Flight of the Conchords - Eugene Mirman and Delta
Apr 27, 2009, 5:31 pm
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Flight of the Conchords - Eugene Mirman and Delta
So, I'm a huge Flight of the Conchords fan (of the HBO show of the same title) and am taking the opportunity to see them as much as I can on their current US tour. Throughout the tour, various other supporting cast members are opening up the show with their standup. The current cast member is Eugene Mirman, who plays "Eugene" - the landlord, on the show. For approximately 12 minutes of his 30 minute set, he makes Delta his primary target. As I've sat through 4 of his sets I can pretty much recite it word for word (he doesn't change, even when his props no longer work...).
For what it's worth, here ya go..... (Apologies for being long, but again, it was the majority of his set.)
*****************
I flew from Seattle to New York a few months ago on Delta and when I landed, I went to the baggage claim and watched it go round and round and my bag never came. So I went to the counter and handed the lady my boarding pass with the claim sticker on it. She then looks at me and asks, "How do you pronounce your name? I reply "Eugene Mirman. Why? How do YOU pronounce it??" She replies, "It isn't Barbara Riddle?" to which I respond, "No! none of those sounds match any of the letters in my name!" She says, "wqe must've left your stuff in Seattle we'll get it to you tomorrow."
So the next day comes and delta comes to my house and brings me Barbara Riddle's things. I tell them they're nice, but not mine. I send them back. The next day, Delta comes again...with Barbara Riddle's stuff. I again tell them that the undies are too tight plus I had some great blueberry jam that I bought and really wanted.
So after this I start calling Delta and recording our conversations because I know that they'll deny them, and in the end Delta says that they can't find my things, it's dead to us, and that I should fill out a claim form and I'll get some of the value of my stuff back. Then, not a week later I get an email from Barbara Riddle's son-in-law. Delta apparently came to his house in the dead of night, left my things on his front porch, and hightailed it out of there. So he was very nice and offered to send them up to me and I said yes.
Not an hour later, DL calls and says that they know where my stuff is! No ...., I say - so do I! They said that I couldn't trust this guy and that I had to let them pick up my stuff, insure it and send it to me instead of this guy. I say fine and give them one more chance.
A few weeks go by and I call Delta and ask them about the picking up, etc and they say that they have no idea what I'm talking about. They never found my things and I filled out a claim form. They were sending a check. I email Barbara Riddle's son-in-law, and sure enough my things are still on his porch.
So i wrote Delta a nasty letter and I want to share it with you:
For what it's worth, here ya go..... (Apologies for being long, but again, it was the majority of his set.)
*****************
I flew from Seattle to New York a few months ago on Delta and when I landed, I went to the baggage claim and watched it go round and round and my bag never came. So I went to the counter and handed the lady my boarding pass with the claim sticker on it. She then looks at me and asks, "How do you pronounce your name? I reply "Eugene Mirman. Why? How do YOU pronounce it??" She replies, "It isn't Barbara Riddle?" to which I respond, "No! none of those sounds match any of the letters in my name!" She says, "wqe must've left your stuff in Seattle we'll get it to you tomorrow."
So the next day comes and delta comes to my house and brings me Barbara Riddle's things. I tell them they're nice, but not mine. I send them back. The next day, Delta comes again...with Barbara Riddle's stuff. I again tell them that the undies are too tight plus I had some great blueberry jam that I bought and really wanted.
So after this I start calling Delta and recording our conversations because I know that they'll deny them, and in the end Delta says that they can't find my things, it's dead to us, and that I should fill out a claim form and I'll get some of the value of my stuff back. Then, not a week later I get an email from Barbara Riddle's son-in-law. Delta apparently came to his house in the dead of night, left my things on his front porch, and hightailed it out of there. So he was very nice and offered to send them up to me and I said yes.
Not an hour later, DL calls and says that they know where my stuff is! No ...., I say - so do I! They said that I couldn't trust this guy and that I had to let them pick up my stuff, insure it and send it to me instead of this guy. I say fine and give them one more chance.
A few weeks go by and I call Delta and ask them about the picking up, etc and they say that they have no idea what I'm talking about. They never found my things and I filled out a claim form. They were sending a check. I email Barbara Riddle's son-in-law, and sure enough my things are still on his porch.
So i wrote Delta a nasty letter and I want to share it with you:
Dear Delta,
I HATE YOU!! You're an awful airline that's messed up the last three times I traveled, and two of them were by train. Here's why I'm upset: you lost my luggage. Here's why I hate you:
I talked with 7 different customer service people for hours. They all lied to me and destroyed any evidence of our conversations. Dealing with Delta is like hiring an insincere baby with amnesia to solve a crime IT committed. Plus I think you have customer service people in India but make them use American names. Trevor....really? Trever Bakahnagar.
When I was in the ticket counter in SEA I asked if I could have an upgrade. The woman said I couldn't with a Class "L" ticket. Now I didn't know about the different classes of tickets, but apparently the L in Class L means, LLLLLL - F#$# you. I'd like to thank you for finding a convenient way to recreate for all Americans what it must've been like to be black in 1955. Zing.
The last time I wanted to see an organization fail as much as yours was Al Qaeda. Do you know who they are? No?? they're an organization hell bent on destroying the US. Sound familiar? It's based upon your business model.
