DiningBuzz! - Your mother's worst meals

I feel like we've chatted about this before, but I can't find the thread, so I'm starting again. If there is another thread please suggest merging.

One day over lunch at work we starting talking about our mothers' worst meals. It seems that everyone had one. Something in Mom's regular rotation that veryone hated but yet it kept reappearing.

Mine was something called Russian Fluff, which was neither, and to this day no one can explain the name. It consisted of layers of ground beef, peas, rice and likely tomato soup (the recipe is lost to the mists of time.) The entire thing was dry and tasteless (and cetainly NOT fluffy!).

The winner from our dicussion was Spam Chop Suey.

Anybody else have [un]fond memories of childhood meals?

Pork chops. She would cook them for what seemed like 100 hours. My Shoe soles were more tender

My mom was infamous for her garlic bread. If it weren't for Italian restaurants I would probably still think garlic bread was supposed to be charred black.

Of course the worst meal ever was when she tried to make biscuits, but the oven in our new house was broken so she tried to use the convection oven feature of the microwave. The biscuits looked absolutely perfect - but hard as rocks doesn't begin to describe them. We soaked one in water overnight - still felt like a hockey puck the next morning.

my mother grew up before the depression and before decent refrigeration. she should get the cast iron skillet award. every friday salmon croquets. once a week, something like flank steak (make certain the pink is all gone). on sunday, she'd get up at 3am so the roast would be done by 3pm. corn on the cob got 30 min..... in the pressure cooker!!! yes, the pork chops were unbelievable. had to kill those trichinosis things, then a can of campbells cream of mushroom soup on top.. the only thing she did not kill was frozen peas. she followed the instructions on the box, which was to dump them into boiling water for a couple minutes. had the same salad every night for 18 years(i left) iceberg lettuce and a dressing of hellman's mano cut with milk. home canned string beans were first grown to full maturity before picking. the army bought up the whole supply to spin them for cable.

Pork chops. Early on I called them pork jerky.

You could stand your glass on them without it falling over.

my mother grew up before the depression and before decent refrigeration. she should get the cast iron skillet award. every friday salmon croquets. once a week, something like flank steak (make certain the pink is all gone). on sunday, she'd get up at 3am so the roast would be done by 3pm. corn on the cob got 30 min..... in the pressure cooker!!! yes, the pork chops were unbelievable. had to kill those trichinosis things, then a can of campbells cream of mushroom soup on top.. the only thing she did not kill was frozen peas. she followed the instructions on the box, which was to dump them into boiling water for a couple minutes. had the same salad every night for 18 years(i left) iceberg lettuce and a dressing of hellman's mano cut with milk. home canned string beans were first grown to full maturity before picking. the army bought up the whole supply to spin them for cable.
Sounds much like how my grandmother would cook. If we had a small turkey for Thanksgiving (only 7 of us), and we were eating at 3 PM, she'd have the turkey in the oven well before 7 AM. :)

Brisket. Cooked to the point it was gooey, yet dry, with carrots and celery cooked so far they tasted more of carbon than anything.. I never understood why people like it until I had it done as a smoked meat. Now I smoke a brisket twice a year for family dinners. Little mix of Jewish and Southern cookin'.

Oddly enough ;) her two best dishes were chili and french onion soup. Imagine that. She overcooked everything but anything that took a long time to make she'd do better than a professional chef.

Without a doubt...beef liver. Then again, a four-star Michelin chef could make it and I'd think the same thing. :rolleyes:

Best regards,

William R. Sanders
Social Media Specialist
Starwood Hotels & Resorts Worldwide

spgchampion@starwoodhotels.com

Too many too count...

But one thing she made, EVERY week, was these things she called "pierogies", which were cheese egg and flour dumplings, boiled in water. We ate them just like that. Just unsalted, unflavored, unsauced little masses of crap.

I have forgiven, but I will not forget.

Incidentally, she's turned into a decent cook these days. Figures. :mad:

Too many too count...

But one thing she made, EVERY week, was these things she called "pierogies", which were cheese egg and flour dumplings, boiled in water. We ate them just like that. Just unsalted, unflavored, unsauced little masses of crap.

I have forgiven, but I will not forget.

