Trip Reports - Seattle to Anchorage ~ Detailssss




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Seat 2A
Dec 31, 01, 10:17 pm
On December 29th I flew from Seattle to Anchorage. This was supposed to be a round trip, but so far I am still stuck in Anchorage. More on that later. Here is my trip report…

This was a big trip for me as I was excited to be going to Alaska. As such, I wanted to be up early so that I could arrive at the airport on time for my 7:19am departure from Seattle.

I set my alarm clock for 4:19 am, three hours in advance of my flight. Unfortunately, I was so excited to be going on this trip that I didn’t actually fall asleep until 1:06am. When my alarm went off, I pushed the “snooze” button which allowed me an extra nine minutes of sleep. I used up every minute of it and my feet touched the floor at 4:29am.

I had called the taxi company the night before and requested that they be at my apartment at 4:57am. I live exactly 6.3 miles from the airport (6.4 if I were flying NW) and had estimated that leaving at that time would get me to the airline ticket counter exactly two hours ahead of time. Well, the lady working at the taxi company was very rude. She laughed at me and said that they would come at “around” 5:00am or 4:45am if I wanted them there earlier, but not at 4:57am. Reluctantly, I settled upon 5:ish but I tell you this was distressing and contributed to my not falling asleep until 1:06am even though my head hit the pillow at 11:43pm, just as Jay Leno was launching into the 6th joke of his monologue.

Thankfully, the taxi actually arrived at 4:59am. One of the best things about driving to the airport this early in the morning is that there is very little traffic. I counted only 128 cars along the way and 7 of the 11 stoplights that we went through were green!!

I entered the airport at 5:18am and presented myself at the counter at precisely 5:19am, exactly 2 hours before my flight. I was expecting that when the agent checked me in and saw my departure time, she’d be pleased at my punctuality. Instead, she greeted me and said “You’re certainly here early!”

“Early?” I asked. “But I was told to be here two hours in advance.”
“Well,” she replied, “that’s for flights at the busier times. This time of day you can get here a bit later.” She checked in my bag (I asked her to weigh it for me and it came out to 37.93 pounds) and issued me my boarding pass. She told me that the flight would be boarding 20 minutes before departure at gate D7.

“I’ll be there at 6:59am!” I told her.
“I’m sure you will.” she replied, looking at me somewhat strangely. I thought perhaps she might have had a headache or perhaps a bit of gas but I grabbed my carry-on bag and headed for security.

I breezed through security and walked down to Gate D7. Along the way I stopped at a Seattle’s Best Coffee kiosk and purchased a 12oz coffee for $1.69. It took me 7 minutes to walk to the gate and once there, I found a copy of the Anchorage Daily News. It was from the day before but I was excited to read about anything Alaskan right now. In the B section, on page 5, there was an article about a lady in Ketchikan who had locked her husband in a closet and sucked ALL the air out through a straw! Wow! It took her two and a half days! I guess they must have had some problems…

Although I was ready to board at 6:59am, the gate agents did not announce boarding until 7:01am. I swallowed my disappointment and waited for my row number to be called. Finally, at 7:05am I was able to board and, after presenting my ID at the door, walked onto the aircraft.

Today’s aircraft was a 737-4Q8, registration number N772BS, the 2505th 737 off the assembly line. In the interests of providing proper detail to this report, I had meant to check above the door and see when the FAA certificate had been issued but there were some pushy people behind me when I tried to stop and check this so I kept on going. Sorry about that, everyone.

My seat number was 12F. In the seat pocket were the airline’s magazine, a Sky Mall catalogue, an air sickness bag, a Seat Occupied card and a gum wrapper. My seat reclined approximately 3.5 inches. I would guess seat pitch was 31”. I was annoyed at myself that I did not think to bring my tape measurer to provide you with a more exact figure. Please forgive me. As I mentioned earlier, I only got 3 hours and 22 minutes of sleep last night.

There were 8 passengers in First Class and 43 in Coach. As the load was light, I asked if I could see the cockpit. There, I asked the crew how much fuel we were going to load, how much we were going to use, how strong the headwinds would be, what altitude we’d be cruising at, etc. At first the pilots were very friendly but then, when I asked them how much fuel we’d have leftover upon arrival in Anchorage they got this look on their faces just like the ticket counter agent and told me I’d have to return to my seat as we’d be leaving soon. I wondered if perhaps a virus was going around and asked them if they were OK. They nodded profusely and had one of the flight attendants walk me back to my seat.

