I had an opportunity to fly the jump seat on a 767 from Europe to Toronto. (well, I was in there for takeoff, over Greenland and for landing - and in my regular seat otherwise). Anyhow, the captain said. "You know about the sterile cockpit, right? When something goes wrong you'll notice anyways. Just stay out of our way. When we start screaming you can scream too, but then it won't be for very long"

Count me in the camp of "have heard the briefing enough times I could give it myself from memory". And I've flown on the same model planes enough times to know where the exits are and which one's closest to me.

So no, my life does not depend on listening to it again, especially given that half the time the microphone is clicking on and off all through the briefing, so that it's "To buckle your ... and tighten ... is illuminated" and so on.

So while were at it, here's a general rant about PA volumes. Even with my Bose QC3s on. Are these people ever subjected to listening to their own announcements?

When kids are on the plane, I always boost the noise cancelling headset with ear plugs. Paired with a movie at high volume and lots of shooting, this beats today's popular levels of crankiness and autism.

But the PA can still be heard, I concede. Especially the duty free and non-safety related items.

That's pretty much only on US airlines IME. I don't recall the PA ever blaring on non-US airlines.

It's the sign of a rock-bottom airline like Ryanair and their infamous scratchcards. BA do the same thing with droning on about flying start. Doesn't happen during the safety video though.

In my experience US carriers ramble on they don't really shout around .. but it's still loud an annoying.
The worst barkers I can recall dwelled on SQ. Especially on night flights they loved to crank up the PA to howitzer volume and sanctimonously howl "WE ARE ENCOUNTERING UNEXPECTED TURBULENCE. PLEASE FASTEN YOUR SEATBELTS, PARENTS PLEASE TAKE OUR THE INFANTS FROM THE BASSINETS" every 2 to 10 minutes.

A few overly sadistic and overzealous specimen would also rush through the coach cabin and rattle sleeping customers so those could better prep themselves mentally for the bumps ahead. In business I was woken twice by such individuals who only reluctantly apologised for not checking that I was wearing a seat belt.

But competition of the Middle Eastern carriers fixed this monstrous feature ... not sure what they did with the evil employees though.

I fly BA an awful lot, as I see you do too. The PA volume is nowhere near as loud as it is on UA for example. I wonder though, do non-US airlines raise the volume a bit on flights to and from the US? It might be some pressure from the FAA due to pressure from the stewardess unions or something.

There is absolutely nothing I'm going to learn from hearing the safety announcement for the n-hundredth time. I don't need to hear about your wonderful complementary soft drinks and for-purchase snack crap.

I especially don't want to hear about your "exciting offer" mid-flight. I absolutely hate in-air advertising that cannot be tuned out. Monetize the tray table? Fine, slap on a Claritin ad. But don't force me to listen to your credit card offer or the great perks of your frequent flier program.

Those PA announcements are loud enough to be annoying even with my noise cancelling headphones.

Ok, rant over.

Exactly.

"Smoking is prohibited blah blah smoke detectors have been fitted" - fine, I don't smoke, never have, never will.

"This is how you put on a seatbelt" - we're already in our seats and the flight attendant has already checked.

"Put luggage in the overhead or under the seat in front of you" - we're already :mad: seated :mad: and the luggage has already been stowed - stop wasting time.

This goes double (triple) for international flights where it's repeated in a second and third language. Yeah, I understood all that from the video while you were doing it in Arabic (2 minutes 45), but heck, run it all again with English voiceover just in case. :rolleyes:

I would ... if I had to listen to more PAs. I'd also resort to alcohol and tranquilizers.

Exactly, RadioGirl, which is why I say retire the entire archaic ritual. We've all heard it before. "A verbal agreement is worth the paper it's printed on." So when they ask if you can open the wing-exit door and you say yes it's actually meaningless. I mean at least that part of it gets an ack. For the plane wide-briefing we should all have to raise our right hand at the end and say "I do." We humans. We're so bloody inconsistent.

Since we are now tracked and stalked by TSA, NSA, etc., unlike back in the days of the free world when these announcements started, what's one more piece of record keeping? Have us all check a box on the airline's website that we have read and understand the safety briefing and will hold the airline harmless if we forgot how to inflate our life vest over Kansas. One time. Check a box. Put this archaic ritual where is belongs. A Boolean value in a MariaDB database somewhere. Boom. Done. Never to have to hear it again.

Yes, I am accepting your nomination votes for the next pres race. I got lots of ides.

Listening to the safety briefing is not of much use if one is hearing-impaired, which suggests that there must be an alternative means of preparing oneself for flight emergencies--and there is: the safety card. It is reviewable at one's leisure, and I have yet to see one that contains advertisements or other obnoxiousness.

I wouldn't object to more focus on pax in the exit row demonstrating that they have a clue about how to open the exit door, though, which might mean exit row pax should put aside the headphones, the e-reader, etc. for a minute (though not necessarily stowing them).

But not books, or newspaper (which will likely hamper people's escapes)?

You misunderstand. I was talking about pre-flight safety briefings.

You specified e-reader, rather than "book", I wondered why.

P.S you're Far more likely to need to use the emergency exit during the safety.brirfing than when the wheels are off the ground.

Does anyone else have issues with the volume on their tablets while flying? I end up listening because I cannot listen to my Nexus 7 movie while an announcement is playing.

Oh baloney. My Kindle with its case is less than 7 ounces. Before the Kindle, I rarely carried around a book less than 12-14 ounces, and often more. A book is just as much a "dangerous projectile."

Not only that but my Kindle has a padded case--I would say it's a bit softer than the spine side of a book.

Yep. The same would certainly apply to anyone who uses a soft skin type case.