Go Back  FlyerTalk Forums > Travel&Dining > DiningBuzz
Reload this Page >

Lectures from the waitstaff

Lectures from the waitstaff

Old Sep 1, 2015, 8:18 am
  #46  
Suspended
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Ontario, Canada
Programs: Aeroplan, IHG, Enterprise, Avios, Nexus
Posts: 8,355
Originally Posted by jill5172
Years ago, I was hosting a business lunch at Le Louis XV (Alain Ducasse restaurant that earned him three Michelin stars). Our lunch was scheduled for around noon, and the guest of honor was speaking at a convention at 2 PM. The first embarrassment occurred when the guest of honor was given the only menu with prices on it (at the time, about 350 euro pp for the price fixe menu).

The next embarrassment occurred when the server learned that the guest of honor wouldn't be there for the entire 3+ hour meal event, loudly proclaimed to him, "If you cannot stay for the entire meal, you cannot eat!"

The guest of honor was a very traditional, gentlemanly type and he just said, "of course, I understand, no problem. Please just go ahead with the rest of the table." We tried to get the server to allow him to participate in as many courses as he could before leaving, to no avail.

The server then proceeded to serve at least three courses to the rest of the table, pointedly bypassing our guest of honor every time. It was hugely embarrassing.

Despite that, it was still the best meal I've ever had.
Is part of dining at such establishments being abused and embarrassed by servers? Is it some sort of culinary S&M thing? The meal can only be great if we pay massively but are treated poorly?

In this instance I would have told the server that the guest who initially had to leave changed his plans so as to enjoy the meal. Then he could leave at his convenience having enjoyed the early courses.
Badenoch is offline  
Old Sep 1, 2015, 10:04 am
  #47  
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Central Texas
Programs: Many, slipping beneath the horizon
Posts: 9,859
Originally Posted by violist
Was that Imre the guy with the eyebrows? My favorite.
Yes, I believe so.

Watching/listening to the "locals" have Sunday lunch at Galatoire's (or better yet, seated with locals - NEVER MORE THAN 4 TO A TABLE!** -remains a quintessential NOLA experience. An old friend, long in New Orleans, now retired to the desolate prairies of far North Dallas, and I commiserate about the memories of long afternoons tucked into a table at what was likely never a "multi-star" on the Michelin map, but in my life and travels certainly among a handful of restaurants worthy of the classification "Most Enjoyable".

**No waiter or waitstaff, even the best, can really "serve" with style and appropriate personal attention a large table of guests. Even the best attempts while acceptable fall short.
TMOliver is offline  
Old Sep 1, 2015, 10:08 am
  #48  
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: YWG
Programs: Aeroplan, MileagePlus, Marriott Rewards
Posts: 2,155
Originally Posted by Badenoch
In this instance I would have told the server that the guest who initially had to leave changed his plans so as to enjoy the meal. Then he could leave at his convenience having enjoyed the early courses.
+1

The guest of honour must have been a very classy (and patient) individual to tolerate that kind of disgraceful treatment.
heraclitus is offline  
Old Sep 1, 2015, 11:18 pm
  #49  
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: DEN or KOA
Programs: UA PLAT. DL PLAT, AOPA, MUG CLUB AT ROCK BOTTOM
Posts: 832
Was eating at a very nice seafood place overlooking the intercoastal in Lauderdale with 4 couples. I finished before my GF (normal) and after about 15 minutes of looking at my dirty, empty plates; asked a bus boy to remove them. He said that "we do not clean the table until everyone is finished". I said "take them or they will be in the river". They got taken away.
hawkxp is offline  
Old Sep 2, 2015, 12:11 am
  #50  
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Programs: QFF Gold, Flying Blue, Enrich
Posts: 5,366
Originally Posted by Delta Hog
Did you crumble crackers in it? DID YOU CRUMBLE??!! If so, well it could be a meal.
It was in Paris - I've never seen such a thing, not even from the gauchest of foreigners.
BadgerBoi is offline  
Old Sep 2, 2015, 11:44 am
  #51  
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: STL
Programs: WN or DL; Hyatt or Wyndham
Posts: 1,073
Originally Posted by BadgerBoi
It was in Paris - I've never seen such a thing, not even from the gauchest of foreigners.

