The rise of the "Fake" lounge and other matters arising...
May 8, 2017, 7:14 am
#1
Original Poster
Join Date: Feb 2015
Programs: BA Gold, Avis President
Posts: 438
The rise of the "Fake" lounge and other matters arising...
Good afternoon gentle reader from the champagne bar of the F lounge 
,
On an ex EU out of AMS to BKK departing on the BA 9 glider...and I'll make Gold again...hurrah...
After visiting the lounge at AMS I've decided that we need to have a new classification recognising the rise of the BA "fake" lounge.
These are the lounges whose food and facilities are so dismal that frankly its best to stay outside with the unwashed and pay up...in other words they are "fake" lounges.
Frankly BA would be better off simply roping off an area somewhere in the departure hall, provide a few chairs, a flask of coffee, a basket of biscuits and perhaps a big portaloo...and have done with the pretence of it. They should now and hence forth be referred to as "waiting rooms"...similar to those on the LNER a century ago.
Next rant...
The flight out of AMS was delayed by 50 minutes due to seven passengers not making it to the gate and the inevitable need to off load luggage. Clearly we had a group of lads after a weekend on the piss, somehow making it to the airport on time but getting lost on the way to the gate.
Well Amsterdam has a museum of torture and it did occur to me that perhaps BA could rent some of their...errr...implements and allow those with status to put them to good use on such miscreants.
Their bodies (I mean the miscreants, not those with status), smeared with tar to preserve them, would then be placed in iron cages and hoisted from a gibbet placed specially at the take-off zone for all to see...like pirates of old...@:-)
Just an idea...I am 14 years old ok...??
Chris
,On an ex EU out of AMS to BKK departing on the BA 9 glider...and I'll make Gold again...hurrah...
After visiting the lounge at AMS I've decided that we need to have a new classification recognising the rise of the BA "fake" lounge.
These are the lounges whose food and facilities are so dismal that frankly its best to stay outside with the unwashed and pay up...in other words they are "fake" lounges.
Frankly BA would be better off simply roping off an area somewhere in the departure hall, provide a few chairs, a flask of coffee, a basket of biscuits and perhaps a big portaloo...and have done with the pretence of it. They should now and hence forth be referred to as "waiting rooms"...similar to those on the LNER a century ago.
Next rant...
The flight out of AMS was delayed by 50 minutes due to seven passengers not making it to the gate and the inevitable need to off load luggage. Clearly we had a group of lads after a weekend on the piss, somehow making it to the airport on time but getting lost on the way to the gate.
Well Amsterdam has a museum of torture and it did occur to me that perhaps BA could rent some of their...errr...implements and allow those with status to put them to good use on such miscreants.
Their bodies (I mean the miscreants, not those with status), smeared with tar to preserve them, would then be placed in iron cages and hoisted from a gibbet placed specially at the take-off zone for all to see...like pirates of old...@:-)
Just an idea...I am 14 years old ok...??
Chris
Last edited by Chris_G; May 8, 2017 at 7:18 am Reason: spelling
May 8, 2017, 7:20 am
#2
Moderator, Iberia Airlines, Airport Lounges, and Ambassador, British Airways Executive Club
Join Date: Feb 2010
Programs: BA Lifetime Gold; Flying Blue Life Platinum; LH Sen.; Hilton Diamond; Kemal Kebabs Prized Customer
Posts: 63,783
Yes, well that's quite old around here, I sometimes feel.
Smile, be happy for the lads who probably had a wicked weekend, the lounge has a terrific view, and it's going to be a great day for flying into London, view wise. So mostly it's good. And AMS is more compact than BKK!
Smile, be happy for the lads who probably had a wicked weekend, the lounge has a terrific view, and it's going to be a great day for flying into London, view wise. So mostly it's good. And AMS is more compact than BKK!
May 8, 2017, 7:24 am
#3
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: JER
Programs: BA Gold/OWE, several MUCCI, and assorted Pensions!
