Wet feet and the lovely 767s - how much water on the cabin floor is safe?
Jan 27, 2009, 2:52 am
#46
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Why? He expects me to kiss his feet (I suppose it could be worse. Just)
Jan 28, 2009, 2:38 pm
#47
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Airbus Water Features.
Now... This is one that mere passengers will never get to see... And... It is special... it is oh so special...
Let me set the scene...
Crew member No.5, doing the delightful, and much sort after in a certain crew community, "Night Moscow"... Oooohhh... I hear you all gasp! And I hear you saying under your breath.. "I see why BingBongBoy joined BA... for the glamor of the Night Moscow..."
Darling crew member No.5 sits on a double jump seat at Door 2 Right. When sat in the jump seat, looking directly ahead, you are faced with 3 hot beverage makers. Now...
After 11 hours hard work, serving the finest of fine Economy cuisine in the glamor cabin that is Euro Traveller, settling in for landing on my double luxury sofa of a jump seat, thinking... "Oh fab... I will be home in my luxury Zone 1 residence soon after... Getting in my Goose Down laden bed..."
I see the heady lights of Heathrow whizzing by as the wheels near the ground... and then...
As that Auto Braking kicks in... Almost in slow motion, as if I have been caught in the latest scene of a Hollywood block buster... A wall of brown colored murky water is flying towards me... and when I say a wall... I am not talking about a low 3 brick stack retaining flower bed wall... I am talking about a Tower of London size wall... And its flying at me fast... Just enough time to raise my hands in-front of my face... and it hits... I am soaked... and I mean soaked... My Julian MacDonald ensemble is ruined... Ruined beyond belief...
And it runs out, from a chat with a friendly engineer who was after a brew... That due to the slightly nose up flying angle, all the waste and excess water builds up during the flight, so by the time you land back into LHR, there is a good few gallons of water hiding behind the beverage makers... And if no one tells poor No.5... They get a rather wet wake up call at about 07:00...
Now... How does that compare to your refreshing Wake Up Shower in the Arrivals lounge????
Let me set the scene...
Crew member No.5, doing the delightful, and much sort after in a certain crew community, "Night Moscow"... Oooohhh... I hear you all gasp! And I hear you saying under your breath.. "I see why BingBongBoy joined BA... for the glamor of the Night Moscow..."
Darling crew member No.5 sits on a double jump seat at Door 2 Right. When sat in the jump seat, looking directly ahead, you are faced with 3 hot beverage makers. Now...
After 11 hours hard work, serving the finest of fine Economy cuisine in the glamor cabin that is Euro Traveller, settling in for landing on my double luxury sofa of a jump seat, thinking... "Oh fab... I will be home in my luxury Zone 1 residence soon after... Getting in my Goose Down laden bed..."
I see the heady lights of Heathrow whizzing by as the wheels near the ground... and then...
As that Auto Braking kicks in... Almost in slow motion, as if I have been caught in the latest scene of a Hollywood block buster... A wall of brown colored murky water is flying towards me... and when I say a wall... I am not talking about a low 3 brick stack retaining flower bed wall... I am talking about a Tower of London size wall... And its flying at me fast... Just enough time to raise my hands in-front of my face... and it hits... I am soaked... and I mean soaked... My Julian MacDonald ensemble is ruined... Ruined beyond belief...
And it runs out, from a chat with a friendly engineer who was after a brew... That due to the slightly nose up flying angle, all the waste and excess water builds up during the flight, so by the time you land back into LHR, there is a good few gallons of water hiding behind the beverage makers... And if no one tells poor No.5... They get a rather wet wake up call at about 07:00...
Now... How does that compare to your refreshing Wake Up Shower in the Arrivals lounge????
Jan 28, 2009, 2:55 pm
#49
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But if you fancy telling me exactly what goes on to make it so sought after .......... 
Great tale BBB - and I can believe the mess those brown murky waters can make of our fab designer uniform!!
Jan 28, 2009, 3:40 pm
#50
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Jan 28, 2009, 3:46 pm
#51
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Jan 28, 2009, 4:36 pm
#53
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Don't want to get kicked off here when I am just settling in!
Jan 28, 2009, 4:58 pm
#54
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You won't get kicked off, though you may find Pucci wants you to do her typing for her
Jan 28, 2009, 5:19 pm
#55
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TFTG = Tales from the Galley. Fabulous reports of all kinds of events that our beloved Pucci has witnessed on board. Everyone on here waits for a TFTG like a child waits for Christmas
You won't get kicked off, though you may find Pucci wants you to do her typing for her
You won't get kicked off, though you may find Pucci wants you to do her typing for her
Jan 29, 2009, 2:22 am
#56
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I did once have a flight out of Kano years ago on my second favourite route in the BCAL system - after Lagos where someone boarded and put something wrapped up in newspaper in the overhead locker. As we were busy trying to stop items weighing more than a small refrigerator in the lockers (DC10) - we did not notice. Someone actually brought a safe aboard once - albeit a small one. He did not trust anyone with his money and valuable - and had read that these should not go in the hold. We saw four people stagger up the stirs with it and you can imagine the rest when they were told that not only was this not going on the aircraft but would be charged for to go in the hold (I think that the excess charge ran to well over £500 and this was years ago).
Anyhow it transpired that what was wrapped in paper was a fish. Considered a delicacy it had been freshly caught some days ago and like company the fish had gone off. It also had water or something unspeakable in the stomach. On take off it poured wated out of the locker. Everywhere. All hell was let loose in the cabin. Yours Truly had to get the thing out, get everyone back in their seats and dispose of the truly disgusting whatever it was in the gash. The galley stank. Fortunately the smoking ban did not exist so I encouraged people to light matches to try and dispel the stench. It was the longest flight to LGW that I have ever known.
Bing-Bong - you have been misinformed. I have a typist already. He lives in Argentina. He does very little and is quite slow when he does - so the vacancy is filled. Anyway I do not want my business gossiped all over Short Haul! I do have some pride in spite of my poor choice of domestic help.
Jan 29, 2009, 6:02 am
#57
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Bing-Bong - you have been misinformed. I have a typist already. He lives in Argentina. He does very little and is quite slow when he does - so the vacancy is filled. Anyway I do not want my business gossiped all over Short Haul! I do have some pride in spite of my poor choice of domestic help.
Jan 29, 2009, 6:09 am
#58
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Jan 29, 2009, 6:23 am
#59
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It was enough to soak my shoes as well as my feet, and 3 layers of newspapers. That's 3 newspapers - the Mail, Guardian and Telegraph - not 3 sheets) - which were soaked through in minutes of putting them down. The lady's bags behind me got the wet 767 treatment too, so it was flowing back down the cabin.
Now that I see this is a problem happening on occasion, I am reminded that we need to be wary what we put down on the plane floor. Do waterproof socks exist??
By the way this is my first post ever. Exciting to be able to contribute, even though I see the thread has progressed in a very different direction by the time I'm getting to this story!
Jan 29, 2009, 6:26 am
#60
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