Incidentally, she's turned into a decent cook these days. Figures. :mad:

Pierogies, cooked properly, and served properly, are delicious! I usually sauté onions in lots of butter while the pierogies are boiling, and then toss the pierogies into that mixture to fry.

Pierogies, cooked properly, and served properly, are delicious! I usually sauté onions in lots of butter while the pierogies are boiling, and then toss the pierogies into that mixture to fry.

Doesn't sound like notsosmart's mom went to all that much trouble to make them edible. ;)

Doesn't sound like notsosmart's mom went to all that much trouble to make them edible. ;)

:) This is true. I'm simply suggesting that they not be deemed horrible due to improper cooking. :)

My Mom would our Paul Newman's Italian salad dressing over boneless and skinless chicken breasts and bake. Healthy, to be sure, but completely devoid of any flavor.

In general I loved - and still do when I visit - my mom's cooking. But there was this one soup she'd make that was a combination of every imaginable vegetable out there that ended up tasting like vinegar. It was repulsive, but the rule was you don't eat the soup, you don't get the main course or desert either. So I ate the damn thing. Luckily it only made the rotation once or twice a year but even 20-25 years later I can still taste that awful vinegary broth. Shudder.

Tongue. 'nuff said.

Like others here, my mom over the years became a more than decent cook. But back then women married young, before they had the chance to learn. My father claimed that he taught my mother how to cook--interesting, since his mother was no culinary genius. Don't know where tongue came into the equation, though.

In general I loved - and still do when I visit - my mom's cooking. But there was this one soup she'd make that was a combination of every imaginable vegetable out there that ended up tasting like vinegar. It was repulsive, but the rule was you don't eat the soup, you don't get the main course or desert either. So I ate the damn thing. Luckily it only made the rotation once or twice a year but even 20-25 years later I can still taste that awful vinegary broth. Shudder.

Sounds like soup my MIL made for us once. It included lots of veggies, and was horrible.

every friday salmon croquets.

How could I have forgotten. Salmon loaf, made with that canned pink "salmon". I can still taste it.

In general I loved - and still do when I visit - my mom's cooking.

I also loved my mom's cooking, but find it funny that even otherwise great cooks seem to all have one disaster that they keep repeating.

How could I have forgotten. Salmon loaf, made with that canned pink "salmon". I can still taste it.



I also loved my mom's cooking, but find it funny that even otherwise great cooks seem to all have one disaster that they keep repeating.

OMG, my mother also used that awful canned sockeye salmon. She made her "famous " salmon croquettes served with ketchup and canned corn. The other horrible dish she made was her completely indigestible meat loaf. I get heartburn just thinking about it.

I genuinely can't think of a disaster dish my mother would make - sure, there were things I didn't like, but the rest of the family did, but nothing she was notorious for.

I am envious of how good a cook my mother is, completely self-taught she can turn out amazing cuisine from a whole host of countries, usually without any recipe!

The one thing I couldn't stand her cooking tho was ham - the smell of it boiling was just vile, I did have to leave the house on days she did that (like Boxing Day!)

Well, mom is now 84 while I am 55 and have not lived at
home for many many years.

I have no memories of bad meals... only good meals and
a concern that I was getting good nutrition.

Sure, there were some items I did not like... but looking back
now I appreciate the concern over the nutritional value of meals.

Pierogies, cooked properly, and served properly, are delicious! I usually sauté onions in lots of butter while the pierogies are boiling, and then toss the pierogies into that mixture to fry.

You're talking to a Polish guy. If there is anything I know, it's pierogis. ;)

She just called them that, because in Poland, that's the catch-all for all dumplings.

Mother : Boiled beef liver. Literally boiled in water, with nothing else. Then forced us to drink the water and eat the liver. Claiming it's good for our health.

MIL : Steak. That generation obviously believed that beef must be thoroughly cooked. The steak is pan fried ahead of time, then steamed, then microwave it right before dinner time.

Horror.

Well, mom is now 84 while I am 55 and have not lived at
home for many many years.

I have no memories of bad meals... only good meals and
a concern that I was getting good nutrition.

Sure, there were some items I did not like... but looking back
now I appreciate the concern over the nutritional value of meals.

