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How to comfort a loved one losing status?

How to comfort a loved one losing status?

Old Jan 29, 20, 11:44 pm
  #1  
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Talking How to comfort a loved one losing status?

My girlfriend, an eight year EXP, dropped to PLT last year, and will be no status this coming year. (She quit her corporate job in 2018 to start her own business). She's going on a girl's trip to LAS in the morning, and she asked me today why her upgrade hadn't cleared. I don't know how to break it to her, that, Babe, it isn't going to.

We pay for F or J when traveling together, but she, oddly, is ok going in Y alone. IOW, she won't pay for F for herself, but she was so spoiled by EXP, she got used to thinking she was gonna get upgraded. I'm laughing on the inside, but in the interest of maintaining the peace, I'm crying for her pain on the outside. Any advice, Flyertalkers?
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Last edited by NotDuncan; Jan 30, 20 at 12:27 am Reason: spelling
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Old Jan 30, 20, 12:26 am
  #2  
 
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Bummer... but sounds like she realizes some of the perks (comp upgrade 99% of the time) aren't currently what they were a decade ago.
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Old Jan 30, 20, 1:55 am
  #3  
 
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Originally Posted by NotDuncan View Post
My girlfriend, an eight year EXP, dropped to PLT last year, and will be no status this coming year. (She quit her corporate job in 2018 to start her own business). She's going on a girl's trip to LAS in the morning, and she asked me today why her upgrade hadn't cleared. I don't know how to break it to her, that, Babe, it isn't going to.

We pay for F or J when traveling together, but she, oddly, is ok going in Y alone. IOW, she won't pay for F for herself, but she was so spoiled by EXP, she got used to thinking she was gonna get upgraded. I'm laughing on the inside, but in the interest of maintaining the peace, I'm crying for her pain on the outside. Any advice, Flyertalkers?
If the trip is indeed in January, she is still EXP, albeit being several others based on EQD.

Alas, that is the only piece of good news I have for her.
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Old Jan 30, 20, 2:11 am
  #4  
 
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Its....it aint easy. I also once lost status. I went from being Chairmans Preferred to..just nothing. Just a Dividend Miles member. The pain is real. It hurts man, when you board and you have to sit behind the curtain instead of in front of it. Walking past 1st class, hating each pax more then the last. Last week, Mini bottles of gin. This week..Dasani Sparkle. You go to parties and every story is....I USED to have status, I used to fly a lot, I used to be a big deal. Youre at the airport, thinking people in the pre✅ line will care that you USED to be Elite. But they dont. They dont care that youve been there & know what youre talking about..not at the gate, not at the counter, nowhere. Its lonely and cruel and cold.

This is a Mars/Venus thing. Dont try to fix it...just listen and acknowledge like you have a bag of F to give...

Fortunately, Im platinum now and will be EXP by the fall, where I wont have to be bothered with such people and interface with the great unwashed...
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Old Jan 30, 20, 2:11 am
  #5  
 
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Originally Posted by rumboj View Post
If the trip is indeed in January, she is still EXP, albeit being several others based on EQD.

Alas, that is the only piece of good news I have for her.
PLT.
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Old Jan 30, 20, 2:20 am
  #6  
 
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Being a free agent one can shop for the best deal. If it bothers her that she has no status and she wants at least Plat, then tell her to buy a CX PE mileage run when the next NA sale comes round. I am dropping from Plat to nothing in a few days, but I got lots out of it on other One world carriers while it lasted.
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Old Jan 30, 20, 6:57 am
  #7  
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I'd say this unless you are a CK or at least a mid level spend EXP prepare to sit in the back, a lot. I'm a mid spend PP with 3 flights on Saturday, including one in the evening, and right now it doesn't look like I will be sitting up front on any of them. It's coming down to if you really want F and not in one of the aforementioned groups, pay for F.
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Old Jan 30, 20, 7:31 am
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sounds like she is fine letting op pay for F or J, but not yet comfortable asking op to pay for a solo flight.
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Old Jan 30, 20, 9:17 am
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She could check if she has a buy back offer to keep PLT.
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Old Jan 30, 20, 9:18 am
  #10  
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Originally Posted by Austin787 View Post
She could check if she has a buy back offer to keep PLT.
Don't be an enabler of status addiction.
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Old Jan 30, 20, 9:28 am
  #11  
 
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Originally Posted by NotDuncan View Post
and she asked me today why her upgrade hadn't cleared. I don't know how to break it to her, that, Babe, it isn't going to.
Tell her that Santa was bringing it but his sleigh went mx, so you are trying to reach the tooth fairy to see if you can fix the situation...

Seriously, its time to tell her that the upgrade fairy is not real and explain where the upgrades come from...
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Last edited by nk15; Jan 30, 20 at 9:41 am
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Old Jan 30, 20, 9:29 am
  #12  
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Originally Posted by joeyE View Post
Its....it aint easy. I also once lost status. I went from being Chairmans Preferred to..just nothing. Just a Dividend Miles member. The pain is real. It hurts man, when you board and you have to sit behind the curtain instead of in front of it. Walking past 1st class, hating each pax more then the last. Last week, Mini bottles of gin. This week..Dasani Sparkle. You go to parties and every story is....I USED to have status, I used to fly a lot, I used to be a big deal. Youre at the airport, thinking people in the pre✅ line will care that you USED to be Elite. But they dont. They dont care that youve been there & know what youre talking about..not at the gate, not at the counter, nowhere. Its lonely and cruel and cold.

This is a Mars/Venus thing. Dont try to fix it...just listen and acknowledge like you have a bag of F to give...

Fortunately, Im platinum now and will be EXP by the fall, where I wont have to be bothered with such people and interface with the great unwashed...
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Old Jan 30, 20, 9:45 am
  #13  
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Los Angeles
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Been there.
IT IS OK.
Actually, it is liberating as...
- You only fly when you have to (no more chasing status or having spreadsheets tracking EQMs EQDs)
- Take the most convenient flights (not the AA or OW Flight)
- Less time in the air, more time at home with loved ones. Anybody values that?
- Experience new aircraft, hubs, crews
- Read the editorials by Munoz or Bastian on "Hemispheres" or "Sky"
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Old Jan 30, 20, 9:49 am
  #14  
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
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Well.... you are in a pickle..I see you have status for life time...
oh the way this would probably work, is that let her get a few flights under her belt.. she may or may not, be happy, I think just reminding her that the flights are not really long.
and that there are lots and lots of passenger that fly coach all the time.. Heck even EXP have to fly coach sometimes.. (me)
ok, at this she will probably take it out on you little, however, she might remember the days was she was building to EXP, and that may help.

Good luck
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Old Jan 30, 20, 10:22 am
  #15  
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
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Other approaches include focusing on the positive, like that she still has free MCE and bag until the 31st...
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