Tel Aviv, Israel. Not trying to enter the country but exit. But not passport control but security. I had recently spent a wee bit of time running around the Middle East in countries that did not have the best view towards Israel. The security person asked me the same question three different times, three different ways.

Now a few weeks before I entered Jordon via Aqaba. A the passport control one needed to purchase a visa. However, they did not take US dollars or any other foreign currency and I did not have any Jordanian Dinar. However, down the hall in the terminal there was an ATM machine. The officer gladly let us walk down the hall to the ATM and withdrawal the needed Dinar. We were not going anywhere given he still had our passports as well as our bags. I thought that pretty crazy. Though that evening's ride to Petra was crazier.

No, I did not expect anything else and was appreciative of that fact the entire trip. I was (badly?) comparing that to my experience at PVG where nobody spoke any English and my Mandarin was/is limited to counting to five. Not super useful.

That's their job.

Before I had Global Entry, I was entering the US in EWR. The BP agent looked at my US passport and then asked me if I had any other ID. I should have said no, but I wasn't thinking, so I pulled out my driver's license.

She compared them and said it was the same picture so my passport must be a forgery! She called over another guy and they went over them and kept saying they were the same picture. Then they said I don't look like my name. What does that even mean? " You don't look like someone with that name!" she yelled at me.

Since she never asked a question, I never gave an answer. What was I supposed to say? She went on for a while, threatening to call a supervisor. The other guy kept saying 'Take him to the room'. I just stood there dumbfounded.

Finally, she just threw my documents back at me in disgust and I walked away. While I waited for my connection home in the Newark airport, I sat down on my phone and applied for Global Entry. Once I got GE, I haven't been asked a question by a Border Agent since. The only thing they say to me is 'Welcome Home".

I get questioned every time I am entering the EU through Frankfurt. Lots of questions. Same when I went through Narita. I've learned to keep my mouth shut and only answer direct questions and then only answer the actual question.

Everywhere in the second world. And if you don't know where that is get off my lawn!

What's the significance of the even number?

USS = Universal Studios Singapore

The last time I went through AMS I got hassled; I had gone through many times with no hassle. It was probably because I had recently spent 45 days in Schengen and was back soon.

Ooh I did have a weird uk encounter in May 1998 when I flew to uk to see the uk band Saint Etienne tour their new album in the uk. I had been in uk in feb 1998 for a day as part of a Europe trip plus I had to get my paper tickets (I definitely now prefer digital tickets). Then I was in Shanghai in March 1998. I go to uk (Sfo-LHR) in May 1998 and the immigration officer is confused by my passport because he sees my uk entry stamp from February 1998 and then sees a USA entry stamp from March 1998. I mention that I was only in uk for a day in February 1998 and how I flew home the following day. I’m now back to see the Saint Etienne tour. I totally forgot about the Shanghai trip so don’t even think to mention it. The immigration officer remains confused and i’m thinking about how i’m supposed to meet my buddy and that we’re already plotting to go to some music venue in a few hours (Camden Falcon) so I just can’t even think of WHY my passport shows the entry to uk and then the entry to USA. Finally the officer returns my passport and wishes me a good trip.

One of the most sarcastic immigration officers I had was departing New Zealand. My wife and I were in our early 20s and both between jobs at the same time and having enjoyed a decent redundancy package on my side we took a several month RTW trip no holds barred which included all flights in First Class. Part of that was a CHC-SYD flight where QF only offered J class and the NZ exit immigration form required an occupation. The wife and I both listed unemployed and handing over the forms with the required boarding passes..."Must be nice" the immigration officer chirped. I asked him what he meant, "That you're both unemployed and yet flying business class" he started, his tone inferring we were some kind of drug barons or money launderers. I didn't think it wise to sarcastically respond with something along the lines of, "yes, unfortunately, our ticket is for First Class but Qantas don't run it on this route so we had to downgrade. I think we'll survive the 3hrs"...

I have observed some bizarre scrutiny of valid US passport users. I've seen some UK border control characters fuss over US passport users who at the time couldn't even be easily denied entry into the UK. I've seen Dutch passport control mess up and believe a US passport user was some kind of Baltic mafia boss. I've seen Swedish (and Danish) passport control fuss over US passport users who had lots of passport page supplements in them. I've seen Danish passport control fuss over a US passport user flying to get between Scandinavian destinations instead of using surface transport means. I've seen Belgian passport control as ask a US passport user if they had money to travel. I've seen Polish passport control fuss over non-European US passport users with EU identity documents presented along with their US passports. I've seen Australian passport control deny entry to a US passport user on a mileage run because they thought it was too little time to be in Australia. I've seen German passport control demand documents that aren't required for US passport users to leave Germany back to the US. I've seen Argentine passport control fuddle with lamination in a US passport, actually sort of damaging the passport. That's just for some of the incidents that are more memorable for me than others.

There used to be a man with my name (common surname, less common given name) who was on a few choice watch lists. This resulted in me receiving a bit of extra scrutiny upon entry to the US and a handful of other countries that presumably have access to the same database(s) for a three year stretch. Nobody ever beat me up over it though, and I was able to optimize my responses over time, eventually honing in on the simple, "I'm not him".