FlyerTalk Forums - View Single Post - The Liquid and ONE Bag rule from a LHR Goon
Old Apr 27, 07, 4:16 pm
  #104  
LHRGoon
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 10
I think i'm the effigy of every security guard you've ever met.

Roughly 15,000 passengers on average travel through the terminal I work at a day. I only work half a day, but am usually at one of the most busy areas. During my 6 month stint I have grown the unfortunate habit of slowly being more prejudiced towards some passengers....

Americans.

On the day of the OP I encountered the worst American passenger and was seething because of it. I was in one of 3 places I could be posted. The day was slow and I was by myself. Bored out of my brains I decided, why not converse with fellow passengers. An American couple walked by, we talked about the weather, about the silly rules and about politics. I asked who they were going to vote for in the Primary's, Hilary or Obama, forgetting that some people vote Republican. They said that actually they were Republicans, but with the current situation a change was probably in order. Chuffed at my first foray into conversing with passengers for a long time I decided to continue.

Next passenger comes along. She's American. I decide to continue with the politics line, changing my questions to not be so biased. "Excuse me madam, I hope you don't mind me asking, but are you a Republican or Democrat?". She looks shell shocked. I look mystified. "What concern is it of yours?", storms to ticket inspection and promptly demands to talk to my supervisor. This really irked me. You try and make their trip through security more humane and friendly, only to be accused of - i'm not too sure.

A question to FTers. Is there something offensive about asking of ones political allegiance?

Also, why don't the majority of American passengers understand "Sorry sir, your bag looks quite large. Could you use the side handle [points] and put the bag in horizontally so that it goes in the gauge sideways. It can't be taller than the gauge [points at the top of the gauge].

5 reasons America is annoying. - in no order and off my head.

They believe in Evolution.
They don't treat their incarcerated with respect.
They assassinated Iran's first democratically elected president.
They're threatening Iran and want to impose a democratically elected president.
They elected George Bush.
They elected George Bush.

El Al.

El Al has a separate entrance through security. They think it's because they're important, we know it's because we're scared. 30 min before their special entrance opens 3 armed police cars pull up outside the terminal, 2 police men patrol the balcony facing the entrance, one is deployed at ticket inspection and a few are scattered out front, they look down their gun sights periodically at nothing.

Anyway, there's the background. I'm nervous. They're also the most uncooperative people on earth. They rank just behind C/J passengers. Everything is religious; Everything is not fit for the hold. We ask, how large is it? They mumble. They take it out their bag and it's the size of a small book. But they need that massive bag to put it in.

When no liquids were allowed, I had a couple who read the rules and decided that to take through their soup they were supposed to freeze it.

Disclaimer.

This thread may yet again be hi jacked by militant posters - this time claiming antisemitism. Yes, i've read Lombardo or Milgram and do know that Jews have a problem with authority. It's a good thing, blah blah; the slow erosion of our human rights. It just makes my job a lot harder.

Stroppy smart young female business passengers.

"Sorry Madam, are you aware that you have.." They snap, saying "I know, i'll do it". They get asked roughly 8 times before they reach the end of the queue. Reason being, 8 of us work the queue independently, we are obliged to ask when we see two bags. "Why do you keep bloody asking me?" - "Because you got two bags [you stupid ......]"

The French.

After telling her what she has to do. She's carrying a tiny expensive handbag with very elegant leather laptop bag. "Have you read Satre?". Stern Look. "Madam. I'm British, I read Russell."(Not really knowing why Russell aptly counters Satre nor caring.)

They're also oh so cute when they get angry. They get angry a lot. A pretty lady passenger got so annoyed at a women fumbling around and holding her up she started an argument in the line with that cute accent. You had to be there I guess...

Northerners.

They've traveled the world over and are now cultured. After a hedonistic sexxed up holiday in Thailand they head back. 12hr flight of free alcohol - they land at LHR and reality kicks in. Through FCC. .... Kicked out. 2 bottles of whiskey and 2 bags. They proceed to check in.

Once they get to me, they're a sight to behold.

Muslims.

The best passengers to deal with. Ever. Ask them to do something you're sure would annoy anyone and they'll do it. This might, as some would say, because they're embarrassed and think we blame them about these silly security rules, but I really believe they're just not bothered by them.

Russians.

A free Russian lesson every time. JJJUUUUTKIISTE. VOOoDA?

Always have mountain loads of duty free. When asked to check in they simply state "but I am flying to Moscow?" They hand gesture a bag being checked in and it either disappearing or exploding. They sometimes say "money?" like it's a common occurance at an airport to bribe.

Clarifications.

In Europe, the passenger bag matching rule has been around for a long time following a Pan Am aircraft exploding over a small Scottish town called Lockerbie.

LHR was the first to scan every single bag on a plane. Either checked in or carried on.

Are there "public accessible" sizers in the terminal (preferably near the check-in counters) for us to check if our bags will fit within them and get them checked there before having to make you and us waste more time rejecting it and sending us back?
They're everywhere.

WRONG!

From Wikipedia:
Whoops.

Last Dec. LHR had something like 10,000 (or more) bags piled up after a sorting belt disaster exacerbated by fog problems. I had checked my bag due to my transit via LHR and the 1-bag rule. I didn't see my bag for 3.5 weeks causing me considerable inconvenience and expense for which I have not been (and apparently will not be) full reimbursed. Do I want to risk that again if I can possibly avoid it? No thanks. I recently cancelled 2 trips to the UK that I didn't have to make because I choose not to participate in the stupidity.
The baggage handlers, for some reason, were really happy at all the extra work. Most applied for overtime.

They move around each terminal and snoop at the passengers to make sure they only have one bag when they go through the security machines. If there are "non compliant" passengers then the airport gets fined.
If the number of bags are monitored airside Mr. Goon -

(i) Why do I see so many passengers with 2 or 3 bags?
(ii) Why did I see a family go through LGW last week - past the ICTS and security staff with three big bags, a handbag, diaper bag and stroller?
My posts are quite long and I don't really read through them again. The DofT only care when the one bags goes through the security machines. Once past you are allowed to take them out. ICTS is the company that used to do the FCC. They were fired for being incompetent.

Moeve.

hehe

I'm pretty sure the insults have slowed down a little. Hope this isn't rocking the boat a little...

Bonus brownie point:
What Terminal do I work at?

Last edited by LHRGoon; Apr 27, 07 at 7:48 pm Reason: This ajax edit thing is really nice.
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