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It Gets Better, Unless You're Fat

It Gets Better, Unless You're Fat

Old Oct 22, 2013, 6:03 am
  #16  
 
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Originally Posted by Adam1222
And can a mod shut down this wildly off topic thread. I suggest a therapists office or queer theory forum would be a more appropriate forum.
And I agree. Travel is the theme of this forum, and this thread has nothing to do with travel, although I do think it has merits in other places.
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Old Oct 22, 2013, 9:15 am
  #17  
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After reading this, I too think this thread needs a lock and delete.
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Old Oct 22, 2013, 1:42 pm
  #18  
 
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I have always wanted to go to "Lazy Bear Weekend."
anyone here ever been?
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Old Oct 22, 2013, 10:29 pm
  #19  
 
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Originally Posted by tatterdema
And I agree. Travel is the theme of this forum, and this thread has nothing to do with travel, although I do think it has merits in other places.
Oh, I dunno - some of the opinions expressed herein are a real trip!
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Old Oct 22, 2013, 11:00 pm
  #20  
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Originally Posted by bocastephen
No, my point is the gay community is responsible for promoting acceptance within its own walls before running around demanding acceptance from the outside world.
I strongly disagree with that. I am responsible for my own actions, and racists are responsible for their own actions. The fact that I am gay does not impose any higher level of responsibility on me - I am still responsible for my own actions and nobody else's.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 12:43 am
  #21  
 
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There are places, some with a predominately LGBT clientele, many not, where an overweight person may feel uncomfortable. There are also places where a non-overweight person may feel uncomfortable. The issue raised in the article is that there are places attracting primarily LGBT patrons where an overweight LGBT individual may feel excluded. People can debate all day on if the author's weight is the primary reason he feels unwelcome at certain establishments. FTers could probably list many places where overweight LGBT individuals would feel welcome and others where they might not feel as welcome.

People do have preferences when it comes to finding a mate, be it for a short or long term relationship. Businesses are held to a higher standard except in some very specific circumstances, some of which remain controversial.

Concerning needing to promote acceptance within before having acceptance from the outside world, that's something often suggested for individuals and some groups, but is rarely practiced by those suggesting it. Oftentimes, even partial acceptance from outside entities can be helpful for those struggling to accept themselves. Many LGBT people come out in college rather than high school because the atmosphere is more accepting. The author of the article did relieve some stress by coming out. Sure he still has some stress, but the overall burden is less.

My local paper recently published an article about a local state representative who is 6'3" tall and went from 350+ pounds to 202 pounds over a couple of years. This state representative is also openly gay and is well respected in the community. He explained that one of his main reasons for losing weight was that he felt that his weight would seen as a negative much like it has been for New Jersey Governor Chris Christie. While he's always been on the bigger side, the stresses of the past few years caused him to gain weight to the point where it was becoming a major personal issue for him, much like it appears to be for the author of the author of the posted article. While he still likely wouldn't be chosen to be a designer underwear model or let into certain clubs, he's much more happy with himself and ready to take on the world. Some people might feel the same way at 300 pounds, some 150, but what is important is that the person feels comfortable with themselves and has a fair chance at achieving realistic goals.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 7:39 am
  #22  
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Originally Posted by Adam1222
And can a mod shut down this wildly off topic thread. I suggest a therapists office or queer theory forum would be a more appropriate forum.
We've had a discussion on this thread and while it is not really travel related it is GLBT. We've decided to let it stand based on allowing freer discussion in the forum that many have wanted.

Please discuss the subject but no personal attacks allowed.

Thank you!!

Peteropny - co-mod - GLBT
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 2:03 pm
  #23  
 
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Originally Posted by peteropny
We've had a discussion on this thread and while it is not really travel related it is GLBT.
Excellent. Next time I need an adult toy recommendation I will start a thread.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 2:19 pm
  #24  
 
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Originally Posted by ORDnHKG
For you that you can shed some weight, howabout being asian who doesn't have a big penis, that has no way to increase my size, not to mention plenty of sizequeens out there, with your logic what can I do about it then ?
I must take issue with this. I'm Asian, and I have a huge penis.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 2:38 pm
  #25  
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Originally Posted by Adam1222
Excellent. Next time I need an adult toy recommendation I will start a thread.
If you don't want to participate, you can unsubscribe

It's an interesting topic for discussion and a little more refreshing than the usual "where can I meet guys in XXXX", "where is the best bar to get xxxxx" or "Gayla 2013 - Lincoln Nebraska!"

