Asked to lower shade

Old Nov 20, 19, 6:41 am
  #1  
Original Poster
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 63
Asked to lower shade

On our flight from AMS-MSP Saturday we were sitting in main cabin by the window in two seats. 10 H and J. About midway thru the flight we were asked by the flight attendant to lower our shades. At this point we were enjoying the scenery of Greenland which is beautiful to witness.
No big deal as this happens at times. I told the flight attendant no because we were enjoying the scenery, but we would as soon as we were done with Greenland. He said I would have to tell that to the passenger who complained. I said no, I wouldn’t do that - mostly because I am so confrontation avoidant. He persisted saying it was not his job to explain to the passenger why I would not lower my shade. I said, probably rudely when I look back on it, that it was not my job to talk to another passenger.
He then left and because I was now feeling bad and definitely did not want to get involved in any air rage, lowered the shades. But I feel bad about this whole incident.
I understand the flight attendant is always in a tough situation, but I don’t think it should be my job to talk to other passengers. Plus I love the window being open, but totally understand that it can bother other people.
Just an annoyance on an otherwise nice flight.
xiphoid76 is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 6:47 am
  #2  
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Hotlanta.
Programs: I've gone underground!
Posts: 3,432
Ibtl 🍿
emma dog is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 6:58 am
  #3  
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Somewhere
Programs: Delta FO (I use to be More)
Posts: 2,875
I remember when I was 10 on a TWA flight I was asked to lower the shade. I said no and they moved me up to first class which was empty so the others could enjoy their naps/movie.
basecamp, SDQBound, cre95 and 6 others like this.
HWGeeks is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 7:57 am
  #4  
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Programs: Bonvoy Amb; AA EXP
Posts: 1,125
Yes, this is a constant debate. One thing that isn't often discussed, though, is when the sun is beaming into other passenger's faces, but yet doesn't affect the person on the window. A few times recently, I was getting killed by the glare from the other side of the aisle and there was virtually nothing that could be done about it. Typically, if the shade is lowered to half-way, the glare is eliminated but the person can still see what they want to see or they can still get some natural light.
Yemona, tvnwz, Fontaine and 9 others like this.
Score8 is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 8:03 am
  #5  
Marriott Contributor Badge
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Bainbridge Island, WA
Programs: Only what my AmEx Plat offers me
Posts: 6,814
I always reserve a window and I always keep my shade up in day flights because I feel it helps diminish the claustrophobia I feel.
david55 is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 8:03 am
  #6  
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Programs: DL DM
Posts: 226
We just had another thread on this topic. The factors at play here would suggest that keeping the shades open was reasonable, specifically that you were on the north side of the aircraft, this occurred at either ~3 pm or 5 pm local time in AMS (DL161/163), and you were actively enjoying the view. A suggestion for Delta would be to have some eye masks for economy passengers to mitigate a situation like without having to speak with another passenger.
ajggiant is online now  
Old Nov 20, 19, 8:06 am
  #7  
FlyerTalk Evangelist
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Orlando, FL Area
Programs: Delta SkySponge ExtraAbsorbant, SPG Gold
Posts: 26,408
Whoever sits by the window controls the shade.
readywhenyouare is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 8:07 am
  #8  
 
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 55
Your statement is full of contradictions. At first you said "no big deal as this happens at times" but then proceeded not to lower the shade. You then said that you are "so confrontation avoidant" but proceeded to argue with the flight attendant. It is common courtesy to others when the sun is beaming into someones face across the way to just lower the shade. Flight attendants already have a tough job to begin with and the whole situation could have been avoided by you just lowering the shade as instructed...I digress.
Jeremy3292 is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 8:17 am
  #9  
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 76
I agree that if the sun is beaming in through your window and directly shining in someone's face then it is polite to lower your shade.

But it seems just as often it is just people who prefer a "dark" cabin. In that case, if they want to dictate whether the shade is up or down, they can choose a window seat. Otherwise, if they want it dark, perhaps they should invest in a good eye mask.

A flight attendant asking complicates the situation, as it is harder to tell a crew member "No" as opposed to a random passenger.
slutide is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 8:19 am
  #10  
Original Poster
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 63
Originally Posted by Jeremy3292 View Post
Your statement is full of contradictions. At first you said "no big deal as this happens at times" but then proceeded not to lower the shade. You then said that you are "so confrontation avoidant" but proceeded to argue with the flight attendant. It is common courtesy to others when the sun is beaming into someones face across the way to just lower the shade. Flight attendants already have a tough job to begin with and the whole situation could have been avoided by you just lowering the shade as instructed...I digress.
Sorry you feel this was full of contradictions. Let me explain.