The doors were closed at precisely 7:14am. We taxied out on taxiway 14A and, after 6 minutes of taxiing (5 min. 48 sec. actually), the First Officer came on over the PA and told us our flight time to Anchorage would be 3 hours and 21 minutes with headwinds of almost 150 mph. When I was talking to them on the flightdeck, they told me our headwinds would be 145 mph! What’s up? Oh well, they also announced that we’d be taking off into a 26 mph head wind.

We took our position at the head of Runway 23R at 7:28am and, at 7:29am we began our take off roll. Runway 23R is listed at 12,270 feet long. We started our take off roll approximately 60 feet from the end of the runway. It took us 28 seconds to take off and based upon the performance figures for these CFM56-3C1 engines, coupled with our load today, and the headwind, I deduced that we’d used up approximately 9,173 feet of runway before reaching V1 and rotating skyward. I’m sorry I couldn’t be more precise but I can only work with the information the crew was willing to give me before making me return to my seat.

Our flight attendants today were Jim, Heather, Carolyn and Leigh. Carolyn was from San Diego originally, and was born on October 17th, 1976. Heather was about to tell me her birthday and work schedule but then Jim made them all come back to the galley for something. After that, though I noticed the flight attendants seemed attentive to my needs, it was in a strange way. They didn’t come by my seat all that often on their own, but they did spend a lot of time glancing in my direction. Still, anytime I needed anything, I needed only ask and they’d come right over. I tried to ask Jim when his birthday was for purposes of accuracy in this report but he suddenly became distracted by something farther back in the plane and hurried off to deal with it. He did tell me he was from the northern part of America though…

Service started 8 minutes after take-off. I had a coffee and a glass of orange juice. Then meal choices were announced – scrambled eggs with chives or cold cereal. 28 ½ minutes after take-off, I received my cereal. On a 10” X 12” tray I received a bowl of Cheerios, a container of blueberry yogurt, a small muffin and a 6oz container of milk. I had written down the total calorie count from my calorie counter book that I brought along but somehow I lost them. They're probably added to all the stuff in the seat back pocket, something for the next passenger to read about. Well, suffice to say that the meal was very tasty.

Although I managed to eat my meal in only 5 ½ minutes, it took another 23 minutes for the flight attendants to collect my tray. In the meantime, my seatmate cut off 5/8ths of his muffin. I think he meant to cut it in half but it looked like 5/8ths to me. After awhile, when it became obvious that he wasn’t going to eat the rest of it, I asked him if he wanted the other 3/8ths of his muffin. He too gave me an odd look but said I could have the rest of his muffin if I wanted. I swear something must be going around. All these people around me look ill. So far I feel fine but when I get to Anchorage I am going to load up on some echinacea as I don’t want to catch whatever’s bothering all these people I’ve been running into.

Some turbulence occurred at 8:17am and lasted for 3 minutes and 17 seconds. We got one particularly strong jolt and I spilled approximately 2oz of my coffee on my tray and onto my slacks. I would have been able to grab my coffee but I was adjusting my watch so I could time the turbulence. My dry cleaner will charge me $4.75 plus 7% state sales tax to remove that stain. Expensive turbulence!

Over the rest of the flight, it was cloudy and so there wasn’t much to see. I read 87 pages from my book, Lefkowicz on Chess and we began our approach into Anchorage at 9:23am AST. We broke through the clouds and flew west past the city of Anchorage before circling around and landing to the east on Runway 18L. We landed at 9:58am, taxied 8 minutes to the gate and shut the engines down at 10:09am. It took them 18 seconds to totally spool down. Unfortunately, it took 4 minutes and 31 seconds for the gate agents to get the jetway situated and our doors open.

On the way off the aircraft, I again stopped by the flight deck and tried to explain to the Captain that I was writing a trip report and that readers might like to know how much fuel we had burned and how many flights it had been since this airplane’s last C check. He said that he really was sorry but that he had a meeting to get to and perhaps on my next flight he would be able to get me this information. I thanked him and headed into the terminal. I was just heading down to Baggage Claim when suddenly it occurred to me that I wouldn’t have any way of knowing whether or not he would be my pilot on my next flight.

