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Quote:
What does it take for you to lose your temper with fellow passengers?
a lot....
having been in a service industry for 30 years, and having taken the brunt of a lot of what people "have to offer" , i have found that no matter how pi$$ed you are....
a) yelling, screaming and losing your temper will not accomplish anything other than make the situation worse
b) keeping a civil tone yet being firm and polite all at the same time is the way to go.
edited to add: that also includes the tsa folks but only until they cross the line with their power trips-where they wish they would never have met me-tho even with that situation, i will still be polite but a he||uva lot more "firm"
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just my humble opinion but i used to try and stop hockey pucks so what do i know . Nighthawks fans are everywhere
When I'd had enough, I turned around and said, "This is an overnight flight. Can you please keep it down?" She replied with something about she has as much rights as me, and I said a bit more loudly: "I am traveling on business. When I land, I need to shower and go directly to a meeting. Therefore, I need to sleep as much as possible NOW. If you would be silent for a few seconds and listen, you would notice the rest of the plane is completely quiet. Take a hint."
I wouldn't have been the noisy chatterer, but if you tried that line on me in other circumstances, you'd have been told in no uncertain terms that your job is your problem, not mine.
One time I got quite angry while traveling: I was sitting at the gate at ATL talking, in low tones, with my companions, and this pompous twit sitting next to us turns around and said "I'm on a business call; y'all need to shut up right now." All three of us told him to take his business call elsewhere, as we were in a public place and free to converse if we wished.
if i got into a fight with everyone who annoyed me whilst travelling, i'd be in jail for manslaughter !
I just close my eyes, focus, take deep breaths and tell myself they just aint worth ruining my holiday over.
I would only ever step in physically if i were physically threatened or if people were running amok drunk on a plane and the cabin crew had lost all control.
It's funny you mention this. I train in boxing and Muay thai and have done martial arts all my life. I also have an instructor who is our area's leading expert on security training. He teaches prison officers, bouncers etc etc. I train reality combat and defence with him. Only the other day we were training on combat in confined areas. How to strike from a seated position etc.
IF someone needs and deserves a good verbal bashing (someone jumped the line etc), i'd get my girlfriend to give them a verbal bashing. She's a petite little thing but can get very fiery. That way there is little chance of physical escalation. Of course if anyone even started to attempt to lay a finger on her, i'd step in and KTFO ! but yeah you want to avoid physical confrontations where possible.
One instance that comes to mind was a trip from ORD-BOS with my then-gf (now wife) to visit some friends. She had the window, I had the middle, chivalrous fellow that I am. Once we reached cruising altitude, I reclined my seat partially (I rarely recline all the way, and I ALWAYS do so slowly after sneaking a peek behind me). The man sitting behind me didn't say anything, but who I assume to have been his wife in the aisle started muttering under her breath something about rude passengers reclining their seats and encroaching in their space.
I turned around and asked if everything was ok, to which she replied that everything was fine. Upon turning around, she started muttering under her breath yet again, but this time with more colorful language. Again, I turned around, this time asking if there was a problem and that, if so, she should let me know. I was met with a civil, if not polite, rebuff once again. A third time, she muttered under her breath ramblings along the same lines. Finally, I turned around and told her in no uncertain terms that if she has a problem, to be forthright with me rather than doing this passive-aggressive muttering, and that her husband - who hadn't said a word the entire time - was the one directly behind me anyway and didn't seem to mind, so what was her problem.
The rest of the flight was extremely peaceful (for me and my gf, at least).
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CDTraveler
I wouldn't have been the noisy chatterer, but if you tried that line on me in other circumstances, you'd have been told in no uncertain terms that your job is your problem, not mine.
Sorry, I disagree. I subscribe to the Star Trek mantra: The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one. If it's an overnight flight, it is rude to carry on with an hours-long conversation at a volume that distrubs the other passengers. If the rest of the plane is quiet, it's for a reason: it's night time and people want to sleep/rest. Common sense rules in this situation.
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What I learned from travelling a lot - keep cool. I don't expect that I will arrive on time - I am more happy if it is really working. I don't expect, that I can make my connection - I am always happy, if I can reach my connecting flight.
For some reason I find myself having less and less patience with people spending all day trying to stuff their oversized suitcase in to the overhead, blocking the entire aisle for minutes at a time. I try not to be too anal about it, because the last thing I hate doing myself is reaching my seat and immediately having to dive in to it to get out of the way of people who are running up my backside like a locomotive. But when you're standing there trying to cram two and three bags in to the overhead, and holding up an entire jetway of people trying to board, you need to be flogged.
