kitkatft

I'm trying to book a "winter getaway."

Preferably with saver AA/UA points available as a 1-stop through a warm-weather hub (so nonstops from DFW, IAH, MIA, or maybe CLT) to avoid travel nuisances, but we'd consider other destinations if we happen to find a good cash price (e.g. LAX and CUN and ATL and MIA really shouldn't be too expensive to get to, period).

Criteria for a place to stay are are:

• PRIVATE AND QUIET. This is intended to be a "romantic, secluded, open-air couples getaway." Like, turn off the electronics and stare at the ocean, frolic in the water if it's warm enough, and have a lot of "couples time."
  • This VRBO Curacao property's constant repetition of the phrases "look at the day bed on the porch!" "privacy walls!" "couples only!" "tranquil!" kind of got me thinking that ... ahem ... outdoors with an amazing view and no creepy bugs but insane amounts of privacy and somewhere soft and clean and sized for two would be ... particularly awesome ... if you catch my drift.
  • Property managers are fine and can be charming ... sometimes ... but ... you know ... "alone time" without wondering if they're just around the corner is kind of what we'd be going for here!
  • (That said, it doesn't need to be so remote that it'd be dangerous in the case of a water accident. Just ... the property itself has ... private ... nooks!)
• Easy travel from the northern US (so, Caribbean and Central America / Mexico and maybe Hawaii -- even the Alabama coast, Florida Coast, Georgia Coast, etc. are possible options, and Southern California is definitely also an option if there are any private places affordable out there)
• Under $200-$250/night (including taxes, cleaning fees, other fees without which you really wouldn't want to stay at the place, etc) for something "a bit ordinary" (like the US mainland coast); our maximum budget (once taxes, fees, "airport rides" and "rent a car on the property from the owner" that you really can't enjoy the property without, etc. are accounted for) is $400/night (and even then, we could only afford to stay 3 nights, so travel convenience would be important).
  • Basically, we have a $1,000 accommodation budget, give or take, but would love to stay well under that if we don't need to go over it.
  • In other words, I'm not paying $400/night for the Alabama Riviera or to share a beach with 50 million people in the Yucatan, but if getting to Curacao had been easier, I wouldn't be posting this thread; I'd have booked that property I linked to by now.
• Luxuriously warm weather and water would be superb, but for the right "mood" with the property itself, we'd definitely consider somewhere that's more like "throw on your jacket and go for a walk along the beach in 65-degree weather" comfortable (like the Gulf Coast or parts of the Pacific like Southern California), not "throw on your bikini and a snorkel all day" tropical.
• Quiet at night. No discotheques or margarita bars blaring music past my (early) bedtime.
• We're okay doing our own cooking. No need for all-inclusives or anything. We're not drinkers and we usually like our own food better than hotel food anyway, so "whatever" about food & drink. While being able to rent a kayak for a peaceful paddle might be fun, no need to "swim with the dolphins" at some sort of shticky thing. This trip is intended to be about warm breezes, meditation, maybe warm water, and maybe some colorful fish if that happens to be nearby, too.
• Not mosquito-ridden in January-March. Partner is a mosquito magnet. Yes, I know, the tropics ... but some places have nicer breezes and drier weather/landscaping than others.
• Not cockroach/lizard/fire-ant/etc.-ridden. (Life Hack: Do NOT stay in a romantic "treehouse" hotel room in the tropics. You are NOT the only creature living in a tree that night...)
• Not miserable to try to get to from whatever airport our 1-stop lands in out of our "US gateway" city. I don't want to have to rent a special type of SUV to get over the roads; I don't want to have to worry about damaging a car I'm driving or going down super-dangerous cliff roads filled with super-dangerous drivers; I don't want to have to charter a super-expensive ferry or private boat or private flight or whatever, etc.
  • Like ... the whole budget, including airfare and food, is about $2,500-ish for 2 people doing 3-6 nights "somewhere relaxing and not at home," with more like 5-6 nights intended unless the place is "once-in-a-lifetime" nice. I mean, we can always just go to Tampa or Miami or something and rent an affordable condo 2 miles from the sea and rent bikes if we fail to find some sort of mystical "dream getaway" like I'm fantasizing of here and we'll have a great time doing that, too ... no need to leave the mainland and lose time traveling for "okay, that was kind of nice.")
• Facing west is a bonus ... I'm pretty partial to sunsets. But not necessary.
• On the beach / safely walkable to the beach is strongly preferable, but it kind of depends on the beach itself, the area, etc. In a country with potential strife/interpersonal crime, on the beach so we barely have to leave once we're there seems like a good idea. On the other hand, we once went to Hawaii and stayed in a residential neighborhood in a friend's utility room, and that wasn't horrible (because it was free, among other things) ... for all the right other amenities (say, the place low-mosquito and overlooking the beach on top of a cliff, and you really need to get in your car and drive down to the beach if you want to actually swim, but it's otherwise everything we're looking for), that's acceptable if parking at nearby beaches is available and affordable and if the property still has that "secluded romantic time in fresh air" feeling ... not just "oh, hey, someone's apartment in an 'affordable' complex."
• The beach we'd be primarily enjoying is sand, not rock, and is a reasonably safe current (the middle of this picture intimidates me a bit; where those people are playing in the water near that rock terrifies me), if the water's warm enough to really enjoy playing in for a long time (as opposed to just walking along).
• The property feels clean and safe and relaxing and "just right." Not moldy / mouse-poop-ey. Not stained up. And I mean ... I did just ask for a "romantic" place. ... No evidence that anyone else has ever been "romantic" there would be good.

I'm combing VRBO and hotel sites etc. etc. etc. but it's not like there's a shortage of beachfront accommodations in this hemisphere. So yes, I'm doing my research!

Looking more for "Oh, hey, we stayed at this great place!" personal recommendations if my "dream description" happens to remind anyone of anywhere they've been.

Thanks so much!