Been there, done that.

Spackman,

You'll have to have patience to do it. Not sure where you are coming from? For me, starting on the East Coast made it much easier since you can look through many different routes to get there.

The difficult part it getting over the water, so think of all the potential starting places for the FF programs that you have access too and then all the potential destination cities (hint: Honolulu is not the only airport in Hawaii).

Sounds like one of your main challenges may be the multiple seats it sounds like you will need.

I've used AMEX Membership Miles point transfers to gain access to rarely-used FF accounts (e.g., Hawaiian Airlines -- BTW, they are very nice and will take the time to look through multiple dates, multiple originating and destination cities).

Know up front that you will likely encounter many FF desks who laugh in your face or who are rude about aiding in your search for seats... and this will definitely take you time, but if you are persistent there is always a way.