Proper Ettiquete?

Old Aug 2, 18, 6:30 pm
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Proper Ettiquete?

Question to the forum. Was "upgraded" to Comfort+ in the middle seat. A couple had seats on aisle and window. They proceeded to pass things back and forth on the plane quite often and talked to each other. I know they have the right to do so, but what it typical proper etiquette? I would have thought that its ok to plan aisle and window and if someone shows up to move so you can be together and not have someone hear things back and forth.

It is what it is, but just like to hear thoughts
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Old Aug 2, 18, 6:32 pm
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Originally Posted by Fred 3 View Post
Question to the forum. Was "upgraded" to Comfort+ in the middle seat. A couple had seats on aisle and window. They proceeded to pass things back and forth on the plane quite often and talked to each other. I know they have the right to do so, but what it typical proper etiquette? I would have thought that its ok to plan aisle and window and if someone shows up to move so you can be together and not have someone hear things back and forth.

It is what it is, but just like to hear thoughts
is it “ok”? — absolutely yes

is it mandatory (or should it be expected, by the person who gets the middle)? — absolutely no

is it nice if they offer? — yes

is it ok to ask them? — I certainly wouldn’t, but I don’t speak for anyone else
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Last edited by jrl767; Aug 2, 18 at 6:38 pm
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Old Aug 2, 18, 6:33 pm
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I would keep asking them if they would like to sit together. Like, each and every time they did that. Are you SURE you don't want to trade seats? Are you SURE you don't want to sit together? Are you SURE you wouldn't be more comfortable switching seats? Maybe start answering when they talk to each other. Or just generally be a passive aggressive pain in the butt, without ever actually seeming rude.

Eventually they would either stop being rude, or switch seats.
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Old Aug 2, 18, 6:36 pm
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Originally Posted by Fred 3 View Post
Question to the forum. Was "upgraded" to Comfort+ in the middle seat. A couple had seats on aisle and window. They proceeded to pass things back and forth on the plane quite often and talked to each other. I know they have the right to do so, but what it typical proper etiquette? I would have thought that its ok to plan aisle and window and if someone shows up to move so you can be together and not have someone hear things back and forth.

It is what it is, but just like to hear thoughts
Not sure about proper etiquette, but if I was the couple I would think it awkward if there was some random person between us on the flight.
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Old Aug 2, 18, 6:41 pm
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It’d be one thing if the person in the window asks the aisle to grab them stuff out of the overhead bin, but if they were regularly passing food and stuff in front of me I’d probably get annoyed, say “thanks”, and start grabbing and eating it. ��
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Old Aug 2, 18, 6:44 pm
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If they kept passing food in front of you, a couple well timed sneezes would solve that. If they pass items, you could suddenly flinch and knock it out of their hands and apologize muttering something about special forces training and war zone flashbacks.

Possibilities are endless!
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Old Aug 2, 18, 7:08 pm
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If they are non-rev passengers, they aren't allowed to ask other passengers to switch seats. But you can make the request, and they can accept.

Non-rev or not, absolutely it's rude to do what they did, although they could have been oblivious to the annoyance to you. With 20/20 hindsight I say you should have spoken up ("Hey folks, this back-and-forth is getting old, would one of you mind switching seats.")
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Old Aug 2, 18, 7:19 pm
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What are they passing? I fly with my wife a lot next to me but can’t think of anything we have passed to each other. Generally we board, head phone up, and take after we land. If she wants something she better have brought it. :-)

About the only reason we sit next to each other is because she does not feel bad making me get up for a trip to the lav.
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Old Aug 2, 18, 7:42 pm
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Originally Posted by Jon_R View Post
What are they passing? I fly with my wife a lot next to me but can’t think of anything we have passed to each other. Generally we board, head phone up, and take after we land. If she wants something she better have brought it. :-)

About the only reason we sit next to each other is because she does not feel bad making me get up for a trip to the lav.

Marriage counseling?
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Old Aug 2, 18, 7:50 pm
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You juxtaposed the "t's" in "etiquette".

Yeah... I'm that guy.
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Old Aug 2, 18, 7:50 pm
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Personally, I think it common courtesy to have one of you move to the middle. If you choose not to, any communication and passing stuff over the middle seat should be kept to a bare minimum.
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Old Aug 2, 18, 7:54 pm
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This happened to me on a flight once. It was a last minute buy from JFK to Dusseldorf on AirBerlin about 7 years ago.

I got stuck in a middle seat and the guy next to me and the chick at the window appeared to know each other and speaking German.

I pulled out the free playboy and started making comments like mmmm, wow, nice. Eventually, the dude switched seats with me.
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Old Aug 2, 18, 7:55 pm
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Originally Posted by jdrtravel View Post
Marriage counseling?
planes are loud enough. I can’t think of a worse place to try and carry on conversations. I just head phone and ipad it until flight is over. Will switch to the delta screen during the meal.
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Old Aug 2, 18, 8:11 pm
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While I am usually meticulously equitable in my use of arm rest space, in this case I would have colonized every square inch and also engaged in some serious manspreading. And probably watched a film on my phone without using headphones.
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Old Aug 2, 18, 8:20 pm
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I think it is your loss because you got a middle seat. Next time fly first class or be prepared to deal with this sort of thing: coach class people are gross.

You are very welcome to meet them in grossness, sneeze in their food and participate in the conversation, give marriage advice, etc. That’s what happens in coach anyway. Don’t worry about étiquette (this is how to spell it, there is no alternative). Etiquette (note there is no accent when you capitalize) belongs to the other side of the curtain and then... probably not on a US airline.
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