It was a most interesting day. (Kevinsac, you erred in your timing. Israel is 7 hours ahead of the East Coast, so lucky posted at 11:18 pm on Dec 11, not Dec 10).
By that time, of course, my birthday was almost over -- and given the problems I had, it was undoubtedly for the best.
To start with, I got an e-mail from Cholula demanding that I reimburse him for the $25,000 that my reaching age 63 had cost him. Apparently, in hopes of making a quick buck, when he heard last May that I was going in for bypass surgery he ran out and spent that amount in premiums on a term life insurance policy on me, naming himself as sole beneficiary. It expired when I reached my birthday alive, and Cholula is furious.
Randy Petersen, as you might have noticed, marked my birthday by shutting down FlyerTalk for five hours.
Then Former BAG (Former Beautiful American Girlfriend) sent me a PM telling me how happy she is not to be my girlfriend any longer. The UIG (my Used Italian Girlfriend) called me from Milan to say that she is arriving in Tel Aviv next week -- and asking me to stay far away from her.
Our family doctor had told Dementia, my ex, that if I don't watch my diet and my smoking, I could kick the bucket -- so she showed up early in the day with a big chocolate birthday cake and a carton of cigarettes.
My daughter called to ask me what I was going to buy her for my birthday.
Being a bit depressed by all of this, I decided to cheer myself up with a cognac. I didn't feel like drinking alone, however, and attached a mini bottle of Remy Martin to a rather large skyrocket and aimed it at BEYFlyer's window.
Well! From the reaction that got, you would think that sending rockets shooting across the border could start problems or something!
Within moments, hundreds of missiles were shot back in return fire and then Israel launched a few thousand of its own. Fortunately, the regular rocket people on both sides were on vacation and their replacements were lousy shots, so nobody was injured.
Still, this did not satisfy the Shin Bet. (For those of you who are not familiar with it, the Shin Bet is Israel's equivalent of the FBI, but because we are a small country it can only afford two initials.)
I was dragged off to prison while government officials debated what to do about me. The Foreign Minister wanted to take away my passport, saying that letting me visit other countries could hurt Israel's diplomatic relations. The Interior Minister, however, refused. He said it was in the country's best interests for me not to be in it as much as possible.
It is now 6 am here, meaning that Dec 11 has only one more hour to go in Brooklyn (where the whole thing started in 1945), so I had better not waste any more time in posting this. I would hate to miss my own birthday!
It is now 6 am here, meaning that Dec 11 has only one more hour to go in Brooklyn (where the whole thing started in 1945), so I had better not waste any more time in posting this. I would hate to miss my own birthday!
December 11 still has hours to run here in Hawaii, Dov, so I'll be toasting your birthday in a bit (cocktail hour is barely underway)! Hope you had a great day!
I just didn't know it's because of you, Dov!
Happy Birthday
Enjoy and all the best from your neighbor up North. Take care.
