There's a difference between being blunt and rude. Sometimes blunt is called for.
I'm a very calm person but I also will call people out in public when it's appropriate to do so.
In recent years I've actually adopted the strategy of taking a few sentences to verbosely explain to people exactly why what they're doing is inconsiderate or just plain silly. I find this to be very effective when there are other people around.
For example, with someone repeatedly kicking/pushing/whatever the back of your chair, after politely asking them to stop and having that not work:
"Hey, you're clearly aware that you're kicking my chair. You know I'm sitting here, but you keep kicking my chair even after I asked you to stop already. What universe do you live in where what you're doing is acceptable behavior? I mean I'm sitting here trying to figure this out, and it just boggles my mind. Can you please explain to me your thought process here, because I'm at a loss."
At that point there's a few people staring at them, their girlfriend/boyfriend or significant other (if present) is embarrassed and starts to apologize on their behalf, and usually people are so stunned that they just apologize and you don't hear a peep from them for the rest of the flight/movie/etc.
Rarely do they get an attitude at that point.
I also call out queue jumpers virtually every time I see them in pretty much the same manner, just a little less wordy. Queue jumpers merging into the very front of a line drive me insane. Cell phones in movies is my pet peeve though.
I was in a theater a few years ago and some teenage girl with her teenage "thug" boyfriend was blabbing on her phone super loud, and some huge musclebuilder stood up and TOOK the phone from her. The whole theater applauded him, although unfortunately it turned into a situation when the thug and all his friends got violent and the cops had to show up. Admittedly, I was still pleased as punch to see the punk kids get their butts handed to them.
Otherwise I'm a pretty laid back guy, and like to think that I'm a very considerate traveler.
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A few years back, EWR to Bologna, early 20's gal behind me was chatting nonstop with her seatmate. This was long after the meal service had concluded and the cabin lights were dimmed as it was an overnight flight. When I'd had enough, I turned around and said, "This is an overnight flight. Can you please keep it down?" She replied with something about she has as much rights as me, and I said a bit more loudly: "I am traveling on business. When I land, I need to shower and go directly to a meeting. Therefore, I need to sleep as much as possible NOW. If you would be silent for a few seconds and listen, you would notice the rest of the plane is completely quiet. Take a hint."
With that, I turned back around and closed my eyes. She did finally shut up.
I believe there is a way of speaking up to be heard, and that is not rude, a lot of times others are thinking the same thing. The person or persons holding you up sometimes are oblivious to that fact and are more embarrassed than upset. I think you did the correct thing.
I have never lost my temper with my fellow passengers.......Yet! I have come close, but its just not worth it. I will be blunt but polite when someone is blocking the way, or I just accidentally bump into them. I do this when people get in the jet way and stop to make a phone call right in the doorway when everyone else is trying to make their connections.
I will probably loose it sometime soon with the inevitable person pushing to the front of the security line because they could not get to the airport on time. Happens EVERY Monday morning.
I yelled "people have connections to make, get out of the goddamn way!" and shoved past them.
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Originally Posted by EasternTraveler
Good post, I think I would have probably shoved my way through them though.
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Originally Posted by newyorkgeorge
The best thing to do is yell very loudly "excuse me" and if they still don't get it push through. You have a flight to catch. I do it all the time. And don't feel bad about needing to be rude to clueless and rude people themselves (can't step aside and let someone who is in a hurry to pass).
You would be surprised at how well yelling in a commanding voice “Hot soup! Coming through! Hot soup!!!” works as you are trying to get through a crowd of people as they immediately move out of the way without thinking twice or looking.
It works for me every single time, regardless of the size of the crowd, even in the most unlikeliest of places where one would never find soup. It is far more effective than saying that people have connections to make.
I rarely lose my temper, but I suppose one of those "DYKWIA" types would probably set me off, along with the diva's who think everyone else on the plane is there to serve them.
However, if there are passengers verbally abusing a FA or GA because of something like bad weather or too many bags, I will step in on the side of the FA or GA.
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The only times I've gotten upset while traveling have been at station staff who completely dismiss me. I ask for them to check something and the response is, "I can't do that." That's happened to me at IAD, IAD, and IAD.
I got a little annoyed at a customer last week when we were doing the center queue for two CS agents, and this guy walks right up to the counter when the previous customer left. I said, "the queue is right here," and he said, "There's two lines."
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I haven't lost my temper, but have given some people "the look" (specially developed for commanding my middle school students and extremely effective)
However, on a short flt PDX-PHX a few years back-- the FA's sat 2 unattended boys (8 or 10 yrs old) together right behind us. Pretty soon.. kick, kick, kick. I turn around, the look, he stops. A few minutes later... kick, kick, kick. I turn around "Could you please not kick the seat? Thank you." It stops.
A few minutes later... kick, kick, kick. Now, Mr. P1 is very protective.. what the Princess wants he wants. (don't worry, I treat him like the King he is) He rises out of his seat and leans over mine. Very deep voice "Kid. You will STOP. Now. Do we have a problem?" (yes, they had pushed his button and I was now a tad worried that these kids were going to fly wingside)
(kid) "No sir."
No more problems! Until the FA kept giving them snack bags, which.. yes, ended up all over the poor guy next to them when we hit turbulance.
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I am sitting in Y on ORD-LAX typing away on my laptop trying to finish a project that was due when I landed, when the person in front of me reclined his seat.
Well, I hear the crack of laptop screen and reacted with lighting fast reflexes and slammed his seat forward as hard as I could.
Not while travelling, but at the final destination
So I was in South Africa for a wedding, it was late afternoon and still haven't found the dress that I needed. The trend these days is to have multiple cash registers but only one line. The line was empty. There was nobody there. I walked up to the lady at the cash register and she tells me I have to step back in line. I did a full 360 and said really loudly: "What line??? I am the line!" She then looked at me for about 30 seconds and called me forward.
I am sitting in Y on ORD-LAX typing away on my laptop trying to finish a project that was due when I landed, when the person in front of me reclined his seat.
Well, I hear the crack of laptop screen and reacted with lighting fast reflexes and slammed his seat forward as hard as I could.
I managed to save my laptop.
I take the position that the guy in front is as entitled to recline their seat as I am. They might want to sleep, they might have finished their meal, they just want to relax.
So I buy laptops that will still function even in Economy with the seat in front fully reclined. There is the added bonus that these things are usually light and portable.
Don't abuse or yell.... Question! "Sincerely" seek information from the other party.. Much more effective that way... make their participation part of the deal..
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My last MIA-SDQ I had two guys in the row behind me basically yelling at each other the whole trip. I was watching a movie on my laptop with my earphones on and could not even hear the movie!
I turned around and asked them very politely to drop it a few decibels.
The response was one saying to the other "you see, all white people are racist". (what do you even respond to that?)
(what do you even respond to that?)
