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-   -   Will You Switch Seats with my Husband? (https://www.flyertalk.com/forum/travelbuzz/1225714-will-you-switch-seats-my-husband.html)

NC_Girl Jun 13, 2011 10:28 am

Will You Switch Seats with my Husband?
 
Seems to be happening more and more the "will you switch seats with my husband/wife so we can sit together" question. I almost always oblige, even if it is from a window to an aisle/aisle to window to be a nice person. although, for a 50 minute flight RDU-ATL can you not be away from your spouse for that long ??? <insert rolling eye's guy> good grief But, this weekend took the cake. I was on ATL-MEX in 1A, my favorite seat as I like to put my feet up on the wall (yea, call me a hillbilly, but it helps relieve the pressure on my back, so can I claim a medical exemption??) and this husband wife comes on and she is seated next to me. She asks very nicely, can you switch seats with my husband so we can sit together? I am really not wanting to do it, but start to stand up anyway and she says "he didn't get upgraded but he is in an exit row so it should be almost as good as this" I stare at her in disbelief and sit my butt right back down without speaking and do my best to ignore her for the rest of the flight.

Come on people, It will not kill you not to sit with your SO for an hour or 2 or even 10 if the truth is told. If you are going to ask someone to switch seats with you, do it only if they are comparable seats. I like 1A or 1D don't ask me to switch to an aisle. Most people like Aisle seats, if you have one, ask them to switch only if you also have an aisle. And if you hubby is stuck in the back, and you desperately need to sit with him, go back there and ask the person sitting beside him to move up to the front. They will probably be happy to let you two sit together!!

OK, rant over......

Emma1420 Jun 13, 2011 10:56 am

I can't believe that person expected you to move into economy. Some people are just ridiculous.

And after ending up sitting next to a lap baby on trans-altantic a few years ago, I don't swap seats anymore (I probably would if a young child had been seperated from their parent, but that is about it). There are too many variables that I can't control. And for longer flights I'll pay extra for E+, and there seem to be a lot of passengers who want to trade me a E- seat for an E+ seat.

And I know that this has been discussed before, but why is it that when people want to trade seats they almost always want you to take a seat that is worse, they are never trading the crappy seat for a better one.

zcat18 Jun 13, 2011 11:00 am

It is absolutely absurd to ask someone to switch from F to Y on any flight, regardless of whether the Y seat is an exit row. I'm sure this lady was well meaning, but still, why would anybody expect someone to give up their F seat, assuming that the spouse in Y isn't gravely ill or disabled and in need of the wife's care during the flight? (and even in that case, such an arrangement should be specified beforehand)

You were right to refuse this particular request.

cordelli Jun 13, 2011 11:02 am

If she really wanted to sit next to her husband, she should have gone back and asked the person sitting next to him if he would mind sitting up in first class so that she could.

Gee, maybe next time a middle seat in the last row would be a good sway for 1a.

Dopes.

PTravel Jun 13, 2011 11:16 am

I'm getting the sense that women seem to be asked to switch seats more often than men. Have our female FTers found that?

kipper Jun 13, 2011 11:20 am

If she really needed to sit next to him, I agree that she should've asked whoever was sitting next to him to switch seats. I'm sure they'd have been thrilled to switch.

I generally will not switch seats, unless it's an aisle seat for an aisle seat, or a better seat.

BigBopper Jun 13, 2011 11:27 am

Maybe you guys are looking at this the wrong way. How do we know she "expected" you to switch seats? She probably knew it was a huge long shot but ya never know if you don't ask.

If I was ever traveling with my sweet, cute innocent looking wife and only one of us got an upgrade I'd probably have her try to pull the same thing. Of course, I know it would almost never work but it'd be worth it for the one time it does.:D

europegrad Jun 13, 2011 11:31 am

I'm a late 20s professional flying here and there (not on a daily basis). I honest don't like to be asked to change seats, but I answer nicely the first request with a polite no.

I usually take window seats and it is difficult to move around and so. If I am in the aisle, I might, or might not, change seats. No way I'm going to sit in the middle seats, though.

I notice that childless (in the flight) young couples are the ones most likely to pull the "can we change seats" card. Usually, they want somebody with a better seat to change for a worse seat, not he other way around.

DeirdreTours Jun 13, 2011 11:33 am

I am generally willing to switch, but I find the request OP relates to be way over the line. In similar circumstances, I would tell the woman directly that her request was ridiculous and further suggest that she would easily be able to switch with whoever was sitting next to her husband in Y.

On the point brought up by another poster-- My observation is that women are more likely to be imposed upon in many similar situations. For example, at my swim club swimmers are expected to share lanes during busy times. My observation is that both men and women are far more likely to jump into the lap lane a woman is swimming in than into the lane a man is swimming in.

edj3 Jun 13, 2011 11:46 am


Originally Posted by PTravel (Post 16552981)
I'm getting the sense that women seem to be asked to switch seats more often than men. Have our female FTers found that?

PTravel, this is my anecdotal experience only but yes, I do think I get asked more to switch seats precisely because I'm female and therefore considered an easy target. My husband almost never gets asked--in fact the only reason I qualified that statement is maybe he did once before we started dating 10 years ago. Maybe.

And I know we've beaten this topic to death before, but I'm going to go on record as saying I'm done switching seats. Ask away but I'll still nicely say no.

Babu Jun 13, 2011 11:51 am

kudos to you, NC_Girl, for keeping your cool. I would like to think I too would maintain civility upon this ridiculous request (maybe even snicker and say "nice try"), but I fear my response would have been less than polite.

Danthecran Jun 13, 2011 12:08 pm

Just my personal experience, when me and my fiancé fly we will book the window and aisle in a row in the hope that no one will sit between us, but if someone does we will ask them if they wouldn't mind switching with us (usually to my aisle). For some odd reason we have never been turned down :) not ask someone to move to a worse seat though is crazy. I don't get why she just didn't get up and ask whoever was sitting next to her husband to move, as she said it's basically just as good right!

rofly Jun 13, 2011 12:16 pm


Originally Posted by BigBopper (Post 16553065)
If I was ever traveling with my sweet, cute innocent looking wife and only one of us got an upgrade I'd probably have her try to pull the same thing. Of course, I know it would almost never work but it'd be worth it for the one time it does.:D

I'd be too ashamed to try this, as I feel it's insulting to the person you're asking to downgrade.

spring101 Jun 13, 2011 12:21 pm

My wife usually asks to switch seats so that she can get away from me for a couple of hours. ;)

drewguy Jun 13, 2011 12:22 pm


Originally Posted by cordelli (Post 16552899)
If she really wanted to sit next to her husband, she should have gone back and asked the person sitting next to him if he would mind sitting up in first class so that she could.

This.

I don't see how any other approach even comes close to reasonable. I hope OP pointed this out to the woman (or the husband OP was sitting next to).


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