Useful list of things to say when asked to switch seats
Feb 13, 2009, 10:12 am
#122
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: UK
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In all seriousness, I applaud you for helping people out when it's truly no skin off your nose. You sound like you have a great attitude. ^
Feb 13, 2009, 10:25 am
#123
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 1
- "That's all right, I don't mind sitting here."
- "Well I've already switched seats once and I can't be hopping all over the airplane!" (So I haven't really. So sue me.)
- "I'm sorry, but my religion prohibits me from shifting my buttocks while the plane is pointed towards this compass point."
- "Thank heavens! I don't care where your seat is, let's switch right away!" (They'll have second thoughts now...)
- "Duh ... change ... seat ...?" (drool a little, and repeat after any further requests, no matter how many there are.)
Feb 13, 2009, 10:28 am
#124
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: San Francisco Bay Area
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Feb 13, 2009, 9:56 pm
#125
Join Date: Oct 2006
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For PTtravel
I don't send alcohol because I'm traveling with children and I don't book five seats together because I'm traveling with children. If you had children you would understand! We have to travel at the peak times, holidays and school breaks and flights are hard to book.
I don't send alcohol because I'm traveling with children and I don't book five seats together because I'm traveling with children. If you had children you would understand! We have to travel at the peak times, holidays and school breaks and flights are hard to book.
Feb 13, 2009, 10:40 pm
#126
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Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Newport Beach, California, USA
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and I don't book five seats together because I'm traveling with children.
If you had children you would understand!
We have to travel at the peak times, holidays and school breaks and flights are hard to book.
That is the very definition of entitlement.
And, no, "We're traveling to Disneyland and couldn't get seats together," is not, in the least, a compelling reason to discomfort myself for your sake.
Feb 14, 2009, 12:34 am
#127
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Location: NL
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This one I can understand. I don't use alcohol myself, don't want my children to take alcohol so I should not offer anybody alcohol. That's just my POV. I do not say that anybody shouldn't drink alcohol (only don't drink too much of it), but I do not want to be involved with alcohol drinks myself - even not buying it for anybody else.
I do book five seats together when I'm travelling with my children just because I'm travelling with my children.
I do have children and I don't understand, so maybe you can explain?
We also have to travel at peak times, holidays and school breaks and I do know flight are hard to book, but you can plan ahead. In the last three years I managed to book three times longhaul flights on awards, which are even harder to get - and always got seats together. Even the one I booked one day (!!!) before, just by online checkin immediately after receiving the etickets.
So I still don't get your point.
I do have children and I don't understand, so maybe you can explain?
So I still don't get your point.
Last edited by Brobbel; Feb 14, 2009 at 12:39 am
Feb 14, 2009, 5:54 am
#128
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: NY by birth, BNA by choice - soon YXE, the SKY by virtue.
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Feb 14, 2009, 7:29 am
#129
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 4
well, to get back on topic, I wouldn't mind exchanging seats with anyone, as long as i won't be next to someone who has a bad odor. But i don't think i have to deal with it, some just choose to exchange seats with single traveler, i usually travel with my sisters or my husband.
Feb 15, 2009, 2:30 am
#130
Join Date: Nov 2008
Programs: Disgruntled HON**, Indifferent EK Gold, skeptical BA Silver
Posts: 1,734
It is used quite a lot and def. a matter of manners and politeness. There is nothing "old" to it.
Feb 15, 2009, 2:32 am
#131
Join Date: Nov 2008
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Glad, this is a misunderstanding
Mar 24, 2009, 1:29 pm
#133
Suspended
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Originally Posted by tfar
It is the other side of the coin in the US where a ton of people will go really out of their way to help a stranger and ask for nothing in return. In Europe both kinds of extreme behaviors are rarer.
Originally Posted by tfar
Asking for a favor implies a lowering of the asker and concedes power to the person asked. Saying NTY is demeaning and lowers the asker even further. It is hypocritical and almost mocking the asker because you are not being offered something but being asked something. Thus it is also semantically incorrect, hence my comment on intelligence.
The correct way to refuse granting the favor is to say something like: "I am sorry (that I cannot help you), but I'd rather stay in my seat."
This is the bare minimum. It would be better to indeed give a reason or offer some other kind of help, for example relocating luggage, in order to be civil and human. While those who refuse might say that they would never ask such a thing themselves and thus (do unto others...) have the reciprocal right to refuse, there is also the categorical imperative stating that your way of acting should be desirable as the basis for a universal law. In the western world (and in other worlds even more so) charity, unselfishness and helping people are higher values than insisting on your "rights" or convictions in a small case like the exchange of seats.
