Tsukiji

Analise - what does that have to do with op's question? How does his answer affect the parenting advice you'll give him?

To the OP - sounds like a mix of terrible twos and jet lag. I have a strong suspicion too that she is ready for a big kid bed. It was a challenge with my daughter when we made the transition at 20 months but it DID get better.

And to third that suggestion to have her ears checked - ear infections have been know to turn the mildest mannered babes into banshees!

All the best to you and your wife - hope your little one it back to her normal self soon.

Analise

I am trying to understand why it is only the child's mother who can't sleep, according to the OP's words, due to the suffering of her child.

fajimenez

He could be a road warrior and not be at home most of the time.

CDTraveler

Have you stopped to consider that the OP's family may have divided family responsibilities along the lines that works best for them?

I was lucky enough to be a stay at home mom when my son was very young, but his dad worked long hours to provide for us - that's the way we chose to structure our family life, and as a consequence, I did most of the nighttime parenting because my husband needed enough sleep to be able to function for long days at work. Nothing sexist or derogatory about the situation - we divided the chores according to what worked for our family.

To the OP: it sounds like massive jet lag coincided with the start of a new developmental phase, and the bad news is the tired-er a child is, the harder it is for them to fall asleep. Yes, this completely contrary to adult logic, but lots of studies (and many experienced parents) have shown it to be true.

My suggestion is twofold: let your child sleep whenever and whereever she can for about a week, and when she starts to be less flat-out exhausted, introduce a new bedtime routine. Perhaps she is ready to move to a bed, or add more bedtime stories, or maybe bedtime music. When my son was about 3, we bought him a little CD player that sits next to his bed. At first, the only time he was allowed to listen to it was bedtime - which made him very eager to hop in bed. We'd start a CD of soothing music, and very soon he was asleep. One other time he went through a phase of having problems sleeping, so I took him to IKEA and he picked out a new nightlight - again, the "bunny lamp" was only for nighttime, so to have it turned on, he had to go to bed. We never let him "cry it out" because that never fixed any problem. We prefered to recognize that different stages of childhood have different needs and with patience (which can be soooo difficult when you are dead tired!) we identified his new stages of development and addressed the changes in his needs.

So, OP, I suggest that you amend the bedtime routine in a way that encourages your daughter to want to go to bed - just getting her into her bed is about 75% of the problem. Maybe new sheets, maybe music, maybe a new nightlight. Best wishes to you!

Analise

Making assumptions can lead people astray. I try not to do that; many times I fail. That said, both my parents worked 40+ hours/week and both slept minimally when one of us was sick. I can't imagine one parent getting a pass. I wish the mother strength and fortitude.

tazi

My son at 4 went through a difficult transition period when we moved from MD to NY. The excitement of the trip and the disruption of his 'norm' left him a very cranky little boy for about a week or two.

Streetcar

We fly with our kids from the U.S. to France and experience jet lag with them (they are 4 and 1 1/2). It usually takes a week. We got back into France last Saturday (27 August) and tonight (3 Sep.) is the first night our kids are going to bed at a normal time. We use benadryl (sp?) for them. There is actually a dissolvable tablet that can work better than the actual liquid medicine. Just be patient and hang in there. They'll readjust. Good luck!

787

It is nice when people who actually have kids, and personal knowledge post on this forum.

We have a flight with our 2 ˝ year old in a couple of weeks, and he is a very normal 2 ˝ year old which I’m sure plenty of FTers will not appreciate. We have avoided going the Benadryl route in the past, but were thinking about trying it this time. Any suggestions on dosages? Thanks

MarTN

We used Dimetapp when the kids were little -- they liked the taste.

Benadryl makes some kids hyper, including my 3rd. She had to take it for several days after we discovered she was allergic to penicillin. We have some great video of her, covered in allergic spots, dancing naked.

dhuey

This is reminding me why we haven't tried international travel with our kids in six years. If the point is to relax and enjoy yourself 6+ time zones away with your young kids, don't do it. At least if your kids are as high maintenance as mine.

sonora

I am somewhat in awe after reading this thread. We never flew commercial with the kids when they were little because I felt it would be unconscionably rude to inflict that on other passengers.

But to think, I missed the opportunity to drug them to get them to behave! A little liquid babysitter solves everything, eh?

787

There are always a few FTers around to pass judgement.

dhuey

Perhaps it would have been unconscionably rude in the case of your kids. However, at least half of the kids I've seen on planes have no problems at all. Mine have behaved at least as well as the average adult passenger -- on the flights. The problem for us was the nine time zone adjustment after arrival.

CDTraveler

Well, that says more about your children and your parenting skills than it does about children in general. I've never had cause to be embarassed by my son while traveling. He began traveling by air at 4 months, and six years later we're still getting compliments, not complaints, about him while traveling.

sonora

My parenting skills are just fine, thanks and I have the full grown results to prove it. Parents who feel that their children don't bother anyone else and are perfectly behaved are generally the ones with the biggest brats.

I was more realistic than that. My ability to tune out my kids' distractions did not mean that they weren't bothering others. In addition, young children's behaviour is not predictable. None of my children flew commercial before the age of six. Although the middle one probably would have done fine at almost any age, I could not be sure of that, so I chose to take responsibility for my actions and theirs and not inflict their behavior, possibly annoying, on others in the closed and confined environment of a commercial airplane flight.

There were also other venues they did not experience until they were of an age where their behavior was reliably good and the risk of inflicting annoyance on others very minimal. Formal dining was taught at home first, then in the homes of close friends and relatives, before actual restaurants were attempted.

There are too many children in public who have not learned to behave, and because the parents are oblivious and not bothered by the disruptive behavior they think no one else is either.