Covid at a Novotel or when a 2x upgrade feels like a downgrade
 

Earlier today I've checked in at Novotel Poznań Centrum. I booked a standard double room and got an upgrade to an executive room on the 15th floor.
So most people would say that I should be quite happy about a double upgrade (there are also 'superior' room at this hotel).

Before booking this stay, I read plenty of reviews and I assume that there won't be daily housekeeping and that I'll probably have to beg the reception for a toiler paper roll on the third day of my stay.
(By the way, the changes to housekeeping have never been communicated to me. Neither via email nor at check-in.)

I'm also familiar with the mostly cost-free upgrades offered by many Novotels in Poland when they upgrade you to an executive room, but first they remove anything that you could consume from the minibar. Just in case.

So I wasn't expecting much, but when I got to my room, it turned out that getting a double upgrade felt like being downgraded to ibis standards.
The only element that a standard novotel room wouldn't have was the view from the 15th floor. At least, I have a perfect overview of the construction site next to the hotel.

Bathrobe and slippers? No. They are dangerous.
Nespresso machine? Nope. It's a health risk.
Free minibar? Hell, no! In fact, the minibar was empty and LOCKED so that nobody could use it.

I can't understand why the electric kettle, the telephone, the open box of tissue and the ironing board haven't been removed.

If I had known all this before, I would have booked a room at the ibis which operates in the same building. What's the point of paying 25% more if you don't get anything/much in return?

If Accor in Poland doesn't find a better way of running their hotels during the pandemic, I may as well decide to make my first airbnb booking later this year.
I really like my water cold and can't stand instant coffee.

[UPDATE:]
Some 4 hours later, after a quick discussion with the receptionist and a long walk around Poznań, I'm back in my room.
The minibar has been unlocked and filled with some random items. A Nespresso machine has been brought, too!

And no Apple ? :D

No apple.
No welcome gift either.
I'll try to use my welcome drinks voucher tomorrow - maybe they will serve me some apple juice? ;)

By the way, the minibar battle was just a partial victory. I can use the minibar as a reading lamp, but it won't produce any cold air.

But does it generate any hot air? If so, that's an Accor specialty... the ability to generate vast amounts of hot air while serving no other useful purpose.

I'm sure if you look at your profile you will see that you have the Random Items box checked in your minibar preferences list