Thanks guys.
I called and spoke to the night shift. The first lady was just clueless and was suggesting flights that departed before my delayed flight to EWR got in. I had a hard time understanding her as well. I was on hold for a long time so I didn't want a HUCA. I politely asked to speak to a supervisor and things went much better.
I had looked at all the options you suggested but they were firm they wouldn't use Aer Lingus which was the only alternative itinerary I was interested in. We couldn't split into smaller groups as the other three on the party were my minor kids. They offered standby on flights to DUB from EWR but I was not motivated to try that as a weekend in EWR was not appealing. The best confirmed option for 4 in economy was to depart Sunday, arrive Monday. That's after the event on Sunday night I was trying to make it to so in the end I changed to flights leaving Tuesday, still in first/business. We are going for a month so loss of 6 days is unfortunate but not the end of the world.
I appreciate everyone's help.