So send her a card. The OP didn't ask for a Hallmark answer... :p

;)

I can't think of any repeat disaster. One or tow things that were bad but it was generally a case of this is awful let's not have it again. Of course there was stuff not everyone liked but nothing that was repeatedly inedible

Fried eggs. My mother used to fry them so long that I just scraped a bit of what was still edible off the top and then you could use the base as a space shuttle heat shield.

So send her a card. The OP didn't ask for a Hallmark answer... :p

;)

Ok, so you don't like your mother's cooking... nothing I can do about that. :D

Mother : Boiled beef liver. Literally boiled in water, with nothing else. Then forced us to drink the water and eat the liver. Claiming it's good for our health.

[snip]

That is beyond bad. Sympathy to you.

In general I loved - and still do when I visit - my mom's cooking. But there was this one soup she'd make that was a combination of every imaginable vegetable out there that ended up tasting like vinegar. It was repulsive, but the rule was you don't eat the soup, you don't get the main course or desert either. So I ate the damn thing. Luckily it only made the rotation once or twice a year but even 20-25 years later I can still taste that awful vinegary broth. Shudder.

Well, I like foods that have vinegar in them, and I also like vegetables, and I like soup, so if you recall the recipe or thereabouts, would appreciate it if you would post it. :D

I recall when I was little my parents coming in late one night and fixing brains and scrambled eggs. So little I didn't think of refusing to eat it. I remember it was pretty good, the only time I've tasted brains in my life, and would be too squeamish now.

All those moms fixing dinner every single night using such conveniences as a can of mushroom soup for gravy... meat, a starch and a canned vegetable or frozen peas. Still, it was better overall than most families have today, using pizza and fast food takeout too often.

...If there is another thread please suggest merging.

Maybe you're thinking of the opposite thread?

http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/diningbuzz/702305-nobody-can-cook-like-mother-thread.html

Fried eggs. My mother used to fry them so long that I just scraped a bit of what was still edible off the top and then you could use the base as a space shuttle heat shield.

Are you bragging about my cooking again?

While I can't compete with milepig's mother's salmon loaf, my mother's casserole comes pretty close. It was made up of canned tuna fish, canned peas including the liquid, potato chips and cream of mushroom soup. It was totally disgusting. I could gag just thinking about it.

Bobette

My mother was an extraordinarily good cook, and I didn't
think that I'd be able to contribute to this thread, until
I remembered what she did with Smithfield ham, which
was to bake it as though it were an ordinary ham, then
serve it in thick slices. She did that only a couple times
before giving up. Otherwise, what she made was either
true to the original recipe (even if one didn't like it, as
with brussels sprouts) or very good or both.

Without a doubt...beef liver.

Ditto...it put me off liver for life.

Another was her asparagus soup....thank God she never served both courses at the same dinner.

I should add she was a pretty good cook apart from those two.

I told my mom about this thread. She got a grin on her face and said "hockey pucks!":p

My mom is an incredibly good cook (Southern US foods), even in her eighties today when I come home for the holidays. I can name so many dishes (the best, believe it or not, a squash casserole) that I've never been able to replicate and I like to think I know something about cooking.

There still is one thing, though ... the gravy that she makes at holidays. Pale gray, thick, and (yuck) full of hard-boiled egg slices. I've never gotten it, but because everything else is spectacular, I've never said anything.

I saw a few negative comments about salmon croquettes -- I don't know what my mom did with those, but my mouth is watering thinking about those again.

My Mother tries and tries and tries to make lamb but she just can't do it. She cooks it with rosemary and carrots in the oven and she has a terrible fear of overcooking it, so she always serves it horribly undercooked. We're talking raw...and cold. She served it to my sister-in-law's parents two years ago and apparently they're still talking about how bad it is :D

Thankfully, she makes a great pumpkin pie and she also made me, so she's forgiven

Without a doubt...beef liver.

+nod+ I must say my mom was generally a good cook. Her beef stroganoff is a real treat.

But man, oh man, she cooked that liver to +death+. At least once a month. Even my dad, the Col. who served in exciting places, could stomach anything, and taught me to eat interesting thing like kimchi (the real deal, not that lame pasteurized stuff) straight up, would push it around his plate and give us PB&Js on the sly. The onions couldn't begin to save it. I still can't go there.