Jerry Seinfeld: So he just gets soup. He wants to save the meal. So now I got to do it all over again.
Elaine Benes: What kind of soup did he get?
Jerry Seinfeld: I don't know. Consomme or something.
Elaine Benes: Consomme, hmm.
Jerry Seinfeld: What?
Elaine Benes: Well, that's not really a meal, Jerry. I mean, if he had gotten Chicken Gumbo, or Matzah Ball, or Mushroom Barley. Then I would agree with you. Those are very hearty soups.
Jerry Seinfeld: Elaine, you're missing the whole point.
Elaine Benes: What?
Jerry Seinfeld: The meal is the act of sitting down with him. It doesn't matter what you get. As long as he's sitting in that restaurant, it's a meal.
Elaine Benes: Was it a cup or a bowl?
Jerry Seinfeld: You see - ah, uh...
Elaine Benes: I'm just curious.
Jerry Seinfeld: A bowl, okay?
Elaine Benes: Did he crumble any crackers in it?
[Jerry exhales in exasperation]
Elaine Benes: Did he crumble any crackers in it?
Jerry Seinfeld: As a matter of fact, he did.
Elaine Benes: Oh, well. Crackers in a bowl. That, that could be a meal.
Jerry Seinfeld: It's like I'm talking to my Aunt Sylvia here.
Delta Hog is offline  
Old Sep 2, 2015, 9:17 pm
  #52  
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Programs: QFF Gold, Flying Blue, Enrich
Posts: 5,366
Well, if it's ok with Elaine...(all these years later and the mention of her name still makes my heart skip a beat)
BadgerBoi is offline  
Old Oct 31, 2015, 9:18 am
  #53  
 
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Germany
Programs: United Mileage Plus, Marriott Rewards Gold, Club Carlson, Starwood Gold, AAdvantage
Posts: 50
Originally Posted by hawkxp
Was eating at a very nice seafood place overlooking the intercoastal in Lauderdale with 4 couples. I finished before my GF (normal) and after about 15 minutes of looking at my dirty, empty plates; asked a bus boy to remove them. He said that "we do not clean the table until everyone is finished". I said "take them or they will be in the river". They got taken away.
Etiquette is (as most fine dining restaurants) that plates are not to be removed until all diners at the table have finished. However, if you asked, then it should be removed without a word. It is rather improper to have them removed as it makes everyone at the table feel rushed.
onlysilver is offline  
Old Nov 1, 2015, 7:28 am
  #54  
FlyerTalk Evangelist
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 26,278
Originally Posted by onlysilver
Etiquette is (as most fine dining restaurants) that plates are not to be removed until all diners at the table have finished. However, if you asked, then it should be removed without a word. It is rather improper to have them removed as it makes everyone at the table feel rushed.
It may or may not be improper, depending upon the circumstances. More than five or ten minutes elapsed with empty, dirty dishes? Time to clear them away.
MaxBuck is offline  
Old Nov 1, 2015, 7:31 am
  #55  
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: ELP
Programs: AAdvantage, Amex MR
Posts: 2,309
Speaking of being lectured by waitstaff, this happened to me a few days ago in Kansas City.


The other day I had the absolute worst customer service experience in a restaurant I have ever had in Kansas City. Check it out, so before the game I go to this Chinese food place. I walk into the door and stand around for a few minutes in front of the counter, because I was not sure if this was one of those restaurants where you seat yourself or wait to be seated so I was just going to wait on someone to tell me. Then someone comes to the counter and asks me what I will have. Haven't seen a menu yet, havent even been seated yet so I say this is the first time I have been here, can I see a menu? He says sure and hands me one, I decide on the orange chicken and order it. I see behind me in another room there are tables and chairs. So I get my food, pay for my order, leave a tip, and then walk to the tables in the next room to sit down and eat.

Just then that same server that rang up my order starts lecturing me about eating take out food in the dining area, saying that if I wanted to eat inside I needed to order in this other room with the tables and chairs, right then I was so fuming I was about to just blow a gasket. I decided not to because I had no place to eat this food and didn't want to get kicked out. Hey server guy, when I literally tell you this is the first time I have been here, you think a good question to ask would have been is this for here or to go?
Afterward he said its ok, just know for next time if you want to eat inside order in this other room. So i finished my food and left.

My only regret is after I was done eating I didn't go up to the cash register and find the manager and demand my tip to be taken off the credit card recept. Anyone work in the restaurant business? Is it possible to re-run a credit card transaction with a 0 tip after the bill has already been closed out?

My whole life I have never had a restaurant experience that pissed me off, until a few days ago. I always tip between 17-20% ish or so depending on how the rounding works out. I always tip that much regardless of service so if the bill is for example, 16 dollars, I will take 10% of that and double it, so 3.20, and then round down to leave a 3 dollar tip. I will leave 7 dollars on a 34 dollar bill, etc.

You have REALLY got to suck as a server if I want to leave 0.

Dadaluma83 is offline  
Old Nov 1, 2015, 10:13 am
  #56  
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Central Texas
Programs: Many, slipping beneath the horizon
Posts: 9,859
Originally Posted by Dadaluma83
Speaking of being lectured by waitstaff, this happened to me a few days ago in Kansas City....snippagio, sad tale of woe from mistreatment in "Chinese" rerstaurant....
I would be more sympathetic had I not spent much time abroad.