I went to the ticket counter and tried to get the directions to Operations so I could find this pilot and get his work schedule. I had a flight coming up on the 31st at 2:40pm. The agent working the desk asked me why I wanted to know all of this information about the pilot and I told her about these flight reports, etc. She told me that they don’t give out that kind of information but that the next pilots would no doubt be very capable and if I got to the gate early enough, etc. I then asked if maybe she might give me the number for corporate headquarters so that I could save some time and maybe get all this information in advance. Perhaps I could even get this pilot’s work schedule sent to me. She asked me to wait at the desk and went through a door into the back room. I waited and waited. Then, after 7 ¾ minutes I suddenly was surrounded by three big airport policemen. I barely had time to glance at my chronograph and note the time that they’d arrived before they made me come with them to their office downstairs.

Now, I am sitting in a holding cell in downtown Anchorage. The cell is 6 feet by 10 feet and the service is nowhere near as good as aboard the airline. They say I am being held for questioning on suspicion of terroristic activities. The FBI will be arriving in 16 minutes to talk with me. Also, for some reason they are sending a psychiatrist to talk with me as well. I told them I had to fly back to Seattle in two days but they said that I may be here a bit longer than that.

So folks, I guess this means that it could be a little longer than anticipated before I get to post my next trip report. I asked the police how long they thought I’d have to stay here and they told me to be quiet. Finally, after 13 minutes, one of them told me it would be at least 4 days and 7 hours because of the New Years holiday and the fact that the local psychiatrist was on vacation in Dutch Harbor. Oh well. At least I still have 879 pages left to read in Lefkowicz on Chess


[This message has been edited by Seat 2A (edited 01-01-2002).]


stef315
Dec 31, 01, 11:56 pm
You are kidding aren't you????

I can't believe anyone could be THAT detailed?

Err...do you need bailed out? http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif

missydarlin
Jan 1, 02, 1:16 am
STEP AWAY FROM THE CRACK PIPE ELTON

What a very rich fantasy life you have... http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/wink.gif ...Great story!!

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Get treated like the Goddess that you are


LLZ
Jan 1, 02, 3:29 am
I think Seat2A should be working security! (at a substantial increase of pay http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/wink.gif

Salisbury5
Jan 1, 02, 7:22 am
What an absolutely wonderful trip report - a fantastic Happy New Year's gift! I haven't laughed that hard in months.

Thanks so much!

ScottC
Jan 1, 02, 7:38 am
ROTFLMAO!!! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/biggrin.gif Thanks for getting me laughing!

Ocean1971
Jan 1, 02, 8:32 am
<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Originally posted by Seat 2A:
We broke through the clouds and flew west past the city of Anchorage before circling around and landing to the east on Runway 18L. </font>

If you landed on runway 18L, then you landed to the South, not east.

(edited to correct quote and bolding)


[This message has been edited by Ocean1971 (edited 01-01-2002).]

[This message has been edited by Ocean1971 (edited 01-01-2002).]

tfung
Jan 1, 02, 12:27 pm
haha... VERY VERY detailed report.... I hope that some of the details were made up though.. I certainly had a little laugh.. http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif

FlyByMike
Jan 1, 02, 1:40 pm
<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Originally posted by Seat 2A:
Now, I am sitting in a holding cell in downtown Anchorage.</font>

Jail with Flyertalk? Can't be all that bad...

jan_az
Jan 1, 02, 2:23 pm
And another keyboard bites the dust!!!


Way too funny

Happy New Year

BizJet
Jan 1, 02, 6:39 pm
Very amusing!! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/biggrin.gif http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/biggrin.gif

Seat 2A
Jan 2, 02, 4:03 am
<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Originally posted by Ocean1971:
If you landed on runway 18L, then you landed to the South, not east.</font>

Names, characters, places and incidents, not to mention runways are products of newly committed Alaska State Mental Hospital patient #13497B's vivid imagination. Any resemblance to actual airlines, airports, runways, or airline personnel, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Please do not give any more information to this patient about ANYTHING! He is way overstimulated and needs his rest

Dr. LaPhonso S. Pinchuck
Attending Physician
Psychiatric Ward



[This message has been edited by Seat 2A (edited 01-02-2002).]

Clement Lowe
Jan 2, 02, 4:36 am
VERY funny! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif My next trip report will attempt to be that detailed, I'll TRY! LOL http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif

Clement

swag
Jan 2, 02, 8:47 am
http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif

May I suggest that at your next pre-flight visit to Seattle's Best, you try the decaf?

chexfan
Jan 2, 02, 10:38 am
<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Originally posted by Seat 2A:
I would guess seat pitch was 31”. I was annoyed at myself that I did not think to bring my tape measurer to provide you with a more exact figure. Please forgive me.</font>I guess you know what to add on your "Don't Forget List" for your next trip! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/biggrin.gif

Thanks for the early morning chuckles!