My mom also went through strange, experimental cooking phases. The Japanese period was generally good, but I may suggest that feeding your midwestern kids under the age of 12 severely overcooked baby octopus in fish sauce is a complete non-starter...

You're talking to a Polish guy. If there is anything I know, it's pierogis. ;)

She just called them that, because in Poland, that's the catch-all for all dumplings.
:) Sounds like your mother didn't know how to cook them. :)

Other wise a grand and creative cook, my mother, capable of turning out fine chef quality scrambled eggs, soft and creamy, could not "fry" and egg without turning it into a "crispy critter". Nor, breakfasting a large household, 5 of us plus Dad (when he hadn't left early for rounds or surgery), did she do well with bacon which often suffered the same fate as the fried eggs, charred to a level capable of producing more carcinogens than a un-remedied chemical dump site.

I won't blame her culinary ability for the "Tuna Noodle Casserole", just the times, although the addition of "canned" English Peas (buckshot, not birdshot) lowered the dish to less than subsistence quality, leaving me to parse the dish for the bits of pimento to savor. When you're reduced to enjoying bottled pimento, you're reduced....

But then, a Gulf Coaster reared on deviled crab and crab cakes, she could work wonders with canned salmon, even the cheap pink kind, and even today, I'll occasionally resort to her recipe for salmon patties, deja vu. ....And then there was her coffee, a dark roast Gulf Coast brand, "percolated", served in bowl-like cups mixed with hot "whole" milk (She kept the cream for herself.) and a dollop of cane syrup. At about 10, we came of age to be allowed to enjoy it in the morning.

Hands down it was cauliflower cheese. This was cauliflower done in a pressure cooker untiil it was a mush (she is now 78 and still does not know the meaning of al dente). This mush was then covered with a cheese sauce that was thcik and pasty because of the flour added.

More an item than a meal, but I'd be remiss if I didn't mention canned asparagus. Really, why would anyone think that canning something already slimy to begin with would be a good idea!!

My mom's a great Chinese cook, but when I was a kid, she couldn't cook anything else. My sister and I were crazy over KFC coleslaw as kids. So my mom figured she'd whip up a batch one day. She cut up some cabbage, poured in milk, added some sugar, and voila!

My sister and I still get a chuckle over that!

Custard. My mother's custard is a grey, gelatinous mess that tastes worse than it looks - it's the sort of thing I imagine that the authorities would serve in prisons to deter people from committing crimes upon their release in case they were sent back and had to eat it again.

In her younger days she used to make a tangy citrus dessert that was actually delicious, but we called it "lemon surprise" because it never, ever came out the same way twice. I must ask her to do that again next time I visit.

We would have corncakes and beans. The corn cakes were like pancakes made from cornmeal. Over 2-3 corncakes we poured pork'n beans from the can (heated). A garnish of diced onions and voila!.. A complete protein (I think)...

My mom was a good cook; she didn't go for anything fancy but she produced healthy, tasty, thrifty meals nearly every night of the week. Lots of casseroles so we could have leftovers the next day, and her idea of salad was a wedge of iceberg with bottled dressing, but by and large quite good. At one point she dabbled in Chinese cuisine and made credible spring rolls and stir fries. And for holidays she would produce a full turkey with all the trimmings for a dozen people. I learned a lot and still use many of her recipes today.

Except... :( for bean-sprout lasagna. :( :( I have a feeling it came from a Weight Watcher's cookbook/magazine, during a phase of low-fat, super-healthy meals. It used a large quantity of raw fresh bean sprouts in place of lasagna pasta sheets, and had (thin) tomato sauce, probably some low-fat cheese or cheese-substitute, and maybe a small amount of ground beef. In any case, in the baking process, the bean sprouts cooked down to a water, slimy mess was so tasteless that it actually sucked the taste out of the other ingredients as well. I believe she made it a three or four times before accepting that it was a loser.

Lima beans. Yuck. I think they were boiled until they were somewhat soft. They were disgusting. We added ketchup to give it a little flavor. Oh, and we drank powdered milk because it was cheaper than regular milk. Also very disgusting.

