FlyerTalk Forums - Passover on Princess

Through Charlotte to Toronto

Hunnybear was on a month-long secret mission to Lansing, Mich., so I booked a ticket on US Airways to rendezvous with her in Toronto for Passover and continue to Ft. Lauderdale for a repeat cruise on Grand Princess thanks to a great offer from Cruise-4-Miles. Prices for the LA-Toronto-Ft. Lauderdale-LA circle trip varied wildly by on-line vendor. American Express Travel, formerly www.itn.net, had the best two-week advance-purchase fare at under $700 so I bought it with minutes to spare before midnight Pacific Time, dialing up from our Piazza Suite at the Venetian hotel in Las Vegas. I called US Airways the next morning and had no trouble using systemwides to confirm upgrades on the long segments. I would have to call back a couple days before flight time to upgrade the remaining leg with 800-mile upgrades so I made a note in my Outlook calendar.

My green-and-white Independent Taxi arrived right on time and the Russian driver dropped me at Terminal 1. I paid the fare, including a generous tip, and then stood in the First Class/Dividend Preferred line waiting for service. The regular coach line was moving faster but after less than five minutes I got checked in by a smiling agent who offered me my choice of upgrade methodologies. I stuck with the original plan and used a systemwide, not having enough 800-milers to use them.

I breezed through security and headed for the US Airways Club where I schmoozed my way in on the pretext that Canada was an international destination. The agent wasn’t sure but we agreed it was a gray area and she let me in. I spent 15 minutes trying unsuccessfully to dial up from one of the carrels before realizing the instructions said at the very bottom that for dataport calls, but not regular calls, you had to dial 9. By the time I got on line it was time to head to the gate so I gulped my black coffee, packed up, and plowed through the hordes of Southwest customers to gate 12 for my first leg to Charlotte, N.C.

We boarded on time and I settled into seat 1C, US Airways’ version of United’s 1B, where I like to sit because I can exert maximum control over the cabin crew. We had two rounds of preflight drinks, I ordering a bottle of water and a Diet Coke and my seat opponent ordering a morning Jack Daniels on the rocks. Throughout the flight he cycled between drinking Jack Daniels and snoozing. We took off on time over the ocean and made a U-Turn towards Charlotte. The stewardess handed out menus and headsets. We started with a small portion of yummy smoked salmon and a salad with Caesar dressing. Next I ordered the peppercorn filet, which came out medium and very edible. I asked for a glass of cabernet but they had only boarded hated merlot on this flight so I asked for and received some Sutter Home cab from the back of the bus. As a rule I don’t eat dessert so I passed on the offered sundae.

The movie was Discovering Forrester, an engaging Sean Connery drama about the friendship between an older white man and a 16-year-old black boy who has to make the difficult decision whether to pursue a career as a pro basketball player or a Pulitzer-winning author. It was exactly the kind of movie I like to see on an airplane: a good new release I haven’t seen yet. After the movie they showed a good episode of Friends. When the hated Bunting’s Windows on Computers came on I flipped my headset off and started to read Tuesdays with Morrie, a gift from my host at MGM Grand. Before I knew it we were landing on time in Charlotte.

When the door opened I called Jeffrey to tell him I was in his home town. It turned out he was there too but with traffic and my short connection, he said, it would be impossible to meet me. So I made a few cell-phone calls and moments later felt a tap on my shoulder. Jeffrey, out of breath, had zoomed to the airport and run to my gate! I gave him a passionate belly hug hello and we caught up in the ten minutes or so left until boarding. He pointed out the window to the ramp. “Is that your plane?” he asked. “Yes.” “That’s one of the ones they didn’t bother to paint blue,” said Jeffrey, a many-years Chairman’s Preferred and one of US Airways’ best customers. “We call them ‘Old Betsy,’ ” he said.

It wasn’t long until I gave Jeffrey a passionate belly hug goodbye and boarded Old Betsy. The overhead bins looked antique but thankfully they had installed new seats, which were comfortable although they had minimal recline. Once again I had seat 1C. This time my seatmate was a very cute 19-year-old blonde going home to Toronto who spent the whole flight reading New Yorker with the light off. I offered to turn her on but she declined.

I passed on the cold snack, an assortment of cheese and crackers, a wedge of ham and cheese on foccacia, and a slice of cheesecake. “It’s all fattening,” I told the slender stewardess. She leaned over and whispered to me conspiratorially: “You know, on the Atkins diet you can eat cheesecake—if you don’t eat the graham-cracker crust!” I resisted the temptation to tell her what I thought about thin people who gave fat people advice on how to lose weight and instead mumbled that I ought to try that Atkins diet some time real soon.

I had another bottle of water and finished Tuesdays with Morrie just before we landed on time in Toronto. I was first through immigration and got only two easy questions from the officer, nothing involving the Prime Minister, and soon my whale came off the carousel, belly full of clothes for the weeklong cruise.

Hunnybear’s Northwest flight was delayed in Detroit, where she was experiencing typical horrible Northwest customer service, so I cleared customs without a word and walked over to the Sheraton Gateway to check in. Last time we were here we got a large minisuite but this time we just got a regular room on the Club Floor. A sign reassured me that phone access charges (at least for the first 60 minutes of each call) were waived on the Club Floor so I dialed up with impunity after ordering a Reuben sandwich and a bottle of Chianti. Finally Hunnybear arrived and we reunited and it felt so good.

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I hope you enjoy my Lion Tales. For photos, past travelogues, subscriptions, and more, see www.liontales.com