Fredd

You can always tell them they've called a murder scene and carry on with Tom Mabe's script from there.

kingalien

Me: Pick up phone....Hello?
wait
Me: Hello?
Hello, we are calling blah, blah, blah
Me: Hello?
Can you hear me?
Me: Hello, speak louder
blah blah blah
Me: Hello?
hang up

Fornebufox

I always inform the caller that "this household does not accept solicitation calls" and then hang up, though I have had callers insist that theirs was not a solicitation call. When they turn out to be lying I just hang up.

jplux

Thank you for that link...it provided a much need laugh

redreeper

I'm on the do not call list, they still call. Lots of local doctors offereing free exams (eww?) and my all time favorite was the college girl calling to excitedly inform me that I just won a free cemetery plot. Thanks.... I was hoping I would die soon and its just what I needed.
Usually I just tell them I'm sorry but I don't speak english (in english) and hang up.

ScottC

I've got 15 or 20 numbers whitelisted, the rest go through screening to voicemail. I see the number pop up and if it turned out to be important I'll call back.

ninerfan

I am also on the call list and a few still get thru, but nothing like before. I am really not home enough to get an awful lot of calls

daved

There is an unforeseen loophole in the Do Not Call legislation.

Internet calls are technically legal. So, US companies outsource these solicitation calls to an overseas company who then use VOIP to call you. This is not against the law. Some in congress are starting to here complaints about this and are slowly moving to modify the Do Not Call law. We'll probably have to put up with this for a few more years with the frequency of these calls increasing as word gets out.

redbeard911

If I'm feeling especially spunky, I'll do something like this:

Caller: "Is Mr. Reedbard there?"
Me: "It's Redbeard"
Caller: "Oh, sorry sir. How are you today?"
Me: "I'm not in the mood to take unsolicited calls. What is your name?"
Caller: "I'm Bob, if you'll just give me a moment...
Me: "What is your company?"
Caller: "I'm with Luxury Timeshares."
Me: "Well, Bob, I'm on the national, state, and city do-not-call lists. You have just violated the law. I am filing a complaint against the company and you. The penalties are $1000 per infraction, and I've collected several times. Are you still interested in continuing this call?"
<click>

LEX-LGA Commuter

Just got the "we're giving you free satellite service" call at the pro shop where I work. (Retirement is going well!) So, I have lots of time to mess with these people.

Foreigner: Sir, we see you have cable service - so we are going to offer you free satellite service.
Me: Oh, OK.
Foreigner: Sir, how many tellyvisions do you currently have on cable?
Me: 22
Foreigner: Twenty and two?
Me: That's correct.
Foreigner: Why on earth would you have twenty and two tellyvisions?
Me: Because we are a country club. Don't you know who you're calling?
Foreigner: Oh, of course sir, of course. So what is your biggest problem with your cable service?
Me: Beavers.
Foreigner: Beevuhs?
Me: Beavers! The damned things keep gnawing through the cable, all over the place. You ever tried to kill a beaver with a sand wedge? They will smack the **** out of you with those tails. You gotta watch out! And they build those dams in our ponds, and they clog up our creeks, and they crap all over the banks, and they.......
Foreigner: CLICK

Larrude

According to the FTC's website, it makes no difference if the calls are made from outside the US - if you are registered, they are not allowed to call:

"Who Must Comply with the Amended TSR?

The amended TSR regulates “telemarketing”— defined in the Rule as “a plan, program, or campaign . . . to induce the purchase of goods or services or a charitable contribution” involving more than one interstate telephone call. (The FCC regulates both intrastate and interstate calling. More information is available from www.fcc.gov.) With some important exceptions, any businesses or individuals that take part in “telemarketing” must comply with the Rule. This is true whether, as “telemarketers,” they initiate or receive telephone calls to or from consumers, or as “sellers,” they provide, offer to provide, or arrange to provide goods or services to consumers in exchange for payment. It makes no difference whether a company makes or receives calls using low-tech equipment or the newest technology—such as voice response units (VRUs) and other automated systems. Similarly, it makes no difference whether the calls are made from outside the United States; so long as they are made to consumers in the United States, those making the calls, unless otherwise exempt, must comply with the TSR’s provisions. If the calls are made to induce the purchase of goods, services, or a charitable contribution, the company is engaging in “telemarketing.”

Certain sections of the Rule apply to individuals or companies other than “sellers” or “telemarketers” if these individuals or companies provide substantial assistance or support to sellers or telemarketers. The Rule also applies to individuals or companies that provide telemarketers with unauthorized access to the credit card system.

pseudoswede

The correct answer is...

Me: I watch a lot of pornography.

Improvise from there.

redbeard911

This is in the Travel Technology forum why?

SRQ Guy

I hang up on all telemarketers, on the rare occasions that I answer their call in the first place.

Xyzzy

For some reason, one of our lines seems to be listed under the name of someone who used to have one of our numbers. Whenever the phone rings and someone asks for that person I ask what they are selling. They are always quite taken aback.