So another month goes by and I received my claim check; so I took it, and cashed it and made thousands of postcards for you to send to Delta. Here's what you wrote:I HATE YOU!! You're an awful airline that's messed up the last three times I traveled, and two of them were by train. Here's why I'm upset: you lost my luggage. Here's why I hate you:
I talked with 7 different customer service people for hours. They all lied to me and destroyed any evidence of our conversations. Dealing with Delta is like hiring an insincere baby with amnesia to solve a crime IT committed. Plus I think you have customer service people in India but make them use American names. Trevor....really? Trever Bakahnagar.
When I was in the ticket counter in SEA I asked if I could have an upgrade. The woman said I couldn't with a Class "L" ticket. Now I didn't know about the different classes of tickets, but apparently the L in Class L means, LLLLLL - F#$# you. I'd like to thank you for finding a convenient way to recreate for all Americans what it must've been like to be black in 1955. Zing.
The last time I wanted to see an organization fail as much as yours was Al Qaeda. Do you know who they are? No?? they're an organization hell bent on destroying the US. Sound familiar? It's based upon your business model.
Dear Delta Airlines,
My name is ________. I am a fan of comedian and actor Eugene "horsedick" Mirman (who you may recognize from his small, recurring role on HBO's Flight of the Conchords). Mr. Mirman flew on your airline from Seattle to New York, where you lost his luggage.
Quick exposition: you delivered his luggage twice to the wrong address in Atlanta, GA, refused to pick it up, then said you would pick it up, then never came, and then told him to file a claim and wait to hear back within 10 weeks.
Eugene described his traumatic incident with your terrible airline on stage. As a result, I will never ever ever ever fly with you again. your airline is worse than someone dressing up like Hitler as a joke and not understanding why that's offensive. If your airline were drowning, I would save you, but give you a look like, "I can't believe I'm saving such an ........"
To make things right, if I were you, I'd formally apologize to Eugene on television, give him controlling stock in Delta Airlines or $10,000 (whichever is greater), and lastly make a video of yourself hitting yourself in the balls while going, "Why am I hitting myself?" and put it on youtube.
yours truly, _______
My name is ________. I am a fan of comedian and actor Eugene "horsedick" Mirman (who you may recognize from his small, recurring role on HBO's Flight of the Conchords). Mr. Mirman flew on your airline from Seattle to New York, where you lost his luggage.
Quick exposition: you delivered his luggage twice to the wrong address in Atlanta, GA, refused to pick it up, then said you would pick it up, then never came, and then told him to file a claim and wait to hear back within 10 weeks.
Eugene described his traumatic incident with your terrible airline on stage. As a result, I will never ever ever ever fly with you again. your airline is worse than someone dressing up like Hitler as a joke and not understanding why that's offensive. If your airline were drowning, I would save you, but give you a look like, "I can't believe I'm saving such an ........"
To make things right, if I were you, I'd formally apologize to Eugene on television, give him controlling stock in Delta Airlines or $10,000 (whichever is greater), and lastly make a video of yourself hitting yourself in the balls while going, "Why am I hitting myself?" and put it on youtube.
yours truly, _______
Last edited by MemphisQueen; Apr 28, 2009 at 12:40 pm
Apr 27, 2009, 6:49 pm
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Good grief. You must have an awful lot of time on your hands.
Apr 27, 2009, 7:47 pm
#3
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Great! Is Murray doing stand-up as well? I love Moo-ray.
Apr 27, 2009, 8:20 pm
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I have no idea who that person/character is, but that was funny!
Apr 27, 2009, 11:20 pm
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Saw him at the show in MSN yesterday and that's pretty much how it played out. He also passed out some stacks of his postcards though I didn't get one.
Apr 28, 2009, 12:38 pm
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Kristen schaal (aka mel) opened the first leg. I nearly died with laughter when she did her set. I knew it would be good since "mel's" vlogs crack me up. This leg is Eugene and next is Arj barker (aka Dave). I didn't see rhys Darby (murray) on the list.
Rhys has a DVD of his standup recorded in LA that I bought when I was in New Zealand last year (haven't seen it for sale in the US). Parts of it were funny but for the most part I was disappointed. I think the "band meeting" stuff is the funniest of his ive seen since most of that is ad libbed.
Rhys has a DVD of his standup recorded in LA that I bought when I was in New Zealand last year (haven't seen it for sale in the US). Parts of it were funny but for the most part I was disappointed. I think the "band meeting" stuff is the funniest of his ive seen since most of that is ad libbed.
Apr 28, 2009, 8:15 pm
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I don't know about on the FOTC tour, but Rhys Darby (Murray) is indeed a stand-up comedian.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WTxAx7kdqbs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxO94S6tMLM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zw6m70UPpPQ
I love The Best Of Murray
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDjJc_ZH6dk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WTxAx7kdqbs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxO94S6tMLM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zw6m70UPpPQ
I love The Best Of Murray
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDjJc_ZH6dk
Apr 28, 2009, 9:41 pm
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I don't know about on the FOTC tour, but Rhys Darby (Murray) is indeed a stand-up comedian.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WTxAx7kdqbs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxO94S6tMLM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zw6m70UPpPQ
I love The Best Of Murray
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDjJc_ZH6dk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WTxAx7kdqbs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxO94S6tMLM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zw6m70UPpPQ
I love The Best Of Murray
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDjJc_ZH6dk
I got one of Eugene's postcards from the Toronto show. I'll try to get a scan up for everyone to see -- the illustration is pretty funny too.
Apr 28, 2009, 9:42 pm
#10
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Whoops... nevermind. I just googled an image of it.
