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Who gets the sofabed?

Who gets the sofabed?

Old Nov 18, 2014, 2:41 pm
  #16  
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He was being polite asking your preference. He didn't want to be presumptuous.

In your situation I'd have said the bed and not asked his preference.

In his situation once you asked I'd have said the bed and then said thanks.

What would you have done if upon asking his preference he'd said the bed? Would you have given it to him?
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 2:45 pm
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Make love and not war. Spoon.
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 3:36 pm
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In my own mind, if I'm paying for the room, then I get the bed that I want, and my friend gets what's left. If he's not happy with that, then he is free to pay for his own room and get the bed that he wants.

But I've learned to set expectations to avoid surprises: "I'm going to redeem points for a room. If you're comfortable staying in a sofabed, you're welcome to share."
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 5:17 pm
  #19  
 
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This is exactly why some people hate traveling with friends or family. When my family and I went to MCO, I said that we'll be choosing the minivan from the row at Thrifty, so follow me. I knew from FT to check the end of the row. Bingo, a loaded Town & Country, leather seats, TX plates, 48k mi, backup camera. A few of the inexperienced people with me wanted the base model Grand Caravans, with hard fabric seats, no backup camera, and FL plates, parked alongside. I said it's a fully loaded version instead of the base model, for the same price, and we have a one hour ride ahead, so we're taking this one. They kept asking for the stripped down vans. I finally said, "I'm driving. I want the big comfy leather seats. We're taking this one. Put your stuff in."
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 5:32 pm
  #20  
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Originally Posted by davie355
I disagree he should have asked my preference.

Travel agents ask if you prefer window or aisle. Middle is not an option because that's silly.

You need not read minds to understand that bed vs. sofa is silly.
So if your travel agent gives you the option of middle, window, or aisle, what do you do? You mark the one you want. You don't say "I don't care, what do you think I should have" and then get upset when you are given a middle. That is basically analogous to what you did.
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 5:58 pm
  #21  
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Originally Posted by cbn42
So if your travel agent gives you the option of middle, window, or aisle, what do you do? You mark the one you want. You don't say "I don't care, what do you think I should have" and then get upset when you are given a middle. That is basically analogous to what you did.
Aisle for me, but the analogy is tenuous.

Avis once gave me the option of a Ford Focus or Volkswagen Beetle. I waited for them to chuckle before I realized they were serious. I was offended (though I did not express it). I replied, "Ford Focus," and in my head, "of course."

Now, if I were traveling with a friend and my choice of the Ford meant my friend had to drive the Beetle, I would hesitate.
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 7:13 pm
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The friend on a free ride should have had the good manners to take the sofa bed. The friend took advantage.
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 7:25 pm
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Originally Posted by Nikolaos
If it is a girl, I always offer the bed.
As long as she doesn't mind sharing
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 7:31 pm
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You can split a king, don't be such a wimp next time. Though it should totally be assumed that he gets the sofa bed if it's anything smaller. I would, at least as a guest, assume I'm in the sofabed unless otherwise told. But really, I'm happily in a relationship with my girlfriend and if I had a king bed I'd just let someone else sleep in it. It's not like we're going to cop a feel in the middle of the night here.
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 7:42 pm
  #25  
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If someone needs the bed due to age, disability, medical problems, pregnancy, etc., that person should be sincerely offered the bed.

Otherwise, it depends on the relationship and how the trip was set up:

A last minute invitation for someone to share the room because, for example, they're drunk, means that they get the sofa bed (or floor), as the room's owner is doing them a favor or preventing something worse from happening.

If the invitation was along the suggested lines of "you can take the sofa bed for free", then the "guest" gets the sofa bed because that's what was offered and accepted (as in a contract), with no further discussion except possibly for a last minute broken leg or some similar emergency. The guest should still offer to pay for something else, even as a gesture that doesn't come close to half the value of the room, or otherwise eventually offer a thank you gift.

If the invitation was "be my guest" for a birthday or special occasion, the birthday boy/girl gets the bed out of courtesy, just as I would offer a guest the most comfortable chair in my living room.

If it's some version of friends traveling together, then I'd look at how expenses are being split more generally, possibly versus what each party can afford to contribute if they philosophically take this stance. So the OP might be using his/her points for the room, but if the other person has used their miles for both tickets or if the other one is paying for dinners, etc., they have equal claims on the bed, so tossing a coin is reasonable.

Last edited by MSPeconomist; Nov 18, 2014 at 7:51 pm
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 9:46 pm
  #26  
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Originally Posted by Badenoch
He was being polite asking your preference. He didn't want to be presumptuous.
I call BS - there is no reason to ask the question when you know the answer. Nobody wants the sofa. The friend clearly wanted to open a discussion with the objective of securing the bed.

Originally Posted by mikew99
In my own mind, if I'm paying for the room, then I get the bed that I want, and my friend gets what's left. If he's not happy with that, then he is free to pay for his own room and get the bed that he wants.

But I've learned to set expectations to avoid surprises: "I'm going to redeem points for a room. If you're comfortable staying in a sofabed, you're welcome to share."
+1 Ding ding - this is the correct answer.

The only exception would be in the unlikely event I sharing a room with my Dad, in which case I would offer him the bed out of respect. But he'd probably be paying at least 50% anyway.
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 10:38 pm
  #27  
 
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Person paying gets the bed, unless the friend has a condition or very good reason they need the bed. Realistically the guest should have never asked the question and immediately taken the sofa bed.

Last edited by industry_killer; Nov 18, 2014 at 10:38 pm Reason: Sp.
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 11:03 pm
  #28  
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Originally Posted by davie355
Avis once gave me the option of a Ford Focus or Volkswagen Beetle. I waited for them to chuckle before I realized they were serious. I was offended (though I did not express it). I replied, "Ford Focus," and in my head, "of course."
See, there's no accounting for taste. That's far from an "of course" IMO; if I didn't need a 4-door, and assuming this isn't some 3rd-world country where there are still old rear-engine Beetles kicking around (eta: though honestly, I'd probably take one of those for nostalgia value) ... I'd take the New Beetle in a heartbeat.

Last edited by nkedel; Nov 19, 2014 at 12:21 pm
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Old Nov 18, 2014, 11:06 pm
  #29  
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Originally Posted by davie355
Avis once gave me the option of a Ford Focus or Volkswagen Beetle. I waited for them to chuckle before I realized they were serious. I was offended (though I did not express it). I replied, "Ford Focus," and in my head, "of course."
I can't tell if this is some sort of sarcasm or if you were really offended that a car rental person would ask you what kind of car you want. That is their job. I would be offended if they made presumptions about me and didn't ask. There are many, perfectly logical reasons why one might want a Beetle rather than a Focus.
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Old Nov 19, 2014, 7:55 am
  #30  
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Originally Posted by cbn42
I can't tell if this is some sort of sarcasm or if you were really offended that a car rental person would ask you what kind of car you want. That is their job. I would be offended if they made presumptions about me and didn't ask. There are many, perfectly logical reasons why one might want a Beetle rather than a Focus.
I can think of 9/10 friends who would take the Beetle in a heartbeat, it is a 'fun' car! I am not a particular fan of the Beetle, but I would probably take it for the fact it is a VW, which I far prefer driving, and tends to have a higher base model level than Fords (I've owned both VWs and Ford myself).
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