eightblack

This may not have been such a good idea...

Left this morning at o'dark hundred for the airport, starting out on the first leg of my very first MR, SIN-HKG-SFO-HKG-SIN.

Only 2 of the 4 legs had cleared the upgrade waitlist, but I thought "it's Thanksgiving, surely loads will be light?" I purposely bought a H fare, which is refundable, just in case I chickened out at the last minute.

Wife thinks I'm going to Manila. And anyway, my folks are in town - and she just reckons I'm making up any excuse to get out of the house. Let's leave that for another time...

Anyway, Easy Update starts bleeping at me with the first of several re-timed messages. Flight now delayed out of HKG to SFO due to a late arriving crew from Saigon.

Flight to SFO is originally slated to depart out of HKG at 12noon. Now it's just gone to 3pm. Am drinking heavily in the TG lounge, despite a wonderful turkey on offer over at the RCC.

According to the check-in agent at SIN I was 4th on the upgrade list out of HKG. When I checked with the senior lounge dragon at HKG, still 4th. But she reckons Business has checked in full. Only the Cantonese can deliver news like this with such ferocity that it makes you never want to ask again...

"Lady, if I had a nickel for everytime someone has said that to me, I'd be a very wealthy man..." I thought to myself.

Run away to the TG lounge. Call the US 1K line. Lovely lady reckons I'm mad, says the connection is going to be very tight (apparently, I land in SFO with an hour to clear customs and get back upstairs) but she confirms that J still has more than 9 seats unsold. A glimmer of hope still then as far as the upgrade goes.

I'm sitting here trying to think of my disaster recover plan. I somehow think the flight out of HKG will be delayed even further. Then, Murphy's law will take over and even if I do arrive in time at SFO, 14 flights from Asia will have all landed at the same time and the customs hall will look like Grand Central Station.

Then what to say to the CBP?

"How long are you staying in the US?"
"About 45-mins, less if you stop asking me idiotic questions"
"Really, 45-mins?"
"Yes, doing a Mileage Run"
"A what?" as he reaches to his side to unclip the safety retainer on his 9mm
"A mileage run, you know, to build up status and miles"
"Never heard of it"
"So, you're telling me you just spent 3 hrs from SIN-HKG, then 12+ hours from HKG to SFO and now you're going to turn around and do it all again?"
"Yes, exactly. There you go, I knew you'd understand"
"You're an idiot" Presses button and 5-seconds later, a large man arrives.

Dragged off to a room somewhere in the bowels of SFO airport....(or something like that).

Trip report to follow. Divorce imminent. Probably be homeless by the time I get back to SIN. If I ever get back...

mauiUAflyer

Great post!

But you are mad. It's only Wednesday... the WORST travel day. You have to wait for Thursday, when everyone is already there!

eightblack

Not quite. Remember I started in SIN on my Thanksgiving morning (Thurs) which is your Wed night.

Lady luck is turning. Ran back to RCC. Cranky Old Lounge Lizard has been replaced by someone much nicer. New Business Class Boarding pass waiting for me at reception - 13K (upper deck). Most excellent.

Asked nicer Lounge Lizard about tight connection in SFO, given just over an hour. She then calls out the back and the grumpy one re-appears. Crap.

Both women then proceed to berate me for being a fool and that the connection times are too tight. I try and convince them that I am a good runner. They laugh. Actually, it was more like a snicker. And say something in Cantonese under their breath to each other, which was clearly not complimentary. More snickers.

2 more hours of drinking cheap Chilean wine.

More later...

FriendlySkies

lol

Maybe you'll get a CBP officer that is also on FT

mauiUAflyer

I was wondering if that might not be the case. But still...

Keep us posted!

VTHokieFlyer

I hear ya, back in Jan I did a LGA-IAD-LHR and return leaving on Sat and returning that Sun with like 8 hours in LHR... got stopped in IAD by CBP, they really don't understand what a MR is all about, they held me for like 3 hours while doing background checks on me. I'm sure it didn't help that I use to work for Halliburton in Saudi Arabia, they seriously thought I worked for the CIA and asked me repeatedly if I was with the CIA!

I did a LGA-ORD-LHR-SFO-SYD and return like 6 months before and had no problems with CBP, so go figure...

Good luck with the upgrades, luckily they all cleared at booking for me, I would have never booked them any other way!

koroleon

Maybe you were on this HKG-SFO flight? http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/unite...zeuged-up.html

MR on a H fare, interesting. Not B for the COS bonus and not the lowest fare available.

youreadyfreddie

Proper response to questions of that nature:

"I can tell you, but then I'd have to kill you."

mauiUAflyer

Or maybe more friendly, "you might think that, but I couldn't possibly comment".

eightblack

Apparently, the flight from SGN has just landed. According to .bomb, the reason for the delay was "the crew".



You'd think that they could be a little more specific. What exactly does a crew delay involve?

Did they all go out and get drunk the night before? Did they lose someone between the airport and the hotel? Did one or more of them decide at the last minute to go out and get some cheap cosmetic surgery done - so they would look good for Thanksgiving?

The challenge now is for the airport ground staff to gas up the bird, empty the honey pot and restock the galley with food prepared by the lowest bidder, probably off an island somewhere in the South China Sea.

The Global Services lady in the RCC took pity on me and has printed off my 2 boarding passes (SFO-HKG and HKG-SIN) so I can wave them urgently in front of any non-english speaking person I run into in the SFO customs and arrival area.

The Chilean wine is starting to take the edge off. My liver I think. But I feel calmer. Sort of.

Given that I am on the upper deck, I was thinking of stuffing $50 dollar bills under the cockpit door with a note to the Captain, pleading for him to duct tape the throttles to the forward most position, despite whatever howls of protest from flight operations he might receive...

Then again, I have no desire to be rugby tackled by a FAM. Or worse, a heavy set trolley dolley who has unresolved issues. With someone.

As the famous line in the movies goes...."this is gonna be close..."

Fellow FT'ers. Wish me luck. And as you sit there, stuffing your face, drinking too much and quite possibly ending your day in the mother of all arguments with relatives you don't really like, think of me.

btravel112

best of luck to you on your run. I'll assume that you are going to make it. Have you thought about just saying you are on a mileage run, and going to a bar in order to avoid your family ?

Hopefully your explanation won't sound like you are a drug mule.

azepine00

Good luck to you!
Maybe you'll turn around in HKG declare your MR trip in vain, collect some vouchers and original routing mileage and even spend some quality time in HKG.
Happy Thanksgiving!

LIH Prem

lol, keep posting. hope you make it or don't make it .. whichever you want.

-David

AlaskaAir738

Good luck, thanks for sharing.

Vuelos

This being United, a pear shaped MR could be very revenue positive.