I think it was my mother's one and only attempt at cooking a curry, a Steak Vindaloo. It was many many years ago before we started eating at Indian Restaurants and a spicy dish for us would have been a roast dinner with a good dollop of English Mustard. She left the Steak simmering away for about 2 hours, but still the steak was tough and extremely hot

Pierogies, cooked properly, and served properly, are delicious! I usually sauté onions in lots of butter while the pierogies are boiling, and then toss the pierogies into that mixture to fry.
I see pierogies a lot in the grocery stores around here. Are they ever eaten with gravy or any other kind of sauce, or just butter?

I see pierogies a lot in the grocery stores around here. Are they ever eaten with gravy or any other kind of sauce, or just butter?

I've only eaten them with butter, but then again, why bother with gravy? :)

A blast from the past...

I must have been 5, so set the date as late 1944 or early '45, Dad overseas. Some generous friend gave my mother a case of canned mackerel, back then a grocery store standard. The only edible creation therefrom (after several failures) was mashed with chopped onions and spread on Saltine crackers (which done with sardines helped me survive college).

Don't try it, but if in dire straits and educed to canned mackerel, it's better that way than in casseroles, patties or "loaf'.

....But then, even today, I'll go out of my way to find salt mackerel, to my breakfast palate having better flavor and appeal than kippers. It's been 50 years since they were a breakfast menu standard at San Antonio's Menger Hotel, served with boiled potatoes, truly the "Breakfast of Champions". Then there's smoked mullet, a specialty of the Florida Panhandle Coast, hard to find today, and not everyone's cup of tea.

A blast from the past...

I must have been 5, so set the date as late 1944 or early '45, Dad overseas. Some generous friend gave my mother a case of canned mackerel, back then a grocery store standard. The only edible creation therefrom (after several failures) was mashed with chopped onions and spread on Saltine crackers (which done with sardines helped me survive college).

Don't try it, but if in dire straits and educed to canned mackerel, it's better that way than in casseroles, patties or "loaf'.

....But then, even today, I'll go out of my way to find salt mackerel, to my breakfast palate having better flavor and appeal than kippers. It's been 50 years since they were a breakfast menu standard at San Antonio's Menger Hotel, served with boiled potatoes, truly the "Breakfast of Champions". Then there's smoked mullet, a specialty of the Florida Panhandle Coast, hard to find today, and not everyone's cup of tea.

I've had to deal with canned mackerel precisely once - I was on a sailing course, and the person who stocked the boat with 'supplies' was having a laugh. NOTHING went together! As I proved pretty useless at ropes, sails etc. my jobs were a) monioting the radar and depth guage (which others found baffling!), b) driving with the engine on (simples!) and c) all the cooking (that, and I suspect being a girl also may have played a part!) The only thing I could come up with to use the mackerel was a version of kedgeree, having both rice and eggs, as well as a tin of curry powder. I don't eat fish, but at the rate it vanished, and second helpings having been taken, I think it went down well!

Tuna fish casserole with big chunks of onions and crumbled up crackers on the top. That stuff was hideous and not even edible. I ate the bread and salad only the nights that crap was for dinner. The salmon patties prepared with canned salmon with bones were equally disgusting, no amount of mayo or catsup could help or disguise that flavor. I would not feed any of that nasty tasting stuff to my cats. Other than those two dishes she was an amazing cook, I think those were her easy to cook and cheap dishes. Fortunately they didn't make an appearance very often.

My Mom made some kind of soup with white beans that was hideous. Luckily it only made the rotation a few times per year but I can still imagine that horrible taste. Thankfully most of her other dishes were much, much better!

Wow. Most of them. She made just a couple of things well. Chicken soup and mac n cheese. Everything else was dog food. Even she'll admit that. She does not like to cook.

Pork and beef roasts. I swear I hated them so much my mother stopped cooking them. The roasts were always far too lean and cooked to a medium-well, at least.

All was forgiven when mom made cupcakes, spaghetti with Italian sweet sausage, or shrimp stir fried with pineapples and veg.

I have no idea what it was, except that it was cooked in a crock pot and my brother and I called it "zoo meat."

Without a doubt...beef liver. Then again, a four-star Michelin chef could make it and I'd think the same thing. :rolleyes:

Best regards,

William R. Sanders
Social Media Specialist
Starwood Hotels & Resorts Worldwide

spgchampion@starwoodhotels.com

I second that motion. Beef liver is one thing I hated growing up.

I second that motion. Beef liver is one thing I hated growing up.

