My husband and I have had the upgrade issue come up before when we're traveling. On Delta, it is actually a bit more complicated to refuse an upgrade than to request one since its all automated now. I forgot to call ahead of time and tell them I didn't want an upgrade on a trip where my ticket was paid for and I used points for my husband. I didn't want to part with enough points to put him in first class so I thought that we'd both just sit by each other in coach... he's the only person I don't mind sitting that close to me! Well, I went to the Crown Room, and they said I'd already been upgraded. I offered the FC seat to my husband, who doesn't fly often, and he said he'd rather sit by me. I pressed him like, "you're sure, baby? really I wouldn't mind and you'd have fun... I sit up there all the time... you're totally welcome to take it..." and he insisted he'd rather sit by me. He's great! Anyway, we asked if I could have my old seat back and they gave it back to me. Then, at the gate, the agent was calling my name, and I approached, and she tried to hand me a different FC ticket... I laughed and explained what happened and that I wanted to sit by my husband, but again I gave my husband the opportunity to take it, and he refused. All the gate agents oohed and ahhed over what a sweet husband he was. They gave me my old seat back and called the next person up, who had heard the whole exchange and was thrilled to have the FC seat.

Its nice to be married to somebody who doesn't try to trade up and leave me behind at the first opportunity.

It's great that you see it that way. Many people would be annoyed to give a present (FC upgrade) away to a stranger, just because the SO wants to sit next to you another few hours. I would much more enjoy my SO spending some nice time in FC (assuming the SO doesn't fly often) than be cramped together in economy. There will be enough time to share stories after the flight again.

HTB.

BS. If he's selfish about his upgrades, he'll be selfish about other things where his comfort/interests are more important than hers.

When I gave my sister an Int'l F Award & was traveling w/ her, I bought an E ticket & upgraded to C. I could have given her a C award so we could travel together or even given her an E award & let her ride in the back, but I wanted her to experience Int'l F as it was her first trip out of the country & Int'l F is certainly much better than domestic F. You do stuff like that for people you care about.

Giving a non FF (especially one you supposedly care about if you're living w/ them) the upgrade would have been the right thing to do - or split it, so he gets it one way & she gets it the other if he didn't want to 'suffer' E for 10 hours out of his entire lifetime.

Still say :td: to the boyfriend.

Cheers.

He is going to let her ride in the back again?!?!?! Did he even try to upgrade her as well?

Sorry, that is selfish.

I agree completely. It doesn't say very much about how he'll respond to other situations life presents in the future, if they have a future. He should have offered the upgrade to her, at the very least, even if he ended up taking it for himself if she declined... that would still have been better than just taking it.

Well it's her fantasy world, not yours. She is shacking up with a guy who thinks about his own comfort first as we can see from his travel patterns when they go someplace together. Either she has low self esteem issues or she needs to move out and either get a place of her own or find a roomate. The guy is using her.

I'm glad your friend is reading this. Tell her she deserves better than this guy!!

to OP > sounds to me like the guy can be a complete a** **** :rolleyes:

if she is living with him ,his place .she would be using him even if he gets good benefits from her .

I was on the fence until this. For the first >100 posts, I thought I'd give him the benefit of the doubt - maybe he just didn't think about whether the ride up front may have been a nice perk to give to her. I've got a brother with a heart of gold, but sometime he just doesn't think. I could see him looking at this situation, and thinking that he was being very nice already by buying the ticket for her. But, I'm sure if my brother's GF told him that she was disappointed in the fact that he sat up front, she'd get the UG on the return. Not offering up the UG once is one thing... but then not offering it up the second time, after knowing it was an issue... well, now that's not cool.

I'm surprised that nobody has mentioned the window vs aisle seat discussion from "The Wedding Singer". It's essentially the same thing - giving up the better seat to the GF, when she's never had the experience. If the OP's friend was as classy as Glenn was in that movie, he's not going to be around too long.

I still don't think we're getting the whole, unbiased story, though... I'd like to see the OP's friend and GF both post with their sides of the debate, so we can understand what's also influenced this decision...

BINGO!!!!!
^^^^

IMHO, she should get upgraded.... to a better bf!

I've been thinking about this case once more.

What is so bad for the GF about this deal:

"I'll buy you a ticket, but when I get an upgrade I will take it."

The alternative could be:

"You buy your own ticket, and when I get upgraded I will give it to you."

HTB.

According to the story posted in the OP, the exchange has nothing to do with who provided the ticket but the fact that the BF (in this case) was an FF'er and therefore deserved the upgrade.

The way he he handled the upgrade indicates that he thinks of himself before he thinks of her. Not a good sign. I wonder what would have happened if the situation were reversed? But most important is how she sees it. If she doesn't have a problem with it, then it's not a problem.

I wonder if he read O. Henry's "The Gift of the Magi" in junior high school . . .

No more calls. We have a winner here :)