Here's How to Encourage Gate Lice
 

First, a full 45 minutes before boarding (not before take-off, before boarding) announce "This is a full flight and we will not have enough space for everyone's carry-on bags."

Every ten minutes thereafter, continue to work the crowd into a lather by repeating that announcement and encouraging people to check their bags (not valet - check through to destination, with the requisite 45-minute wait at baggage claim, of course).

End result - no one checked their bags, extreme amount of people standing around the gate jockeying for position, on the plane, people in the back stowed their bags in the first overhead slot they saw, instead of near their seat. And they did not run out of overhead space after all!

I assume the GA thought he was doing some good, but he just made a bad situation out of nothing.

I know that, practically speaking, there's not much the FAs can do about this. But I do occasionally fantasize about them immediately removing said bags and chucking them out the door onto the tarmac :)

as the FA will tell you, "overhead bins are shared space". You're not entitled to the bin over your seat, or near your seat, or any space at all.

I know. But it's a massive source of inefficiency during both boarding and deboarding, and I'm entitled to give the evil eye to anyone who engages in the practice.

And I'm entitled to be all like *cough*...hole*cough*, all clever-like so everyone thinks I'm coughing instead of calling you names. ;)

Well played, sir.

And as moderator, I'm entitled to say that if we can't discuss the topic without hurling crude remarks around, the thread is closed. Ocn Vw 1K, Moderator, TravelBuzz.