Guess What Delta Will Announce as 2016 "Enhancements"
 

With Skymiles 2016 on the horizon, as a Diamond medallion here are my guesses as to the next round of "enhancements" to the Skymiles program.

• All existing seat reservations for non-Diamonds will be changed automatically to middle seats.
• American Express pay-with-points option will no longer be allowed
• In the spirit of discontinuing around the world tickets, Delta will discontinue round trip tickets moving to a Southwest-esq one-way ticketing model.
• Medallion complimentary upgrades will be disabled for any pax not traveling in a Y or B fare class.
• Complimentary Skyclub membership rules will be changed - in addition to not being able to bring a guest to the Skyclub, flyers holding a complimentary membership will be asked to pay for the person standing behind them in line.
• The luxury bar within the Skyclub will now include Coca-Cola and Water. No drinks will be given for free.
• Delta will begin offering a Reverse VDBC program, where passengers will be required to pay for the privilege of being bumped from a flight.
• All fare classes will earn reduced MQMs
• All 747 routes are being replaced by a flock of modified MD-88s which can be refueled mid-air by US Air Force tankers. No meal service will be provided.
  

Why are you giving them ideas?! :P

DO NOT TRADE THE STOCK.

You obviously have material non-public information and you would be engaging in 'Insider Trading". I'm certain that you don't want to go to jail as Martha Stewart did.

The southwest one-way thing isn't too bad.

you forgot a few :
- no more complimentary EC for PM or DM, this will increase the availability of seats.
- 25$ phone charge for all customers, allowing our valued customers less hold times
- 10$ checked carry on bag fees to help insure more overhead bin space for our valued customers.
- paid meals in J so they can insure better quality of product

Tweet "Delta is great!" and automatically receive DM plus 1 million miles. (Targeted only to NYC and SEA residents.)

Citing AA's new feature of shuttling elite passengers to transfer gates in Cadillac cars, DL will now allow its elite passengers the opportunity to rent a Cadillac and drive DL executives to and from the airport ;)

ROFL (again)

The forum is "hot" today.

:D

I'd like to see a fleet of all J lie-flat CR2's! 1-1 seating. It'll feel like the B747 UD. ;)














BTW,
Eye - Bee - Tea - Elle
;)

Carry on baggage that cannot fit underneath the seat in front of you will be charged at $40 per item. $50 if you have to gate check

In the event of a sudden change in cabin pressure, oxygen masks will fall from the ceiling above you. Pull towards you and insert $6.23, exact change only or you may use a Delta branded American Express card to start the flow of oxygen. After 68.2 seconds you will have to insert another $17.29 (exact change or Delta branded American Express) for an additional 38.43 seconds of oxygen

Tip jar for the pilot and first officer. Want a direct route avoiding turbulence? You know what to do.

Tip envelopes on trays for FAs, like Marriott is doing for their housekeepers. DL wants to do it before some other airline (UA since they have a crossover type hook-up with Marriott). After all, we need to continue having UA copy DL rather than the other way around.

Delta will introduce a copy and paste version of the legendary US ( Useless Air) service concept.

Just so long as we get the standard onboard 20% discount!

;)

As someone else pointed out, how would that be a bad thing? Right now you have to pay full fare in general for a one-way ticket.