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A DYKWIA dining moment

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Old Dec 9, 2011, 1:09 am
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A DYKWIA dining moment

Not sure which forum to post this on..but last night just experienced something surreal and unusual. We're currently vacationing in Rome, last night we went to La Pergola for dinner. Its the only 3* Michelin restaurant in Rome and its inside the Rome Cavalieri.

The couple sitting in the next table, through out the entire meal, they were having a DYKWIA attitude. Returning dishes, scorning at the waiters, and in general being very demanding. So far nothing too unusual, as I guess they are either frequent guests of this restaurant or they are indeed a VIP, as the waiters and maitre'd/manager would constantly come over and ask them if everything was ok.

What was unreal was towards the latter part of dinner, the female diner, who was dolled up to the T, wearing a LV scarf, carrying a Chanel purse, blink blinks to the max. She took out a smallish hardpaper bag that you get from shopping at a relatively higher end store, and proceed to put one of the dinner rolls into the bag. She tried not to make it too obvious, by checking to see if anyone was watching before 'stealing' the bread. Like seriously?

BTW - La Pergola was very good, the food was excellent, especially the desserts. Wow, doing their tasting menu, what they give you for dessert is overwhelming. However, I am not sure if the service would dictate that its a 3* restaurant. Nothing really too bad, but they didn't really offer up or explain the wine offerings, until we asked them, also they were talking pretty louder amongst themselves. They're definitely not up to the same level as the french restaurants.
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Old Dec 9, 2011, 8:50 am
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Originally Posted by Commie
What was unreal was towards the latter part of dinner, the female diner, who was dolled up to the T, wearing a LV scarf, carrying a Chanel purse, blink blinks to the max. She took out a smallish hardpaper bag that you get from shopping at a relatively higher end store, and proceed to put one of the dinner rolls into the bag. She tried not to make it too obvious, by checking to see if anyone was watching before 'stealing' the bread. Like seriously?
At the restaurants I frequent, the server often brings me a to-go bag of the complimentary house bread when she brings back my credit card slip to sign. But I don't generally treat my servers like dirt.

Some people have a strange cultural affectation to treat "servants" like dirt.
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Old Dec 9, 2011, 9:05 am
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Doesn't even have to be a fancy place; I saw a similar story at my favorite neighborhood dive, a Mexican/Salvadorean place with great pupusas, no atmosphere and nothing on the menu over $14. It was a really busy night and they were clearly under-staffed (I think it was the Sunday of a 3-day weekend so they got weekend business but were expecting a quiet Sunday night) and the waiters were really busy. The woman at the next table sent pretty much everything back (including her boyfriend's 3/4-eaten steak), did the whole DYKWIA thing, complained about everything. The owner was at her table constantly and nothing was good enough for her, not even the free meal. When they stormed out, she stole the bottle of hot sauce off the table (a bottle of Tao Patio which usually retails for about $0.89 around here).
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Old Dec 9, 2011, 9:34 am
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As this is focused on dining, let's give this a better airing by moving it to the DiningBuzz forum, with a thread title edit to focus it a bit better. Ocn Vw 1K, Moderator, TravelBuzz.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 7:15 am
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Originally Posted by dcpatti
Doesn't even have to be a fancy place; I saw a similar story at my favorite neighborhood dive, a Mexican/Salvadorean place with great pupusas, no atmosphere and nothing on the menu over $14. It was a really busy night and they were clearly under-staffed (I think it was the Sunday of a 3-day weekend so they got weekend business but were expecting a quiet Sunday night) and the waiters were really busy. The woman at the next table sent pretty much everything back (including her boyfriend's 3/4-eaten steak), did the whole DYKWIA thing, complained about everything. The owner was at her table constantly and nothing was good enough for her, not even the free meal. When they stormed out, she stole the bottle of hot sauce off the table (a bottle of Tao Patio which usually retails for about $0.89 around here).
This disappoints me, but does not surprise me terribly. Anyone who felt it was okay to behave so appallingly probably felt it was entirely acceptable to steal something from the restaurant. I'm sure she felt entitled to it as compensation for what she perceived as sub-standard service.

This is what happens when spoiled children grow up into spoiled adults. She's probably never been smacked down (figuratively) in her entire life.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 8:32 am
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i have no idea what a dykiwa is. maybe an appetizer. not too sure about btw either. do know what lv is as that is part of the moet group. the very wealthy that i know do not have labels on the outside of their belongs. very tacky. maybe russian, or japanese.

i think what you saw is not uncommon when the very wealthy or very famous of europe eat where they are known. such occurances have happened to us many times when eating in a 2 or 3* restaurant.

do know wine, however. did you expect them to "but they didn't really offer up or explain the wine offerings, until we asked them"

Winner of the "Grand Award" from the Wine Spectator since 2004, more than 53,000 bottles, over 3,000 labels, a cellar divided into a number of individually air-conditioned areas, a collection on a vast scale, wines from 1888 to the present day, them bottles?

i presume there is a wine person there who can , but do you really have the time?
i once asked the list in a paris 2*. the list was 40 pages long(single spaced). found a great 20 yo Madiran to go with my lievra royale for about €10-15 after 15 min of reading. this list is probably only 1500 entrys.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 8:37 am
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Not sure what you mean by very wealthy don't like labels etc, but have worked for and still work for billionaires, mostly very high profile, royalty and political. Gucci, Harrods, Louis Vuitton etc feature very highly on the list of shops frequented by almost all of those i've worked for.
Expectations during dining can be high, if not unreasonable, although generally their staff (i.e people like me) speak to the restaurants about this privately rather then themselves.