I'll always remember the ex losing it at an Italian train station once. About 20 of us standing in and orderly line for the only open ticket agent. This Italian woman just bypasses everyone in line and crowds up to the front. My ex says, "Hey, there is a line here. We've all been waiting for a long time for our turn." The Italian woman says, "This is Italy, not America, we do things differently here." Then the ex says, "What? Like being a b****?" A couple people clapped lightly and also started in on the woman. She rolled her eyes and walked to the back of the line.
And this is where I finally lost my temper. I yelled "people have connections to make, get out of the goddamn way!" and shoved past them. I rush into the terminal over to gate 24, only to see them closing out my flight. There is one person in front of me arguing with the gate agent, who was telling him that their flight was leaving from 25, not 24, and pointed to the correct gate. The person just wasn't getting it - and was insisting that they were leaving from this gate - and again, i lost it - and rudely said "dude, your flight is leaving from THERE (pointed to 25), get out of the way so I can make my flight".
You were of service to your fellow passengers trying to make connections. In terms of the idiot arguing with the gate agent, you did the poor employee a favor.
Guess I'm the contrarian, but I don't applaud the OP's behavior at all. I don't think it's ever right to lose one's temper.
and I disagree with that sentiment. There's a time and place for almost everything. If you read my example(s) on page 3 of this topic, you'll see a classic example. I think the situation where my ex lost her temper was entirely justified and the result was a positive outcome for us and all other travelers waiting. She tried to be polite but firm at first, but then she was blown off. She lost her temper briefly and put the person in her place. To not to have done so would have only re-enforced the rude behavior of the other traveler and would have been unfair to everyone else who had been waiting. There's also the whole letting people walk all over you issue, but some people don't have as much of a problem with that.
There's nothing rude about confronting inconsiderate people, especially after they've been asked many times to stop doing what they're doing. The OP's behavioral was totally justified.
There's one instance where I wish I (or other passengers or the authorities) had done more to stop the offending pax. At AMS on the way back to the US we were waiting at a customs line when these two loud women started taking trash out of their purses and just throwing in on the airport floor next to them. The person in line behind them picked some of it up and said (way too nicely) "you dropped something." They said "oh, no we don't need it," and continued throwing trash out onto the floor. The trash can was about 50 feet away. The authorities who saw it, rather than making them pick it up instead let them cut in line (I'm sure he just wanted them out of there).
Sorry, I disagree. I subscribe to the Star Trek mantra: The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one. If it's an overnight flight, it is rude to carry on with an hours-long conversation at a volume that distrubs the other passengers. If the rest of the plane is quiet, it's for a reason: it's night time and people want to sleep/rest. Common sense rules in this situation.
You didn't read my post very closely.
I said "I wouldn't have been the noisy chatterer, but if you tried that line on me in other circumstances" which means that I don't make noise when other people are trying to sleep, but I do expect people traveling on business to respect that they are in public space and not impose their business problems on others. So your Trekkie code fits right with what I said in my post: one business traveler does not have the right to demand an entire gate area shut up to for his phone call.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CDTraveler
You didn't read my post very closely.
I said "I wouldn't have been the noisy chatterer, but if you tried that line on me in other circumstances" which means that I don't make noise when other people are trying to sleep, but I do expect people traveling on business to respect that they are in public space and not impose their business problems on others. So your Trekkie code fits right with what I said in my post: one business traveler does not have the right to demand an entire gate area shut up to for his phone call.
I stand corrected, and I agree with the spirit of your post after rereading it.
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I haven't lost my temper whilst travelling in the air. (I have lost it at other times but not in the air or at airports.)
I almost did it once but I managed to avoid having to raise my voice and shout to wits end. I was at the baggage claim when I saw my bag come into vision...and before it came to me was taken off the belt. Immediately I grabbed my belongings and ran like a maniac after a couple who had taken my bag. The argument ensuing attracted the attention of one of the airport staff nearby, who promptly did the correct thing and checked the bag tag. It was my bag (of course).
I don't like losing my temper as much as the next person. I usually start with calm level of conversation, but with non-compliance I become increasingly vocal. What is worse is that the more vocal I am the more I will usually spout irrational remarks about the other party. Whilst they are not racist, sexist, anti-religious and do not use the common swear words, I've learnt that one doesn't need to draw upon any of the aforementioned to be extremely insulting.
If I'm in a hurry, it does tend to make things worse. But again, I haven't blown it so far.
To the OP, I think what you did was reasonable. Certainly not ideal, but given the circumstances was reasonable. In Asia you have to push and shove because everyone does it. (Asians are pretty immune to non-Asians losing their temper, because to them it just looks like a comedy act.)
, i have found that no matter how pi$$ed you are....
You were of service to your fellow passengers trying to make connections. In terms of the idiot arguing with the gate agent, you did the poor employee a favor. 
I stand corrected, and I agree with the spirit of your post after rereading it.
