Jokes to play on BMI Employees?

Old Oct 18, 06, 12:56 am
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Jokes to play on BMI Employees?

There's a superb thread on the UA forum about jokes to play on UA employees:

http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/showthread.php?t=609460

What jokes should we play on BMI employees? Well here's a starter:

Invite a BMI employee to dinner at your house. When they arrive, give them a small tube of pringles and explain that no hot meals have been loaded today, only drinks and confectionary. Charge them for the pringles but only accept exact change and no credit card because the cost is below 5.


As an OT aside, I have worked out how to get a cup of tea when the only change I have is a 20 note! Buy the a bottle of the overly sweet champers plus the cup of tea and pay by credit card!
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Old Oct 18, 06, 3:46 am
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Let them settle down for a post-dinner nap. Five minutes later, wake them up to sell them train tickets.......
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Old Oct 18, 06, 3:51 am
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haha thanks for the laugh this early in the morning , thats classic
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Old Oct 18, 06, 3:53 am
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Here's one........ how about just give them a break.........they do their job as best they can lead by blind misguided management!
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Old Oct 18, 06, 4:01 am
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Naah thats not as funny !!!
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Old Oct 18, 06, 5:04 am
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Let your guests into your hall, then make the following announcement:

"Dinner will be delayed due to the late arrival of the incoming ingredients"
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Old Oct 18, 06, 6:12 am
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Send all of them invitations round to you house for dinner. Make sure some of the invitations are obscurely marked as 'tiny'. Before dinner starts, invite the ones without tiny invitations into your lounge, leaving the others outside. Then let the ones without choose which seats they want, while you randomly pick the ones for the 'tiny' guests.
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Old Oct 18, 06, 7:47 am
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When your guests arrive, tell them that due to technical problems with your dining table, the dinner has been cancelled and give them the address of three other friends they can go to to get dinner.

Alternatively, put a rickety table and tired chairs in your garage, and tell them that due to technical problem with the dining table, dinner will be served on a leased table with a slightly different service.
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Old Oct 18, 06, 7:59 am
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Charge people receiving included food but then change your food option; in stead of food it is now pay per food item when they arrive. If they disagree, do not comply. If they are a frequent guest at dinner, only give a small rebate if they protest loudly enough and threaten to go to your neighbours for dinner from now on...

(I promised myself if I were to participate in one of these it wouldn't be about food)
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Old Oct 18, 06, 8:25 am
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Invite them round for an Indian, then send them round to a bearded friend's when your oven develops a long-term, technical fault.
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Old Oct 18, 06, 12:53 pm
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1. Invite guests to dinner at an obscure location.
2. Rearrange the time repeatedly until no-one can be bothered to come any more.
3. Cancel the dinner, blaming your guests.

Repeat as required.
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Old Oct 18, 06, 1:15 pm
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When inviting guests round for dinner offer them the option to bring either a bottle of wine, or half a bottle and five pounds...
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Old Oct 18, 06, 2:04 pm
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Originally Posted by aisle seat c
Here's one........ how about just give them a break.........they do their job as best they can lead by blind misguided management!
bmi management are also bmi employees!
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Old Oct 18, 06, 5:27 pm
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I'd like to change the title to "jokes to play on BMI Management and Marketing Department", so to these guests:

Give them an appreciation present of 4 gift vouchers for a free upgrade to luxury jacuzzi suite with any booking at a UK Travelodge (with some small print noting that Travelodges near EDI, MAN, EMA, LHW and BRU will provide a free 'breakfast in the bag' as an alternative to the upgrade).
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Old Oct 18, 06, 7:32 pm
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For the people who have never been over to dinner tell them they'll need a keycard to get to the house, only welcome them when they get to the kitchen. You'll only bother to go and meet your regular friends at the front door.

For your friends coming from Washington tell them you are having dinner in your luxury W1 five bedroom apartment with great views over Hyde Park. When they arrive tell them that because only two other friends are coming you are going to a rented garage in Brixton.
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