I generally like Grossman's "4 Ps" and agree with his premise that you'll do better if you're polite, but in his examples Grossman fails to make a key distincion between asking for favors that are outside of the rules and insisting that bare-minimum levels of service are provided.
In the case of asking for favors, which made up most of his examples (op upgrades, rebook a missed flight), there's no excuse for anything but the best decorum.
But the article started out with an example where the rental car company had thoroughly screwed up and there was no hope whatsoever for any resolution to the problem so there was absolutely nothing to gain by being nice.
That's totally different, and let's face it, some of us (me included) have personalities where we feel better letting the person know they've screwed up, telling them how upset we are, and letting their company know where we will take our future business. Politness and patience are wonderful things but have to go at least partly both ways, and they must be paired with at leat minimum competence from the service provider.
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I am of the opinion that, in any situation, no matter how bad they screwed up, "going ballistic" on the agent manning the desk will get you nothing - in many cases, literally. Even Grossman noted this - his "mean boss" had to go to another agency and rent a car. They probably had to pay a higher rate, too. The "nice boss" had the support of the car agency that made the mistake to help handle the reservation, and probably got a rate as good as - or maybe even better than - he originally had.
As a former front-line customer service agent, there is no excuse to being abusive to "us". All it does is ensure we are not going to do anything to help you.
I practice the "Four P's", no matter the situation. I find I get a lot more in compensation and support then the person next to me, in the same situation, who blusters and blows. And all of it is willingly given to me by the agent. I don't have to ask. It's just given to me as a "thank you" for showing some understanding.
[This message has been edited by SEA_Tigger (edited 10-21-2003).]
