Who moved my porn?
Jan 27, 2009, 7:13 pm
#1
Original Poster
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: SDF via MCO DFW, FSD, BDS, DSM, ORD, OMA
Posts: 612
Who moved my porn?
Ok, so I subscribe to a couple of gentleman's magazines (Playboy, Penthouse) but since my 7 & 8 year old kids started absconding with them I've taken to leaving them in their mailing wrappers and just bring on the road with me when I travel. (And of course I leave them behind for the enjoyment of FT treasure-seekers in hotel rooms).
At any rate, flew yesterday SDF-DFW-SFO and had the magazines in checked luggage, in the front zipper compartment. Imagine my surprise to find the wrappers ripped open and a TSA card stuck inside as a bookmark when I unpacked.
What is the story here? TSA folks bored? Or underpaid and can't afford their own?
More importantly, whom do I contact for a refund as I'm really not interested in handling previously handled porn.
Is this part of the 'change' that was promised?
At any rate, flew yesterday SDF-DFW-SFO and had the magazines in checked luggage, in the front zipper compartment. Imagine my surprise to find the wrappers ripped open and a TSA card stuck inside as a bookmark when I unpacked.
What is the story here? TSA folks bored? Or underpaid and can't afford their own?
More importantly, whom do I contact for a refund as I'm really not interested in handling previously handled porn.
Is this part of the 'change' that was promised?
Jan 27, 2009, 7:49 pm
#3
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: May 2002
Location: NYC, USA
Programs: AA EXP 3MM, Lifetime Platinum, Marriott Titanium, HH Gold
Posts: 10,967
Sounds like just a childish prank. Clearly, a couple of baggage screeners had a good laugh at your expense and wanted you to know that they had seen your stash. (I guess you can be thankful that it was back-room screening, not the kind that happens in the public terminal, much less in your presence.)
I would use gloves to remove the magazine from your bag before recycling it.
I would use gloves to remove the magazine from your bag before recycling it.
Jan 27, 2009, 10:12 pm
#4
Join Date: May 2005
Location: various cities in the USofA: NYC, BWI, IAH, ORD, CVG, NYC
Programs: Former UA 1K, National Exec. Elite
Posts: 5,485
Sounds like just a childish prank. Clearly, a couple of baggage screeners had a good laugh at your expense and wanted you to know that they had seen your stash. (I guess you can be thankful that it was back-room screening, not the kind that happens in the public terminal, much less in your presence.)
These are the children that are entrusted with protecting us?
I have a fantastic idea: a suitcase with a built-in camera that records whenever the bag is opened. (Patent pending)
Jan 27, 2009, 11:31 pm
#5
Original Poster
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: SDF via MCO DFW, FSD, BDS, DSM, ORD, OMA
Posts: 612
Jan 27, 2009, 11:34 pm
#6
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 22
Were they of the proclivity that likes to cup male genitals? Maybe they were giving a hint for you the next time you're in town.
Jan 28, 2009, 12:02 am
#7
Original Poster
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: SDF via MCO DFW, FSD, BDS, DSM, ORD, OMA
Posts: 612
Jan 28, 2009, 12:19 am
#8
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 22
It's actually cool that they're okay with porn being looked at, especially lesbian porn. Anymore, maybe I should pack some to look at while I'm being frisked to take my mind off the frisking. Can you imagine? A big and pretty bro like me standing there looking at a lesbian porn mag while one guys frisks my booty and another one cups my nature?
Jan 28, 2009, 4:46 am
#10
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: An NPR mind living in a Fox News world
Posts: 14,165
I Conducted An Experiment...
A couple of years ago, I was taking longer trips and had to check a suitcase on occasion. As an experiment, I took a blank CD, wrote a title on it like: "Jenna Jamieson classics" (not sure I even spelled her stage name correctly). When you opened up the disc, I created a folder called "movie". Inside the folder, I had a single powerpoint slide saying something like (can't remember the exact wording):
I put the CD in a clear jewel case so one could clearly read the title. I put it in an outside compartment where it would be clear to someone searching my luggage that I had expected to arrive with the CD still in my luggage -- i.e.: I didn't place it on top of everything completely exposed. I locked the suitcase with official TSA-approved locks with the "I've been opened" indicator, so it would be pretty obvious who had been inside.
The little experiment proved successful twice in 6 tries. In each case, the screeners had opened the suitcase because I had the TSA greeting card and the lock indicators had been tripped.
- Greetings, Mr. Transportation Security Officer!
- You've taken the bait -- Sorry to disappoint you.
- You're nothing more than a thief and common criminal.
- Have a nice day.
I put the CD in a clear jewel case so one could clearly read the title. I put it in an outside compartment where it would be clear to someone searching my luggage that I had expected to arrive with the CD still in my luggage -- i.e.: I didn't place it on top of everything completely exposed. I locked the suitcase with official TSA-approved locks with the "I've been opened" indicator, so it would be pretty obvious who had been inside.
The little experiment proved successful twice in 6 tries. In each case, the screeners had opened the suitcase because I had the TSA greeting card and the lock indicators had been tripped.
Ok, so I subscribe to a couple of gentleman's magazines (Playboy, Penthouse) but since my 7 & 8 year old kids started absconding with them I've taken to leaving them in their mailing wrappers and just bring on the road with me when I travel. (And of course I leave them behind for the enjoyment of FT treasure-seekers in hotel rooms).
At any rate, flew yesterday SDF-DFW-SFO and had the magazines in checked luggage, in the front zipper compartment. Imagine my surprise to find the wrappers ripped open and a TSA card stuck inside as a bookmark when I unpacked.
What is the story here? TSA folks bored? Or underpaid and can't afford their own?
More importantly, whom do I contact for a refund as I'm really not interested in handling previously handled porn.
Is this part of the 'change' that was promised?
At any rate, flew yesterday SDF-DFW-SFO and had the magazines in checked luggage, in the front zipper compartment. Imagine my surprise to find the wrappers ripped open and a TSA card stuck inside as a bookmark when I unpacked.
What is the story here? TSA folks bored? Or underpaid and can't afford their own?
More importantly, whom do I contact for a refund as I'm really not interested in handling previously handled porn.
Is this part of the 'change' that was promised?
Jan 28, 2009, 7:55 am
#13
Join Date: Jan 2008
Programs: I work for the TSA
Posts: 848
The dude asleep in the wheelchair probably was suffering from sexual exhaustion after ... viewing ... too much pRon in checked baggage!
(For the record, I think ripping open the wrappers was uncool -- they should have settled for ... admiring ... the cover art!)
(For the record, I think ripping open the wrappers was uncool -- they should have settled for ... admiring ... the cover art!)
Jan 28, 2009, 9:04 am
#15
FlyerTalk Evangelist
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 10,037