cbc812

Mrs. cbc812 and I are flying LAX-SYD this weekend with 10 week old cbc812 Jr. He is a great baby - wonderful temperament, minimally fussy, already sleeping 7-9 hours at a stretch through the night. We are nevertheless pretty anxious about the lengthy flight and anticipate that the little guy will be vocal about hunger/diaper/air pressure/etc.

We have a plan for each of the above scenarios, but we're weighing putting together goodie bags for the folks around us with earplugs, candies, chocolate, and good tea and a note that it's our little booger's first flight. Opinion on this move varies widely; some say you shouldn't apologize for having a child, others that it's a considerate gesture, especially on a lengthy flight.

I find myself in the latter camp, but am wondering what FTers think. WNBFP (Want no babies? Fly private!)? Or go for it? What say you?

pvn

It IS a considerate gesture, but I wouldn't do it. Not doing it isn't inconsiderate. If people need a bribe to be decent human beings, then it's really unlikely that the bribe will actually work.

Chalky White

Agree with PVN. It certainly would be nice, but I wouldn't do it, and I travel frequently with my young child. If people have a problem with it, they need to fly private, as you say.

mpheels

I think it's a very kind gesture, but I am wary of the emerging trend overall because I don't think parents need to apologize for the existence of their children. I'm not bothered by normal baby/child behaviors or noises, so long as the parent(s) are doing their best to care for and respond to the child's needs.

At ten weeks old, your baby will probably sleep most of the time, and doesn't yet have the ability to screech like a toddler. Be prepared for pressure changes (feed him during take off and landing), and be proactive with diaper changes.

Perhaps you can take the middle road - bring earplugs and treats, but only give them out if needed.

FlyingBeanCounter

Well, I was a single flyer for over 40 years, and I was always annoyed by kids. I know it is a bit unfair, but I always thought that parents should be held strictly accountable for their children.

Then I started dating someone with kids. we have taken the ony year old to four continents already (including a side trip to the maldives). I can now see why parents sometimes seem less than atentive.

So, with that in mind I am going to offer these suggestions:

1. Acknowledging your child could be fussy is an awesome idea. I know when I was childless I would look much more favorably on people who were actively and aggressively trying to maintain calm with their kid. The goodie bags are an easy way to let people know you are those types of parents. Kudos and good idea.

2. Be prepared to be awake for up to 36 hours. When we took two kids (one a year old and the other five years old) to India I was awake for 40 straight hours managing the kids. On the way home, we went straight from the maldives to the US. That was about 48 hours total travel time (with 14 hours in BLR). I had the one year old on my own from paris to Denver for the last part of that trip. It was ROUGH.

Widgets

I might feel uncomfortable getting a goody bag, but I'm the socially awkward type that isn't used to being noticed on a flight. Noise-cancelling headphones and earplugs have existed for a long time. Babies are a reasonable, foreseeable thing that passengers should be prepared for.

FlyingBeanCounter

One other thought -

You might want to consider having yourself or your wife start a fashion blog. That way if your child goes wild and you get hassled by DL you can blog about it and get some free stuff.

355F1

Do they make baby Ambien....??? 🤔

Zorak

Yes, although on airplanes it can be found in mini-bottles with different labels on them

BenA

In my experience, the "goodie bag" trick has typically been employed by parents who don't care about how their child impacts other passengers to absolve their guilt: they tend to let their kids run wild, thinking they've done their due diligence by compensating people for their inconsiderate nature. Every time I see them being handed out, I brace myself for a terrible flight.

Not accusing you of doing that! But I think the passengers around you will appreciate far more if you bring enough toys, distractions, and supplies to keep your little one entertained and quiet so the people around you can actually get some sleep on what for most people is a night flight. If they get fussy, get up and hang out in the galley for a while to minimize the distraction, etc...

You should also consider that on an international flight in Y, all passengers receive eyeshades and earplugs anyway, which are the two most relevant items you might consider providing in a bag that might actually help with the situation.

BenA

(That said, if you're planning on traveling with your child as a lap infant rather than in their own seat, the third person in your row is getting a very, very raw deal. Something specifically for that person might be considerate.)

pvn

hahahah nice

vincentharris

I think its nice, and I wouldnt be bothered if a baby does what a baby does. In other words a goodie bag is a nice gesture, and i would think it would be nice but i would just be as fine without getting one too.

Are BABIES going to cry??? YES!!!!!!!! I am sure I did when I was flying as an infant.

I think my problem, and I bet most would agree with me here is not the X Month old, or 1/2 year old. Its the 5, 6, 10, 11 etc year olds who act entitled and play loud music, scream, run around like idiots, etc. with NO parental intervention (because their kids are special)

I spent a good bit of my 0-17 (pre adult years) in airplanes flying coast to coast. You know what I did on flights? sat in my seat, did homework, and watched movies? (I also liked to go hang out in the big couch seat thing Continental had at their bar up at the front of the plane) though again I sat there and drank my shirley temples while hanging out.

Kids who are at the 5+ age have soooo many distractions available now (iPads, ISE, iPhones, etc.) they should be able to sit like everyone else, the only issue I see now is parents refusing to be parents and be best friends with their kids.

sogi

This.

Was recently on a flight in the row ahead of a pair of tantruming kids. If you think babies are bad... turns out by ages 2 and 4 respectively, their volume and stamina increases quite a bit.

That said, after putting on ear plugs, then a noise cancelling headset outside of those ear plugs, turning on music so I can hear through the ear plugs at a reasonable volume - I couldn't hear the two of them at all. Only felt them through them kicking my neighbor's seat.

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Despite the fact I wasn't really inconvenienced, I was quite upset at this family. Because while the mother was managing the two kids behind our row, while the father was across the aisle in a row by himself doing absolutely nothing. And pretending his family didn't exist.

I'd like to re-iterate that crying babies are a fact of life. However, I think it's in the effort of the parents to distract and comfort the children, that makes the difference of opinion.

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Goodie bags, prepared distractions, active comforting are all signs of effort. That's the part that helps. Not the actual contents.

FlyingBeanCounter

As a reformed kid hater I agree that parents who acknowledge their child is disrupting the chi of those around them are so much harder to glare at.

Conversely, when people glared at me with the screaming one year old I totally understood why.