You cannot add an AU online, you must call the number on the back of your card, and the request will get forwarded to your banker who will gather the required information from you. I got what looked like a form letter email when I added my wife as an AU. It asked for SSN, photo of an ID (passport/DL/etc), Mother's Maiden Name, etc. Oddly he wanted me to email this... to which I said no way in hell am I sending this data unencrypted, I'm going to give it to you over the phone.
You likely didn't get in on time if it's based on date of approval. If it's based on date of application, you'll be fine. They use Fedex Priority Overnight - my card was sent from TSYS in Georgia on a Tuesday night immediately following approval, and it showed up in the Pacific Northwest the very next morning around 11am. They didn't spare any expense on this part.
Spend on the AU cards counts towards minimum spend. I physically got the card on 7/20-ish or so, and as far as I can tell, there's no indicator to show how close you are to meeting the minimum spend for the bonus.