In France, Italy and Spain, small "coffee bar" type establishments will often have three sets of prices...

Cheapest - standing at the counter to eat and or drink.
Mid-price - seated at a table inside (waiter service - bad ju-ju to seat your self to consume items ordered at the service bar).
Most expensive - seated outside

In Asia, especially SEA - The "mistreatment" you received is in many locations more than commonplace. It's to be expected. For Asians in the US, the cultural tattoos of centuries are hard to eradicate in a few years. I've encountered the same "arrangements" (2 menus, different prices) in "Asian", mostly Chinese, in several larger US cities. I'll never forget my experience many years ago in NYC, learning that a small restaurant I liked and frequented several times a week had 3 menus, "Take Out", "Table Service for [non-Chinese]), and "Chinese Menu" (cheapest, widest variety). After about a month, the owner explained the intricacies of the Chinese menu and thereafter served and price my meal from it, providing me with the same - I guess - premium treatment accorded those who read/spoke his language.

I understand from my nephew [redacted] who lives and works in Beijing and has traveled throughout China, an amazingly diverse place, that there are areas where the locals expect the waiters to be disputacious. I recall that those in Cholon could be. My nephew also claims that many local restaurants require patrons to bring their own containers for "take out", but do maintain (as in India) substantial stocks of special metal/bamboo takeout containers for meal delivery to nearby offices - leaving one set, then picking it up on the next delivery.

Last edited by cblaisd; Nov 16, 2015 at 5:33 pm Reason: After consultation with Community Director, removed offensive words
TMOliver is offline  
Old Nov 8, 2015, 2:29 pm
  #57  
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: GLA
Programs: BA Silver
Posts: 2,949
Originally Posted by MaxBuck
It may or may not be improper, depending upon the circumstances. More than five or ten minutes elapsed with empty, dirty dishes? Time to clear them away.
Interesting how different people in different places interpret things. I (and I suspect most people this side of the pond) would find a waiter clearing plates away whilst someone at the table is still eating to be incredibly rude. Indeed, as a relatively slow eater, I still can't get used to this practice when I visit the USA - it puts so much pressure on you to eat up and get out (that and bringing the bill unbidden, often without even asking about dessert or coffee).

What was the absolute height of rudeness however, was threatening to throw the plate in the river if it wasn't cleared - obnoxious and classless IMO.
Scots_Al is online now  
Old Nov 8, 2015, 2:58 pm
  #58  
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 948
Originally Posted by Scots_Al
Interesting how different people in different places interpret things. I (and I suspect most people this side of the pond) would find a waiter clearing plates away whilst someone at the table is still eating to be incredibly rude. Indeed, as a relatively slow eater, I still can't get used to this practice when I visit the USA - it puts so much pressure on you to eat up and get out (that and bringing the bill unbidden, often without even asking about dessert or coffee).

What was the absolute height of rudeness however, was threatening to throw the plate in the river if it wasn't cleared - obnoxious and classless IMO.
I find that whole comment astonishing, and him refusing to acknowledge who got it wrong is even more entertaining. And I'm thinking many more support your version than his version.

The fact is that as a customer you shouldn't threaten staff simply because you lack maturity, class and style.
theddo is offline  
Old Nov 9, 2015, 8:07 am
  #59  
FlyerTalk Evangelist
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 26,278
Originally Posted by Scots_Al
Interesting how different people in different places interpret things. I (and I suspect most people this side of the pond) would find a waiter clearing plates away whilst someone at the table is still eating to be incredibly rude.
If I'm continuing to eat dinner, I'm at a loss to understand how the waiter removing my wife's empty, dirty dishes qualifies as "rude." I want dirty dishes somewhere else than on my table.

Do you insist that the waiter leave the empty salad plate on the table when he brings the main course? (Assuming, of course, that the salad precedes that main course.)
MaxBuck is offline  
Old Nov 9, 2015, 9:00 am
  #60  
FlyerTalk Evangelist
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: London & Sonoma CA
Programs: UA 1K, MM *G for life, BAEC Gold
Posts: 10,215
Removing others' dishes before everyone has finished is, in my book, one of the rudest things a server can do and immediately means a halving of the tip. However, I do recognise that in the USA they seem to be trained to do it - so I only halve the tip if they continue to do it after I've told them not to.

Of course, real etiquette is for the faster eater to slow down so as not to pile pressure on the slower eater....
lhrsfo is offline  

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Contact Us - Manage Preferences - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service -

This site is owned, operated, and maintained by MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. Copyright © 2024 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Designated trademarks are the property of their respective owners.