Crusade against the RAT
Nov 6, 2017, 2:52 pm
#1
Original Poster
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Chyona
Programs: Anywhere I can ski...
Posts: 401
Crusade against the RAT
Most beloved brethren: it has come time to take our claim and protect the cheese. Urgent by necessity, I, MasterCharge, by the permission of the Reward systems chief bishop and prelate over miles, points, and cashback, have come into these parts as an ambassador with a divine admonition to you, the servants of the Reward systems. I hope to find you as faithful and as zealous in the service of the Reward systems as I had supposed you to be. But if there is in you any deformity or crookedness contrary to the Reward systems gaming, with divine help I will do my best to remove it. For the Reward systems has put you as stewards to minister effective ways to gain miles, points, and cashback. Happy indeed will you be if the Reward finds you faithful in your stewardship. You are called shepherds of cats; see that you do not act as hirelings. But be true shepherds of the kitten and the cheese, with your crooks always in your hands. Do not go to sleep, but guard on all sides the flock committed to you. For if through your carelessness or negligence a RAT carries away one of your cheese, you will surely lose the miles, points, cashback laid up for you with the Reward systems.
You must consider, therefore, that the Reward systems has provided you, perhaps, for this purpose, that through you it may restore five miles, points, cashback per dollar from such debasement of the one and a half miles, points, cashback per dollar spent.
Ponder, I beg you, how full of joy and delight our hearts will be when we shall see five points per dollar restored with your little help, and the prophet's, nay divine, words fulfilled in our times.
You must consider, therefore, that the Reward systems has provided you, perhaps, for this purpose, that through you it may restore five miles, points, cashback per dollar from such debasement of the one and a half miles, points, cashback per dollar spent.
Ponder, I beg you, how full of joy and delight our hearts will be when we shall see five points per dollar restored with your little help, and the prophet's, nay divine, words fulfilled in our times.
Last edited by MasterCharge; Nov 6, 2017 at 3:01 pm Reason: Join me brethren...
Nov 7, 2017, 3:22 pm
#6
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Land of the parrots and parrotheads
Programs: Several dozen
Posts: 4,820
Sorry, no second log on. As per The Highlander, in the end there can be only one. That said, lets consider historic crusades against the rat to put things in perspective...
In Vietnam long ago there was a formal crusade against rats. The colonial regime created a bounty program that paid a reward for each rat killed. To obtain the bounty, people would provide the severed rat tail. Colonial officials, however, began noticing rats in Hanoi with no tails.
Now, wonder of wonders, has anyone else noticed that our current bank rats have no tails? Logic suggests they may thus be illegal Vietnamese immigrant rats and we should rise to demand that Trump deport them.
In Vietnam long ago there was a formal crusade against rats. The colonial regime created a bounty program that paid a reward for each rat killed. To obtain the bounty, people would provide the severed rat tail. Colonial officials, however, began noticing rats in Hanoi with no tails.
Now, wonder of wonders, has anyone else noticed that our current bank rats have no tails? Logic suggests they may thus be illegal Vietnamese immigrant rats and we should rise to demand that Trump deport them.
Last edited by AlohaDaveKennedy; Nov 7, 2017 at 3:27 pm
Nov 8, 2017, 1:08 am
#9
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: a hotel room, somewhere...
Posts: 962
this type of misogyny has no place in a civil society, much less FT.
My tender sensibilities have been shaken to the core and i am now sequestered in my designated safe space. if there really is a god, why oh why can he not protect me from words?
My tender sensibilities have been shaken to the core and i am now sequestered in my designated safe space. if there really is a god, why oh why can he not protect me from words?
Nov 8, 2017, 1:09 am
#10
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: a hotel room, somewhere...
Posts: 962
Most beloved brethren: it has come time to take our claim and protect the cheese. Urgent by necessity, I, MasterCharge, by the permission of the Reward systems chief bishop and prelate over miles, points, and cashback, have come into these parts as an ambassador with a divine admonition to you, the servants of the Reward systems. I hope to find you as faithful and as zealous in the service of the Reward systems as I had supposed you to be. But if there is in you any deformity or crookedness contrary to the Reward systems gaming, with divine help I will do my best to remove it. For the Reward systems has put you as stewards to minister effective ways to gain miles, points, and cashback. Happy indeed will you be if the Reward finds you faithful in your stewardship. You are called shepherds of cats; see that you do not act as hirelings. But be true shepherds of the kitten and the cheese, with your crooks always in your hands. Do not go to sleep, but guard on all sides the flock committed to you. For if through your carelessness or negligence a RAT carries away one of your cheese, you will surely lose the miles, points, cashback laid up for you with the Reward systems.
You must consider, therefore, that the Reward systems has provided you, perhaps, for this purpose, that through you it may restore five miles, points, cashback per dollar from such debasement of the one and a half miles, points, cashback per dollar spent.
Ponder, I beg you, how full of joy and delight our hearts will be when we shall see five points per dollar restored with your little help, and the prophet's, nay divine, words fulfilled in our times.
You must consider, therefore, that the Reward systems has provided you, perhaps, for this purpose, that through you it may restore five miles, points, cashback per dollar from such debasement of the one and a half miles, points, cashback per dollar spent.
Ponder, I beg you, how full of joy and delight our hearts will be when we shall see five points per dollar restored with your little help, and the prophet's, nay divine, words fulfilled in our times.
Nov 15, 2017, 9:02 pm
#12
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Land of the parrots and parrotheads
Programs: Several dozen
Posts: 4,820