But, everyone is individual, and you can't say that ALL people are like this or that.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 9:54 am
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Originally Posted by slawecki
i have no idea what a dykiwa is. maybe an appetizer. not too sure about btw either.
DYKWIA: do you know who I am?

BTW: by the way
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 10:41 am
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Originally Posted by Yachtman
slawecki
Not sure what you mean by very wealthy don't like labels etc, but have worked for and still work for billionaires, mostly very high profile, royalty and political. Gucci, Harrods, Louis Vuitton etc feature very highly on the list of shops frequented by almost all of those i've worked for.
Expectations during dining can be high, if not unreasonable, although generally their staff (i.e people like me) speak to the restaurants about this privately rather then themselves.

But, everyone is individual, and you can't say that ALL people are like this or that.
what i mean is they do not wear the labels on the outside of their clothing. not many large hermes labels on ties,scarfs or leathers seen when worn. different than the lauren crowd.

i went into harrods once about 8-10 years ago. i cannot imagine anyone who can afford to would go in the place. it was packed to the gills.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 11:35 am
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Just because you are spending a lot of money doesn't give one a right to treat people poorly. There are people with money who are respectful to everyone and those who are disrespectful to everyone. I think it has a lot to do with your upbringing and values taught as a child.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 12:11 pm
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Here's a sort of reverse DYKWIA story. My wife and I were in a restaurant in Hong Kong and received truly extraordinary service. We were quite impressed, as it was a good but not a particularly fancy or expensive place. As we were leaving, a waiter came up to my wife, told her they knew she was a movie star but they couldn't remember her name and asked for her autograph.

As you can imagine, that not only made her day but the rest of the trip. No, she didn't play along a give them the autograph, but fortunately we did leave a nice tip.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 1:29 pm
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Could be part of the "fake it 'till you make it" crowd. I've met people decked out in the most exclusive couture labels with credit card debt that rivals most mortgages. On the opposite end of the scale, once sat next to a gentleman on a domestic AA flight. He was dressed in Gap jeans and a polo shirt. Clean cut, low-key, and one of the friendliest people I've ever met. Found out later he is just shy of being a billionaire.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 1:45 pm
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For good reasons a guest`s fashion choice doesn`t decide about which restaurant will be awarded with a Michelin star.

But at a place like the one in Rome I would expect the Sommelier to explain the wine choices for a set menue.
Or at least they are introduced by the waitress / waiter with the menue at the beginning of the dinner.
No matter how many wines a restaurant caters, the proper handling of the wine service is an assessment criterion.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 2:05 pm
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Cool

Behavior like this simply reflects poor upbringing.

I empathize with proprietors who have to deal with it.
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Old Dec 10, 2011, 3:34 pm
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Originally Posted by slawecki
i have no idea what a dykiwa is. maybe an appetizer. not too sure about btw either. do know what lv is as that is part of the moet group. the very wealthy that i know do not have labels on the outside of their belongs. very tacky. maybe russian, or japanese.

do know wine, however. did you expect them to "but they didn't really offer up or explain the wine offerings, until we asked them"

Winner of the "Grand Award" from the Wine Spectator since 2004, more than 53,000 bottles, over 3,000 labels, a cellar divided into a number of individually air-conditioned areas, a collection on a vast scale, wines from 1888 to the present day, them bottles?

i presume there is a wine person there who can , but do you really have the time?
i once asked the list in a paris 2*. the list was 40 pages long(single spaced). found a great 20 yo Madiran to go with my lievra royale for about €10-15 after 15 min of reading. this list is probably only 1500 entrys.
Not sure what you mean by the wealthy not wearing labels...but the LV monograms are pretty noticeable, and the 1% crowd definitely wear them, carry their purses, or their luggages. Same for the famous 'CC' logo of Chanel...Its subtle but its there....I agree they are not into wearing the 'American' logos plastered everywhere.

As for the wine....I wasn't expecting the sommelier to read off every single bottle of wine they have. I have fair knowledge of wine myself, with my own wine cellar.
What I do expect is when I am ready to order my meal, to have the sommelier offer the wine options that he can pair with the 9 course tasting menu. In fact neither the waiter nor the sommelier even mention anything about any wine that they offer up.
I had to ask the waiter for the wine menu, then it was offered. Gotta admit it was pretty extensive list....and prices are not too bad compared to the normal markup i see in Toronto restaurants. Ended up with a bottle of the 2001 Tignanello, very nice indeed.
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