It does happen all the time - and I usually lower the shade (but this time was enjoying Greenland).

I am confrontation avoidant with random people - but not with a staff member (that is very different as I feel they are employees - but I will not confront another passenger).

I said flight attendants have a tough job and I did lower the shade to avoid the situation (so I guess I don't understand how I was full of contradictions there).

My main question in the thread was that I felt the flight attendant was wrong in asking me to talk to the other passenger. I don't care about the shade debate (it is clear in my mind that it is up to whoever is sitting next to the window)

I don't see any contradictions in my post, but I digress
xiphoid76 is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 8:23 am
  #11  
 
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 55
Originally Posted by xiphoid76 View Post
Sorry you feel this was full of contradictions. Let me explain.

It does happen all the time - and I usually lower the shade (but this time was enjoying Greenland).

I am confrontation avoidant with random people - but not with a staff member (that is very different as I feel they are employees - but I will not confront another passenger).

I said flight attendants have a tough job and I did lower the shade to avoid the situation (so I guess I don't understand how I was full of contradictions there).

My main question in the thread was that I felt the flight attendant was wrong in asking me to talk to the other passenger. I don't care about the shade debate (it is clear in my mind that it is up to whoever is sitting next to the window)

I don't see any contradictions in my post, but I digress
If your only point is to say "I shouldn't be asked by a flight attendant to talk to another passenger" then I wholeheartedly agree. I am shocked any flight attendant would ask you to confront another passenger to begin with.
angra, etiene, altabello and 1 others like this.
Jeremy3292 is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 8:25 am
  #12  
A FlyerTalk Posting Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Minneapolis: DL DM charter 2.3MM
Programs: A3*Gold, SPG Plat, HyattDiamond, MarriottPP, LHW exAccess, ICI, Raffles Amb, NW PE MM, TWA Gold MM
Posts: 87,072
Did the FA point out the passenger who had made the request? If the request was made discretely, such as by the other passenger walking to the galley and talking to the FA there (out of the OP's view/hearing), to me it would seem improper for the FA to then point out the passenger to the OP and telling the OP that he/she had to talk to the other passenger.
MSPeconomist is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 9:02 am
  #13  
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 334
I feel the passenger asking you to lower the window shade was unreasonable, and they were DEFINITELY out of line by getting the flight attendant involved.

I also feel you were too nice, by giving up something you enjoyed. I've seen Greenland from the air, and its beauty always amazes me.

Here's how I would handle it:

1. On longer daylight flights, where an open window shade is likely to inconvenience some passengers, I'll keep my window shade just half open, or even 1/4 open if I'm on the sunny side of the aircraft. This blocks the worst of the sun's glare, while still enabling me to enjoy the view. If I have my window shade open just a little, I've never been asked to close it the rest of the way, even on flights where many of the other window shades were lowered.

2. If I'm ever asked to lower my window shade more than that, I'll say that I feel claustrophobic in enclosed spaces, and for "emotional support" reasons, I need to be able to look out the window.

If other people routinely bring pets onto aircraft and pretend they are "emotional support" animals, I should be able to leave my window shade partly up for "emotional support" reasons, too.
JoeDTW is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 9:02 am
  #14  
 
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 1,293
Originally Posted by xiphoid76 View Post
He said I would have to tell that to the passenger who complained. I said no, I wouldn’t do that - mostly because I am so confrontation avoidant. He persisted saying it was not his job to explain to the passenger why I would not lower my shade. I said, probably rudely when I look back on it, that it was not my job to talk to another passenger.
* you shouldn't feel bad
* the FA should not have put the burden of explaining yourself to another passenger on you
* if he continued to press the issue then being a bit rude with the pushback is understandable

Honestly, the FA even asking you if you're actively looking out the window is over the line IMO. It's one thing if you're dozing off but even then it should be a one-time ask and the FA should accept whatever response the window seat passenger gives with no further pushback at all.
WillBarrett_68 is offline  
Old Nov 20, 19, 9:04 am
  #15  
 
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 1,293
Originally Posted by Jeremy3292 View Post
Flight attendants already have a tough job to begin with and the whole situation could have been avoided by you just lowering the shade as instructed...I digress.
it could have been avoided if the FA didn't press the issue. It's absurd that you accuse the OP of "contradictions" about avoiding confrontation when the FA brought the confrontation to the OP.
WillBarrett_68 is offline  

Thread Tools
Search this Thread
Search Engine: