



Of course P and I quickly lowered all the seats in front of us, giving us plenty of breathing space, not much different to an open traditional First Class cabin. M, however, would quickly start lifting the chairs in his vicinity, so we would be lowering and lifting, as both sides were persistent in their desires.



P and I decided the seats could actually form a lie-flat bed, and went about testing our theory. Sure enough, with three seats folded down, we could lie down flat, and a couple of blankets would have solved the issue of the unpleasant metal seat-backs forming the base of our bed.





Then, a few moments were spent perusing the inflight magazine - while M was rather vegetative, nothing can slow P and I down.



Once we had been satisfied by the intriguing content of the magazine, we then embarked on a quest to find safety cards. I had preempted P and quickly found both a new and old version copy, but when P started searching, there were no “old” versions to be found. Eventually he would solve this problem, but not before the meal arrived.





The folding seat-backs are ingenious - even when the seat in front of you is folded flat, the tray table can still be lifted to its regular position.

Our diamond-studded meal, served as always in a box with individually packaged containers.





The cabin mid-flight:



—this section of the story has been redacted—

Once all the passengers were off, we were allowed back to the last rows to fetch our bags, and P blatantly resumed his search for an “old-style” safety card - eventually being helped by four flight attendants, while the entire bus of passengers waited for us. With success achieved only by raiding the flight attendants safety demonstration kit, we disembarked, still in awe of the entire journey.

cockpitvisit

Thanks for the great report!

I am curious, what was the build year of this Tu-154? While it is looking very Soviet, I thought the Tu-154M only entered service after the end of the glorious USSR, but I may be wrong here.

Were lids on hand luggage bins retrofitted, or are they the original design? I thought Soviet airplanes just had open shelves...

jlisi984

1992 build. So tail end of USSR era... I believe the bins in this case were original as well.

Pseudo Nim

RabbitIYH

This TR has been absolutely amazing! Thank you so much for sharing it with us!

cedric

What a tease!!!!

rdurlabhji

This reads like Paul Theroux, what an incredible TR.

24left

@jlisi984

I just stumbled upon this epic trip report. Outstanding and thank you so much.