Skinny female seatmate raises armrest
Feb 12, 2019, 1:10 pm
#1
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Skinny female seatmate raises armrest
What would you do? I'm a late-middle-aged man. I was in a middle seat. A young woman sat in the aisle seat and immediately started chatting. I soon knew she was a college senior being flown to grad-school interviews at the universities' expense. I happen to be conversant in a field close to hers, so we could have an intelligent conversation.
After a while, she got absorbed in her work and I started watching a video. At some point I fumbled a bit with the armrest to find the "recline" button. She noticed me fumbling and, very cluelessly, proceeded to raise the armrest. I'm small, she was small, so I didn't have to do anything to avoid touching her. I thought it was kind of charmingly naive on her part, but now I'm wondering whether I should have found a way to point out that she might not want to do that when seated next to an older man she didn't know.
Any thoughts?
After a while, she got absorbed in her work and I started watching a video. At some point I fumbled a bit with the armrest to find the "recline" button. She noticed me fumbling and, very cluelessly, proceeded to raise the armrest. I'm small, she was small, so I didn't have to do anything to avoid touching her. I thought it was kind of charmingly naive on her part, but now I'm wondering whether I should have found a way to point out that she might not want to do that when seated next to an older man she didn't know.
Any thoughts?
Feb 12, 2019, 1:53 pm
#2
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 600
In this day and age, I would have insisted on putting the arm rest back down to avoid any allegations of harassment.
Feb 12, 2019, 2:24 pm
#3
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Not sure I would have even thought about it. But anyway, particularly with today's tiny Y armrests, I don't think it provides any real defense against someone groping, molesting, or assaulting the person next to them.
Feb 12, 2019, 2:27 pm
#4
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Feb 12, 2019, 2:38 pm
#5
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What would you do? I'm a late-middle-aged man. I was in a middle seat. A young woman sat in the aisle seat and immediately started chatting. I soon knew she was a college senior being flown to grad-school interviews at the universities' expense. I happen to be conversant in a field close to hers, so we could have an intelligent conversation.
After a while, she got absorbed in her work and I started watching a video. At some point I fumbled a bit with the armrest to find the "recline" button. She noticed me fumbling and, very cluelessly, proceeded to raise the armrest. I'm small, she was small, so I didn't have to do anything to avoid touching her. I thought it was kind of charmingly naive on her part, but now I'm wondering whether I should have found a way to point out that she might not want to do that when seated next to an older man she didn't know.
Any thoughts?
After a while, she got absorbed in her work and I started watching a video. At some point I fumbled a bit with the armrest to find the "recline" button. She noticed me fumbling and, very cluelessly, proceeded to raise the armrest. I'm small, she was small, so I didn't have to do anything to avoid touching her. I thought it was kind of charmingly naive on her part, but now I'm wondering whether I should have found a way to point out that she might not want to do that when seated next to an older man she didn't know.
Any thoughts?
Out of interest, how do you handle a subway seats without armrests or do you refuse to ride on them?.
PS-the most common complaint is fat female lifts armrest as cannot fit in her seat.
Feb 12, 2019, 2:50 pm
#6
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Feb 12, 2019, 2:54 pm
#7
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That's why I included "skinny" in the title.
Feb 12, 2019, 3:26 pm
#8
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Trying to hook up with some stranger three times your age is such a great way to start a trip to interview for graduate schools. This really shows poor judgment on her part, although perhaps she thought that the OP's fiddling with the arm rest was an invitation.
Feb 12, 2019, 3:27 pm
#9
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probably not on a DL flight, therefore no napkin that encouraged doing so 
Feb 12, 2019, 4:00 pm
#10
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I'm 100% sure she had no idea her action could be seen as flirting. She was quite obviously not socially aware. That's why I thought she might have benefited from a friendly word of advice.
Feb 12, 2019, 4:34 pm
#11
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Feb 12, 2019, 5:08 pm
#13
Join Date: Feb 2018
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What would you do? I'm a late-middle-aged man. I was in a middle seat. A young woman sat in the aisle seat and immediately started chatting. I soon knew she was a college senior being flown to grad-school interviews at the universities' expense. I happen to be conversant in a field close to hers, so we could have an intelligent conversation.
After a while, she got absorbed in her work and I started watching a video. At some point I fumbled a bit with the armrest to find the "recline" button. She noticed me fumbling and, very cluelessly, proceeded to raise the armrest. I'm small, she was small, so I didn't have to do anything to avoid touching her. I thought it was kind of charmingly naive on her part, but now I'm wondering whether I should have found a way to point out that she might not want to do that when seated next to an older man she didn't know.
Any thoughts?
After a while, she got absorbed in her work and I started watching a video. At some point I fumbled a bit with the armrest to find the "recline" button. She noticed me fumbling and, very cluelessly, proceeded to raise the armrest. I'm small, she was small, so I didn't have to do anything to avoid touching her. I thought it was kind of charmingly naive on her part, but now I'm wondering whether I should have found a way to point out that she might not want to do that when seated next to an older man she didn't know.
Any thoughts?
Feb 12, 2019, 5:11 pm
#14
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