You do realize that you are trying to apply logic to the behaviour of people who are being herded down a cattle chute into an enclosed space that isn't big enough for everyone to comfortably fit into.

Expectations should always be line with reality. Expecting airplane boarding to be a smooth process regardless of how you do it is simply an unrealistic expectation. Flying is not a pleasant experience and is never likely to change for the better.

Personally, I always wait for 'last call for boarding flight XXX' to be called. When everyone else is on and I am one of the last to board. I don't do carry-on at all, couldn't care less about rushing to secure space in an overhead bin (how bourgeois can you get). My attitude is a bit like, 'OK, have all you kiddies done with your childish behavoiur and settled down now? Good, now I will get on the plane.' But even then, I am just making the best of a bad situation.

Oh how I wish someone would invent a 'beam me up Scotty' device that got you to your destination in seconds. But even then, there would be line-ups. ;-)