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Sundae bloody Sundaes...a 2014 United Year in Review

Sundae bloody Sundaes...a 2014 United Year in Review

Old Jan 15, 15, 6:26 pm
  #1  
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Sundae bloody Sundaes...a 2014 United Year in Review

So now that I've done the real year in review, it's time to explore what many people consider the best part of the United international experience. Given just how much below industry standards United's food and drink generally are, people often wonder if it's worth it. Lots of folks think the best part of the United international experience is the ice cream sundae cart.

If you'd like to check out my other trip reports first:

I. London to Iran and Afghanistan in a mix of C, F, and LCCs
II. Above the Arctic Circle with UA/CO/LH and SK in whY, C, and F
III. Around the World in 40 Days for 40 Years
IV. 8 Places People Who Are Right in the Head Do Not Spend New Years
V. 12 Countries, 10 Airlines, 4 Islands, 27,080 miles, 11 Days
VI. 6 Countries in 6 Days - Caribbean Island Hopping and first AA Experience
VII. Guyana, Suriname, and French Guyana with an unexpected sidetrip to Caracas!
VIII. To Hati - for vacation and a milage run!
IX. Around Senegal and West Africa
X. 4th Annual New Years in Dangerous Places - Libya Edition
XI. Kosovo and FYR Macedonia - Milage Run in United Business + TK/LH
XII. Washington to Peru and Machu Picchu on COPA and TACA
XIII. To Johannesburg...for 36 hours!
XIV. Here a Stan, there a Stan, everwhere a Stan Stan....
XV. Air Burkina, Air Cote d'Ivoire and 7 countries in West Africa
XVI. Turkey for Thanksgiving....with a side of Tajikistan, Serbia, Montenegro, and Moscow
XVII. Into the Heart of Darkness... Congo, Angola, Gabon, OH MY!
XVIII. HI! Four Islands, Lots of Planes, Beaches, and Convertibles
XIX. Plenty of Salt, Not Enough Oxygen...a Trip to Boliva, Colombia, and Ecuador
XX. Learning to Relax - Long Weekend in St Christopher and Nevis
XXI. You're spending New Years WHERE? IRAQ? (2009-2010)
XXII. Pineapples, croissants, and neon OH MY! A trip to Hawaii, Paris, Andorra, and Vegas
XXIII. South Pacific, Israel, Lebanon - 6 weeks - 71,500 miles - 24 countries

So the sundaes...are they anything special? Absolutely not. But hey, who doesn't like ice cream? So, I present, the 2014 United Airlines Ice Cream Year in Review!

January - Lisbon, Portugal to Newark This was ice cream soup with a bit of caramel and a few drowning cherries. Really rather sad. The crew even stole all the stems from the cherries.



February - Houston to Honolulu - this was an odd one. The ice cream was rock hard, but part of it was completely soupy. Caramel again.



February - Honolulu to Washington Dulles - what's that, caramel AGAIN? ...and LOTS of caramel. Just three cherries again though (this must be the United standard) but perfectly lined up in a row:



August - San Francisco to Honolulu - alert Jeff, we're missing a cherry! Only two today, but for some reason I decided variety is the spice of life and switched to hot fudge instead.



August - Honolulu to Washington Dulles - Whew. Back to three cherries and caramel. I was getting concerned.



August - Washington Dulles to Paris - whoah, what's this. Caramel AND chocolate...and only two cherries. Yet, much of the ice cream has no topping at all!



August - Paris to San Francisco - swimming in a sea of caramel and chocolate is one lonely cherry. Apparently there's a cherry shortage in.Paris.



August - San Francisco to Honolulu.- just chocolate...and one cherry. The Shortage might be a San Francisco thing. Lots of chocolate, but very little ice cream.



August - San Francisco to Honolulu.- same flight, but I decided to experiment. I've never had the strawberry topping, so decided .to see what it was about. Apparently not about cherries, because there were none in sight.



October - Tokyo to Singapore - whoah, what's this ceramic thing? You can't serve ice cream in that. Plus, what's that white stuff...I don't "do" whipped cream. Hmmm....pretty sure I still ate it



November -.Frankfurt to Dulles - ice cream soup again...caramel and chocolate, but segregation was in full effect, plus the three neutered cherries.



November - Newark to Tel Aviv - whoah, seriously? I struggle all year to get my three cherries I'm due on my sundaes and then you go all wild and give me 10? I mean come on...that's a lot of caramel and cherries!



December - Zurich to Newark - four cherries and caramel. I have a theory. It's year-end. United bought too many cherries and is now desperately trying to get rid of them.



December - Dulles to Amsterdam - well that was short-lived. Back to chocolate and only two cherries. So disappointing.



December - Frankfurt to Dulles - if it's December, it much be two cherries.



2014 summary: I ate lots of ice cream. I got fat. It was anywhere from soupy to rock hard. I tend to switch from caramel to chocolate, but occasionally go wild and have some strawberries. What does it all mean? Who's to say...there was the one-off intrusion of whipped cream, but fortunately the nuts stayed away. That would have been problems.

Asking for "cherries" yields three most often, and sometimes two. Once in a wild, they go nuts and throw the whole mess on there. It's really hard to say.

Peace, love, and ice cream in 2015 to you...

Last edited by ironmanjt; Jan 16, 15 at 10:50 am
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Old Jan 15, 15, 6:59 pm
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*applause*

Thank you, now Im craving ice cream!
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Old Jan 15, 15, 7:48 pm
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One of the most important trip reports I've read. Bravo! Where's my sundae??
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Old Jan 15, 15, 8:28 pm
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United... consistently inconsistent.
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Old Jan 15, 15, 9:30 pm
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That was a fun read. ^
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Old Jan 15, 15, 9:45 pm
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Originally Posted by Osmo View Post
*applause*

Thank you, now Im craving ice cream!

+1^
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Old Jan 15, 15, 10:14 pm
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Kind of disappointed. I was expecting a whole (or half) review of nuts.
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Old Jan 15, 15, 10:42 pm
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Awesome Sundae report! :P
But... you seriously enjoy eating Maraschino Cherries? They are like the second most disgusting thing in the world, right after pickles (specially in hamburgers) !!
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Old Jan 16, 15, 12:56 am
  #9  
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One of the best trip reports I've read. Kudos.

I like ice cream. Who doesn't?

But all of those look gross. Shame on United.
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Old Jan 16, 15, 2:39 am
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Well, that was different but very lighthearted and enjoyable ^
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Old Jan 16, 15, 3:32 am
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Newark to Tel Aviv kills me, looks like they just got fed up and dumped a scoop of everything on
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Old Jan 16, 15, 4:32 am
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Now to see the all airlines F 2014 Caviar review.

Calling SFO777...
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Old Jan 16, 15, 4:53 am
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Never flew United, but now suddelnly I feel tempted, just to add one Sundae to the collection.
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Old Jan 16, 15, 8:32 am
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Muah ha ha... thank you for this inspired report. May 2015 melt in your mouth!
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Old Jan 16, 15, 8:52 am
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Nice job. But I always go with the poor cheese selection. Costco specials
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