Posts: 32,145
*Avis Rara on FT
May 8, 2017, 7:28 am
#4
Join Date: Sep 2008
Programs: BA Gold
Posts: 84
Frankly BA would be better off simply roping off an area somewhere in the departure hall, provide a few chairs, a flask of coffee, a basket of biscuits and perhaps a big portaloo...and have done with the pretence of it. They should now and hence forth be referred to as "waiting rooms"...similar to those on the LNER a century ago.
May 8, 2017, 7:34 am
#5
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: London
Programs: Mucci. Nothing else matters.
Posts: 38,644
After visiting the lounge at AMS I've decided that we need to have a new classification recognising the rise of the BA "fake" lounge.
These are the lounges whose food and facilities are so dismal that frankly its best to stay outside with the unwashed and pay up...in other words they are "fake" lounges.
These are the lounges whose food and facilities are so dismal that frankly its best to stay outside with the unwashed and pay up...in other words they are "fake" lounges.
May 8, 2017, 7:40 am
#7
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Europe & Indonesia
Programs: BAEC Gold, LH SEN, EK ex-Gold, IHG Plat
Posts: 11,571
Fly Air Berlin. That's precisely their lounge concept and they call them "Executive waiting areas".
Last edited by Maluku_Flyer; May 8, 2017 at 7:57 am Reason: typo
May 8, 2017, 7:50 am
#9
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 2,676
You have to be careful complaining about things like this. In these BA cost led days - feedback like that could lead to missives from BA that read "following customer feedback about the quality of our overseas lounges we've decided to improve the range and quality by shutting every overseas lounge and going into partnership with wetherspoons (a 'quality' British brand) to provide lounge access with a per usage fee. You'll be able to buy access on the door and food/drink once inside with Avois or Card (cash not accepted). All lounges will close immediately but the new lounge facilities will come on stream over the next 20 years. Food and drink provision will be first come first served with availability carefully worked out so that 1/2 the people don't get their first choice."
May 8, 2017, 7:54 am
#10
Ambassador, British Airways; FlyerTalk Posting Legend
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Leeds, UK
Programs: BA GGL/CCR, GfL, HH Diamond
Posts: 42,944
Not sure where the 50 minutes comes from? It was 31 minutes late pushing back, and arrived 32 minutes late at T5.
Results from https://www.ExpertFlyer.com
Results from https://www.ExpertFlyer.com
Code:
Flight Status Search:
Departing on 08/05/17
Flying BA flight 431
Flight Status Depart Location Depart Date Reliability Arrive Location Arrive Date
AMS Scheduled: 08/05/17 11:40 AM LHR Scheduled: 08/05/17 12:00 PM
BA 431 Landed Term: Estimated: 08/05/17 12:11 PM 71% / 16m Term: 5 Estimated: 08/05/17 12:32 PM
Gate: Actual: 08/05/17 12:11 PM Gate: Actual: 08/05/17 12:32 PM
Baggage: 3
Comments:
"DOBA431/08MAY
* OPERATIONAL FLIGHT INFO * BA 431 0 MO 08MAY17
CITY INFO HOUR (LOCAL)
AMS ESTIMATED TIME OF DEPARTURE 1140
LEFT THE GATE 1211
TOOK OFF 1232
ESTIMATED TIME OF ARRIVAL 1237 LHR
LHR AIRCRAFT LANDED 1225
ARRIVED 1232
May 8, 2017, 7:56 am
#11
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: LHR/ATH
Programs: Amex Platinum, LH SEN (Gold), BA Bronze
Posts: 4,489
Well lets be honest here, the food in GC is much worse than other dining establishments at T5, so you would only be eating in GC to 'save money' = ), especially if you are flying Y as you cannot rely on being well fed on board!
