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Worst Passenger of the Week

Worst Passenger of the Week: “Nothing Holy Spirit About This Airline, Y’all Need to Quit Playing with Jesus”

Worst Passenger of the Week: “Nothing Holy Spirit About This Airline, Y’all Need to Quit Playing with Jesus”
Jeff Edwards

Every Friday, FlyerTalk looks back at the week’s most charming individuals. While there are always plenty of contenders for our Worst Passenger of the Week award, only one lucky flyer can take home the glory. Here are this week’s winners.

Honorable Mentions – The Losers in Love

This week, a Michigan teenager fell short in his attempt to earn free airfare to Newfoundland to see his long-distance girlfriend. Air Canada had promised the lovelorn romantic a free roundtrip flight if his tweet earned a retweet for every resident of the distant Canadian providence.

Unfortunately, Twitter user C.J. Poirier only managed to gain around 30,000 retweets, not the 530,000 required for the trip to see his sweetheart. Still, Poirier wasn’t this week’s biggest loser in love – not by a long shot.

A passenger who reportedly added his girlfriend’s pet name on her ticket at the time of booking, soon learned the hard way that Finnair officials at Zurich Airport (ZHR) are fairly serious about international boarding passes being unaltered and matching a passenger’s name.

It turns out the issue was not easily corrected.

When the less-than-impressed companion learned that it was too late to adjust the documents in time to make her flight to Japan (and worse yet, the entire itinerary would need to be rebooked for the following day at walkup prices), she became overwhelmed by her beau’s romantic gesture and passed out at the ticket counter.

Third Place – The Masked Bandit

A mischievous raccoon managed to delay an Air Canada flight for more than seven hours this week at Saskatoon John G. Diefenbaker International Airport (YXE). The pesky ring-tailed beast reportedly climbed into the inner-working of the aircraft through an air vent attached to ground equipment servicing the plane.

According to Air Canada officials, the plane had to be partially disassembled in order to coax the trespassing critter to depart. Airline employees told reporters that it was unlikely that the raccoon had arrived with the aircraft on a previous flight, but had instead entered the plane once it landed. Ramp workers, however, report that raccoons are not normally found in that area of the airport.

“Our crews worked with the animal control experts to extricate the animal which was unharmed,” Air Canada spokeswoman Angela Mah told CTV. “This is the first time we’re aware of such an incident.”

The Runner-up – Packing Hot Pink Heat at Airport Security

Recent finds by the TSA seem to indicate pink is definitely the new black when it comes to handheld weapons at the airport. A passenger was arrested at Richmond International Airport (RIC) when she arrived at an airport security checkpoint armed with a loaded semi-automatic handgun this week. The weapon was unlikely to escape the notice of TSA as it was described as “hot pink with eight pink-tipped bullets.”

Only a few days earlier, TSA screeners confiscated a hot pink “bedazzled 3-million-volt lipstick stun gun” from a passenger at San Diego International Airport (SAN). Airport screeners are trained to find and identify hidden weapons of every sort smuggled by passengers at checkpoints, but this latest fashion trend in bright pink personal protection can’t help but to make the job easier.

The TSA, nearly every week, issues a reminder to air travelers that while stun guns and in many cases, hand guns can be transported in approved checked bags, bringing a weapon to a security checkpoint can cause big legal problems up to and including civil penalties and arrest – no matter how “on fleek” the weapon in question might be.

The Winner – The Wrong Sort of Spirit

Very few Spirit Airlines passengers are likely to confuse the airline with a holy endeavor, but an agitated flyer recently took the carrier to task in dramatic fashion for misappropriating the term “spirit.” While Safira Allen’s critique of the airline’s distinct lack of spirituality might have made for an extraordinarily funny Yelp review, the evangelizing passenger decided instead to post her thoughts on Facebook Live as the flight boarded.

When a flight attendant arrived at Allen’s seat to tell her that she had been denied boarding for undisclosed reasons, the passenger instead filmed a fiery sermon about the airline’s godlessness. According to the disgruntled passenger, she had already been denied a seat on two other Spirit flights earlier that day.

“I’m not getting off this plane,” Allen can be heard telling a crew member prior to the Hartsfield–Jackson Atlanta International Airport (ATL) to Las Vegas McCarran International Airport (LAS)-bound flight. “Girl let me share this because this not right. How are y’all going to inconvenience me? I get on the plane and y’all are telling me I have to get off? No. Not today I’m not.”

Eventually, all of the passengers on the plane were asked to return to the gate – leaving Allen as the sole remaining passenger on the flight. Before police arrived to escort the orating passenger from the aircraft, she managed to cut straight to the heart of the airline’s wicked behavior in an 18-minute long Facebook Live post which has since been viewed by more than three million people.

“Y’all going to use Jesus’ name the Holy Spirit?” she asks rhetorically early in the video. “No that’s got to change. Y’all need to be called something else. Y’all need to change y’all’s name, because nothing is Holy Spirit about this airline. No, but y’all say ‘y’all represent God, y’all need to quit playing with Jesus – and I’m not getting off this plane.”

[Photo: Shutterstock]

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1 Comment

  1. emilio911

    May 12, 2018 at 11:38 am

    Spirit is such a bullshit company.

    How can you be too late to board a plane that’s still at the gate?

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