Explore
Jan 2, 02, 12:27 pm
A gentle reminder to a recent poster not to be TOO technical? http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/smile.gif

As a less technical sort, I'll follow the hint and feel free to omit aircraft registration numbers as well as runway descriptors....

toadman
Jan 2, 02, 1:30 pm
Details! Are you kidding? What was the name of the cab co.? The name of the cab driver? His/her age? What type of cab? Model and serial number? How fast was the cab going? How much fuel did the cab use to get you to the airport? The MPG? Did you tip the cabbie?

How many people were at the airport at gate D7? Did you think to audit the number at the gate with the number who actually boarded the plane? What was the gross takeoff weight? What about the air temp. and dew point at takeoff. What was the takeoff distance and airspeed at wheels up? Wind direction?

Did the APD infringe on your civil liberties? Details, we need details I tell you! I feel like I've been left hanging here? I hope there is a prologue to all of this! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/wink.gif

Seat 2A
Jan 13, 02, 8:05 pm
When last heard from, Seat 2A was resting comfortably, facing terrorism inquiries and ensconced in the Anchorage State Mental Hospital.

We’re happy to report that, despite 2A’s being pretty screwy in general, we have managed to cure some of his compulsion towards excessive detail. One of the more interesting side effects of the treatment process however has been that 2A has now taken a greater interest in bars ~ anybody this anal was in need of a few drinks anyway! http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/biggrin.gif ~ and he now writes Bar Reports at a different site. Here is an example:

Dew Drop Inn
Akutak, Alaska

I arrived at the bar at exactly 5:1 – er, around 5 p.m. There was frozen vomit in the parking lot that I almost stepped in. The bar was by definition a sports bar because it had more than one TV. The bar also featured 2 pool tables, 1 pinball machine, and a juke box. TVs notwithstanding, this place had sort of a hybrid cocktail lounge/tavern atmosphere. I approached the bar through the haze of cigarette smoke (predominantly Marlboro) and ordered from a choice of Budweiser, Bud Light or Miller Genuine Draft. I ordered a Bud and ate some of the pretzels out on the bar. Some clown couldn't handle his beer and had to be 86ed. After 3 beers I left.

In any event, we feel that this patient is now once again reasonably competent to resume submitting Trip Reports and as such have released Seat 2A from our care.

His next trip will be something called a Mileage Run. It begins January 15th and will feature a minimum of 5 and a maximum of 8 segments in First Class. It will be along the following routing:

FAI-ANC-SEA-SFO-IAD-MCO-IAD-SFO-SEA-SFO-IAD-MCO-ORD-SEA-ANC-FAI

Flying for the sole purpose of accruing airline miles makes no sense to the staff at the hospital though they are nonetheless amazed at 2A’s ability to both locate and take full advantage of ridiculously inexpensive airfares! Even so, it is hoped that someday, some form of therapy may cure 2A of this need. He really needs to spend that money on beer.

Stay tuned…

Dr. LaPhonso S. Pinchuck
Attending Physician


[This message has been edited by Seat 2A (edited 01-13-2002).]

ralfkrippner
Jan 14, 02, 9:55 am
VERY GOOD! It took me almost a third into your trip report to switch from amazement over this detailed trip report into the first laughs... Some of my collegues came into my bureau as they heard me laughing...

Good luck for your next trips! Have fun!

US1@ORF
Jan 14, 02, 1:53 pm
Seat 2A - You are a riot. I just love your style and dry humor. I find your stories incredibly theraputic. I have at times thought I should be self-registered at mental health facility due to the excessive stress in my life. But like many others, just eat a few more slices of pound cake, or smoke another pack, drink another six pack, or whatever coping mechanism and move on.

Take care and glad you have been released...

ROFLMAO...James

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US-CP; UA PE; Hilton Gold VIP; Crowne Plaza Gold

magic111
Jan 14, 02, 2:24 pm
Great report - of course I like the reports that agree with my concept of how important details are.
I for one like when TRs express feelings and are you sure that you do not do the Sleep Train™ radio commercials in the San Francisco Bay Area http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/biggrin.gif
btw I knew the report was satire from the moment in the 3rd paragraph when you stated <font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">I was so excited to be going on this trip that I didn’t actually fall asleep until 1:06am.</font> Everyone already knows that they say: "You go to sleep wehn you are tired and you don't go to sleep when you are not tired." Everyone knows excitement has nothing to do with it whatsoever. http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/wink.gif



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