Another dish in which "prep" and cooking time/temp can make a world of difference. I learned from my Dad (not my Mom) to cut calves' (or lamb) liver in strips, let in spend a while in a marinade of olive oil, lemon juice, garlic, cominos, salt and pepper, skewer it, then sear in very briefly to rare or medium rare over as hot a fire as possible. Works well for hearts too, although they, tougher, profit from a longer period in the marinade (overnight's not too long).

Quick cooking seems to prevent the breakdown of some of the complex organic compounds (with bad smell and taste) present in organ meats. With kidneys, it's tough to mask or overcome that ever-present hint of what went on within them....

I second that motion. Beef liver is one thing I hated growing up.

I learned a valuable lesson when I was about 9 or 10. When I was younger we rarely went out to restaurants and the only beef we usually had was hamburger (for the very cheap meal of Hamburger Helper). We had steak once on special occasions. I went to live with a new family at age 9 and we went to a local buffet restaurant (anyone else remember King's Table?). They had servings of what I thought was steak. I found the biggest one I could find and brought it back to the table. My new parents snickered as I anxiously cut it up into bit-size pieces. Imagine my surprise it wasn't steak at all but liver. As a lesson, my parents made me eat the entire thing. Yuck. To this day, I won't eat liver.

When I was kid I didn't like meatloaf really and my Mom would make it with these hugeee chunks of onion in it and HATED it! I can laugh about it now and don't mind onions but back then? It was my worst nightmare...lol

My mom was an old fashioned southern cook, which meant that my brother & sister & I were usually treated very well at the table. Unlike many who've posted here, I grew up loving liver & onions. She also cooked lots of cornbread and greens - kale, collard, turnip greens with ham hocks. She raised us eating things like sweet pickle relish on black-eyed peas and vinegar on spinach, both of which my wife finds weird. She also would save leftovers, no matter how small a portion, and continue to bring them out at every meal until somebody finished them.

However, we lived in Germany for 4 years while I was in elementary school, and during that period she tried to learn to cook the local cuisine - with disastrous results. I remember inedible (shoe leather tough) sourbraten with red cabbage, and some horrendous attempts at making goulash. I recall that when Dad took us to eat in a local restaurant weekly, my sister and I always ordered Italian.

Hmmm...I do not remember any horrible food growing up (dad did 90% of the cooking) except for onion flavored meat loaf (still hated by me at age 50) but a few disasters that happened (we still laugh about it 30+ years later) were with deserts, loaf pan cakes in particular.

Almost always, we would cut a piece of a loaf pan cake and batter would flow like lava from the still uncooked interior..HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I do not understand the hatred of canned Salmon (and Salmon Croquettes)...I have always (and still do) love them, though these days I remove every bone I can find and use quality bread crumbs and fresh eggs and eat them hot and fresh...oh well, food like wine is pretty subjective...

Cheers,

Mother : Boiled beef liver. Literally boiled in water, with nothing else. Then forced us to drink the water and eat the liver. Claiming it's good for our health.

MIL : Steak. That generation obviously believed that beef must be thoroughly cooked. The steak is pan fried ahead of time, then steamed, then microwave it right before dinner time.

Horror.

Jesus H. Christ! That is horror.

With all the predominantly American stories here, I get the impression that there is or was indeed a serious lack of cooking skills in the US.

I grew up in Germany and my mother, grandmothers and aunts were all excellent cooks. Granted all of them had to take cooking classes before marriage, as is custom in "good" families. But even when I was invited to a friend's house I never had the impression they didn't know what they were doing and more than once enjoyed an excellent meal.

I also had a lot of meals in Italian, Swiss and French households. Nothing negative to report.

OTOH, the mother of an American ex-GF of mine was only a ho-hum cook and her rice really was hated by everyone. I thought about teaching her (as an 18 yo boy) how to cook good rice but refrained because I didn't want to insult her.

Now, I have many American friends who are total foodies and good cooks. So I think the times are achanging.

Till

My mom was an old fashioned southern cook, which meant that my brother & sister & I were usually treated very well at the table. Unlike many who've posted here, I grew up loving liver & onions. She also cooked lots of cornbread and greens - kale, collard, turnip greens with ham hocks. She raised us eating things like sweet pickle relish on black-eyed peas and vinegar on spinach, both of which my wife finds weird. She also would save leftovers, no matter how small a portion, and continue to bring them out at every meal until somebody finished them.

