Funniest inflight announcements
#1
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Original Poster
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Denver DEN-APA
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Funniest inflight announcements
I couldn't find an existing thread but I had to laugh at this one on yesterday's YUL-ORD Republic flight, from excellent FA Bonnie.
"...To enhance the appearance of your cabin crew, we are going to dim the cabin lights for taxi and take-off..."
"...To enhance the appearance of your cabin crew, we are going to dim the cabin lights for taxi and take-off..."
#2
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: BOS<>NYC<>BKK
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Long ago when airlines were in tough financial shape:
We know you have a choice of bankrupt airlines, and we thank you for choosing ours.
#3
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: New York NY
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We know that everyone of you knows how to fasten and unfasten a seat belt, but we still have to tell you that, to fasten, insert the metal fitting into the buckle, adjust to fit snugly with the loose end of the strap and simply lift the buckle release to unfasten.
#6
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: South Yorkshire, UK
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We have arrived 30 minutes ahead of schedule so please consider that banked for any future delays you may experience.
#10
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"In the event of cabin depressurization oxygen masks will fall from the ceiling above. If you find yourself in the washroom two oxygen masks will fall. Don't wonder why there are two oxygen masks, but put just one of them on"
#11
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Coast NSW, Australia
Programs: UA and SQ; Hilton, Fairmont, Marriott, Rydges Priority
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After a VERY heavy landing.
”Welcome to Singapore where the local time is 7pm.
As the captain taxis what’s left of this aircraft to the terminal we request all passengers remain seated........”
”Welcome to Singapore where the local time is 7pm.
As the captain taxis what’s left of this aircraft to the terminal we request all passengers remain seated........”
#12
Join Date: Apr 2004
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1) Pilot, after rough landing: "As you can tell, we just hit town."
2) FA as taxiing to gate after landing: "Please keep your seat belt on while taxiing to the gate. We'd hate to have you arrive at the terminal before the rest of the plane."
2) FA as taxiing to gate after landing: "Please keep your seat belt on while taxiing to the gate. We'd hate to have you arrive at the terminal before the rest of the plane."
#13
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Southern California
Programs: AA EXPlat, 2.4MM; HHonors Diamond
Posts: 580
On landing (JetBlue): "We are seeking volunteers to help clean the cabin after we reach the gate. If you would like to volunteer, please stand up before the airplane has come to a complete stop."
#14
Join Date: Dec 2014
Programs: UA GS ,QF Plat
Posts: 686
West Jet Captain - During the flight as we can't get a vending machine through the door the Flight attendants will be serving you a range of beverages
FA comeback - Thanks captain...... ,does everyone on board know the difference between a pilot and god ? ...... god doesn't think he is a pilot
FA comeback - Thanks captain...... ,does everyone on board know the difference between a pilot and god ? ...... god doesn't think he is a pilot