May 8, 2017, 7:59 am
#12
Join Date: Sep 2013
Programs: BAEC Gold, EK Skywards (enhanced Blue !), Oman Air Sindbad Gold
Posts: 6,399
OP is perfectly correct as regards the food offerings at BA's lounge at AMS. In that respect, it truly is dire. Indeed, if the lounge disappeared completely I do wonder how many people would actually lament its loss ..... ? (plane-spotters perhaps, for it doth indeed have fine tarmac views)
I would advise maybe a quick stop-off there for a coffee, and then shelling out some cash on decent food - should any be needed - in the main concourse ; especially as the area closest to the lounge is rather attractive. I recall a particularly impressive travel bookstall too.
An alternative would be to pay for access to the far superior Aspire lounge a minute or so from BA's. (and of course if flying out on say, QR, then you can use Aspire anyway).
I would advise maybe a quick stop-off there for a coffee, and then shelling out some cash on decent food - should any be needed - in the main concourse ; especially as the area closest to the lounge is rather attractive. I recall a particularly impressive travel bookstall too.
An alternative would be to pay for access to the far superior Aspire lounge a minute or so from BA's. (and of course if flying out on say, QR, then you can use Aspire anyway).
May 8, 2017, 8:01 am
#13
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 5,596
Not sure where the 50 minutes comes from? It was 31 minutes late pushing back, and arrived 32 minutes late at T5.
Results from https://www.ExpertFlyer.com
Results from https://www.ExpertFlyer.com
Code:
Flight Status Search:
Departing on 08/05/17
Flying BA flight 431
Flight Status Depart Location Depart Date Reliability Arrive Location Arrive Date
AMS Scheduled: 08/05/17 11:40 AM LHR Scheduled: 08/05/17 12:00 PM
BA 431 Landed Term: Estimated: 08/05/17 12:11 PM 71% / 16m Term: 5 Estimated: 08/05/17 12:32 PM
Gate: Actual: 08/05/17 12:11 PM Gate: Actual: 08/05/17 12:32 PM
Baggage: 3
Comments:
"DOBA431/08MAY
* OPERATIONAL FLIGHT INFO * BA 431 0 MO 08MAY17
CITY INFO HOUR (LOCAL)
AMS ESTIMATED TIME OF DEPARTURE 1140
LEFT THE GATE 1211
TOOK OFF 1232
ESTIMATED TIME OF ARRIVAL 1237 LHR
LHR AIRCRAFT LANDED 1225
ARRIVED 1232
May 8, 2017, 8:01 am
#14
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: North of Carlisle
Programs: BAEC Silver
Posts: 1,538
Not sure where the 50 minutes comes from? It was 31 minutes late pushing back, and arrived 32 minutes late at T5.
Results from https://www.ExpertFlyer.com
Results from https://www.ExpertFlyer.com
Code:
Flight Status Search:
Departing on 08/05/17
Flying BA flight 431
Flight Status Depart Location Depart Date Reliability Arrive Location Arrive Date
AMS Scheduled: 08/05/17 11:40 AM LHR Scheduled: 08/05/17 12:00 PM
BA 431 Landed Term: Estimated: 08/05/17 12:11 PM 71% / 16m Term: 5 Estimated: 08/05/17 12:32 PM
Gate: Actual: 08/05/17 12:11 PM Gate: Actual: 08/05/17 12:32 PM
Baggage: 3
Comments:
"DOBA431/08MAY
* OPERATIONAL FLIGHT INFO * BA 431 0 MO 08MAY17
CITY INFO HOUR (LOCAL)
AMS ESTIMATED TIME OF DEPARTURE 1140
LEFT THE GATE 1211
TOOK OFF 1232
ESTIMATED TIME OF ARRIVAL 1237 LHR
LHR AIRCRAFT LANDED 1225
ARRIVED 1232
May 8, 2017, 8:03 am
#15
Ambassador, British Airways; FlyerTalk Posting Legend
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Leeds, UK
Programs: BA GGL/CCR, GfL, HH Diamond
Posts: 42,944