...and it's a real issue that should be brought front and center and addressed by the community at large.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 2:41 pm
  #26  
 
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Originally Posted by JonathanIT
I must take issue with this. I'm Asian, and I have a huge penis.


That post is so not family friendly!!!

Originally Posted by Adam1222
Excellent. Next time I need an adult toy recommendation I will start a thread.
That would allow some people a detailed excuse to how to tell you to go .... yourself and be within the bounds of allowable, on topic, discourse.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 2:46 pm
  #27  
 
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Originally Posted by bocastephen
It's an interesting topic for discussion and a little more refreshing than the usual "where can I meet guys in XXXX", "where is the best bar to get xxxxx" or "Gayla 2013 - Lincoln Nebraska!"

...and it's a real issue that should be brought front and center and addressed by the community at large.
The problem is those topics are relevant to Flyertalk, and this isn't. This isn't the "community at large." It's not a novel topic, fat gay men whine all the time and have been for decades.

If you want to make a change, posting on Flyertalk isn't going to do it. Get off your duff (and/or airplane), perhaps to the gym, or a social venue, and make friends. There are plenty of fat gays who aren't miserable, whining, and making excuses blaming other people for their social ineptitude.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 2:52 pm
  #28  
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Originally Posted by Adam1222
The problem is those topics are relevant to Flyertalk, and this isn't. This isn't the "community at large." It's not a novel topic, fat gay men whine all the time and have been for decades.

If you want to make a change, posting on Flyertalk isn't going to do it. Get off your duff (and/or airplane), perhaps to the gym, or a social venue, and make friends. There are plenty of fat gays who aren't miserable, whining, and making excuses blaming other people for their social ineptitude.
I'm pretty sure you're exactly the type of person the article was talking about. Maybe I'm wrong but for me the miles and points aspect of Flyetralk is secondary to the spirit of community. I live in North Carolina among people who have Facebook names like First name GodFirst Last Name and who argue about how gay people cannot be preachers because they are going to Hell and don't live the entire bible. It's nice to be able to come here and discuss such issues with open minded people of a similar background to me.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 3:01 pm
  #29  
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Originally Posted by ORDnHKG
It seems like you have more a personal self-confidence issue than anything.

For you that you can shed some weight, howabout being asian who doesn't have a big penis, that has no way to increase my size, not to mention plenty of sizequeens out there, with your logic what can I do about it then ?
Perhaps its my personal self-confidence, I know that I'm happier and feel better when my weight is less and I think most gays will say the same. How many people do you know who want to gain weight? How many people do you know who want to be unhealthier? How many people do you know want to spend more on health care? So spin that idea you can't do anything about it all you want.
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Old Oct 23, 2013, 3:05 pm
  #30  
 
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Originally Posted by CMK10
I'm pretty sure you're exactly the type of person the article was talking about. Maybe I'm wrong but for me the miles and points aspect of Flyetralk is secondary to the spirit of community. I live in North Carolina among people who have Facebook names like First name GodFirst Last Name and who argue about how gay people cannot be preachers because they are going to Hell and don't live the entire bible. It's nice to be able to come here and discuss such issues with open minded people of a similar background to me.
I'm actually hardly skinny. I used to be even fatter. The solution was not Flyertalk.

There are plenty of Jesus-lovers on this website. And plenty of people who live in the South who don't blame everyone else for their problems. And you live in DURHAM for Christ's sake. Not some backwoods cabin where you have no one to talk to.

I don't know what you are referring to as "open minded people of a similar background" to you. Do you mean fat gay people? Fat gay people who like whining? Fat gay people who like points? If so, most of those communities have other places on the web.
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