Here’s one about a DYKWIA who is also a ICTAPFAFASIJBAJTE (I can’t tell a pilot from a flight attendant so I’ll just be a jerk to everyone). The pure ignoramusity (new word) of this kind of stuff underwhelms me. This, from my First Officer and close friend on a recent flight she was flying:

“In uniform (because pilots wear pilot uniforms) I walk on to the plane and in to the flight deck while the passengers are boarding. My captain is doing the walk around. During my preflight, a first class passenger walked up to the cockpit door:

Pax: Excuse me
Me: Yes sir, how may I help you?
Pax: What are you doing?
Me: I am doing the preflight cockpit setup. Do you need help with something?
Pax: Yes! I need my beverage but you are dilly dallying up here and not doing your job! I am tired of lazy flight attendants!
Me: Well, I am your pilot, sir. I will be flying you to KXXX today. Can you wait a minute for that drink?

He spins around and walks out.

What century are we in, again?

FAB