The correct way to refuse granting the favor is to say something like: "I am sorry (that I cannot help you), but I'd rather stay in my seat."
This is the bare minimum. It would be better to indeed give a reason or offer some other kind of help, for example relocating luggage, in order to be civil and human. While those who refuse might say that they would never ask such a thing themselves and thus (do unto others...) have the reciprocal right to refuse, there is also the categorical imperative stating that your way of acting should be desirable as the basis for a universal law. In the western world (and in other worlds even more so) charity, unselfishness and helping people are higher values than insisting on your "rights" or convictions in a small case like the exchange of seats.
Originally Posted by SamMarkand
I honestly do not care whether or not you learned archaic etiquette from the wife of a French ambassador or the son of a Tutsi chief. Those rules are archaic and have no place except in the enforcement of protocol that would be scarcely be expected in the public transportation conveyance of an airplane flight.
Originally Posted by SamMarkand
Both of my parents were born of the highest social strata of their countries of origin, but when they moved to the United States they put all of that class and social hierarchy behind them. In case you forgot, Americans went through several wars to ensure that we were culturally distinct from our European ancestors. They rejected those social hierarchies for a reason, and yet here we are bashed over the head with useless protocol and nonsense even to this day. Millions of immigrants moved her to get away from that, not to have it constantly pushed waved in the faces every time someone wished to enforce rhetoric they found objectionable by archaic standards.
Just my thoughts (outside view).
Originally Posted by AlecM
The points brought up are interesting - I will probably avoid its usage in the future under those circumstances.
Originally Posted by AlecM
My favorite usage peeve, however, is "no problem" instead of "you're welcome". In my mind it both:
- Unnecessarily implies that the favor granted could have been an imposition (a "problem) . If it really was, there are other ways to express it "("well, it was a challenge, but ...)- if it wasn't, why even bring up the possibility?
- Unnecessarily implies that the favor granted could have been an imposition (a "problem) . If it really was, there are other ways to express it "("well, it was a challenge, but ...)- if it wasn't, why even bring up the possibility?
Mar 24, 2009, 5:03 pm
#135
Join Date: May 2004
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Interesting discussions on both the switch seats issue and the etiquette issue.
The whole de nada, de rien, pas de quoi, it's nothing, no problem, no worries issue doesn't bother me particularly, unlike AlecM. To me, it is not suggesting to the person who requested the favor that their request might have been an imposition. Rather, it is suggesting that you know that by thanking you they have already considered an imposition, and you are reassuring them that in fact it wasn't, albeit in a shorthand and informal way.
Unlike SamMarkand, I am unwilling to throw out the baby with the bathwater. While some aspects of protocol and etiquette exist to reinforce social hierarchies, and should be dropped, others such as please, thank you, you're welcome are the opposite. You use these etiquette words to acknowledge that others are equal to you and entitled to courtesy. To not use them is what suggests entitlement and social hierarchy.
Now to the actual issue at hand. I am generally willing to trade seats on an equal basis, and will even take a mild downgrade on occasion if I feel that the requestor has the greater need. The simple 'I'm sorry, I can't (or won't) switch is enough otherwise. Providing a reason can result in the possibility of the less polite requestor getting into a discussion of the merits of your reason.
The whole de nada, de rien, pas de quoi, it's nothing, no problem, no worries issue doesn't bother me particularly, unlike AlecM. To me, it is not suggesting to the person who requested the favor that their request might have been an imposition. Rather, it is suggesting that you know that by thanking you they have already considered an imposition, and you are reassuring them that in fact it wasn't, albeit in a shorthand and informal way.
Unlike SamMarkand, I am unwilling to throw out the baby with the bathwater. While some aspects of protocol and etiquette exist to reinforce social hierarchies, and should be dropped, others such as please, thank you, you're welcome are the opposite. You use these etiquette words to acknowledge that others are equal to you and entitled to courtesy. To not use them is what suggests entitlement and social hierarchy.
Now to the actual issue at hand. I am generally willing to trade seats on an equal basis, and will even take a mild downgrade on occasion if I feel that the requestor has the greater need. The simple 'I'm sorry, I can't (or won't) switch is enough otherwise. Providing a reason can result in the possibility of the less polite requestor getting into a discussion of the merits of your reason.