However, we lived in Germany for 4 years while I was in elementary school, and during that period she tried to learn to cook the local cuisine - with disastrous results. I remember inedible (shoe leather tough) sourbraten with red cabbage, and some horrendous attempts at making goulash. I recall that when Dad took us to eat in a local restaurant weekly, my sister and I always ordered Italian.
You just brought back a memory of my Mom's collard greens. There was so much vinegar in those things, she could clean the stove with the excess liquid. Ugh!!!
One day I recall smelling something cooking in the kitchen. I go in, take the lid off the kettle, and inside was a hogs head. I dropped the lid on the floor and went running out of there!

Worse meal was mother's version of Chinese. La Choy brand chop suey with some broiled-to-death chicken. The chop suey came in two cans, one for vegetables (in some sort of glop) and another for the crispy (and extremely oily) noodles. I actually really liked this as a kid but my first taste of "real" Chinese food was eye-opening to say the least. Kinda like the difference between Taco Bell and Mexican food.

Quiche... Its beyond moist and downright unpleasant to eat.

Worse meal was mother's version of Chinese. La Choy brand chop suey with some broiled-to-death chicken. The chop suey came in two cans, one for vegetables (in some sort of glop) and another for the crispy (and extremely oily) noodles. I actually really liked this as a kid but my first taste of "real" Chinese food was eye-opening to say the least. Kinda like the difference between Taco Bell and Mexican food.

This caused me to recall my distant childhood, when tamales were something that came out of a can, and pizza was a box from Chef Boyardee containing a mix for crust (just add water), a can of sauce, and a packet of grated parmesan - and we loved it.

I see pierogies a lot in the grocery stores around here. Are they ever eaten with gravy or any other kind of sauce, or just butter?

Sauerkraut. Sour cream. Sauteed onions.

This caused me to recall my distant childhood, when tamales were something that came out of a can, and pizza was a box from Chef Boyardee containing a mix for crust (just add water), a can of sauce, and a packet of grated parmesan - and we loved it.

Even in the 50s, there was an adequate "Tortilleria" a few blocks away, providing scratch made tamales along with tortillas de mais (corn) and de harina (flour, back then mostly Christmas & holiday food), so we were spared canned tamales, the most ghastly examples of which were from Hormel and Austex, wrapped in paper instead of corn shucks, put up in vaguely chili gravy.

I'll admit that good pizza came late, first as an appetizer at Houston's old Valian's near S. Main & OST in the 50s, and not really frequently encountered before my first visits to italy and the Winter 0f '62-'63 in the Brooklyn Navy Yard.

This caused me to recall my distant childhood, when tamales were something that came out of a can, and pizza was a box from Chef Boyardee containing a mix for crust (just add water), a can of sauce, and a packet of grated parmesan - and we loved it.

Wasn't there also spaghetti dinner in a box - pasta, a can of sauce, and a little packet of grated "cheese"??

Wasn't there also spaghetti dinner in a box - pasta, a can of sauce, and a little packet of grated "cheese"??

Yes, and let's not forget Chef Boyardee canned ravioli. Or, maybe I should, but just can't. :eek:

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My Mother tries and tries and tries to make lamb but she just can't do it. She cooks it with rosemary and carrots in the oven and she has a terrible fear of overcooking it, so she always serves it horribly undercooked. We're talking raw...and cold.

She made it last night for a Family Dinner. Came out blood red so she finished it up in the microwave :eek:

Really, really bad - the fried pork chops ( 1/4" thick and fried for at least a half hour) served with a side of spaghetti - boiled for 25 minutes and then a can of Hunts poured over top. :(. She thought it was an integration of Southern heritage and international cuisine.

My Mother grew up with a housekeeper (think The Help) and then marries at 19- so not only did she not know how to cook, she didn't particularly want to learn.

As my paternal Grandmother was an excellent, "from scratch" cook, Dad definitely had some adjusting to do. I always thought "love definitely IS blind" ...until I realized Mom was rather gorgeous with buckets of southern charm. So unlike most families of the day, we ate out - A LOT...and Dad never seemed to mind.

...
I always thought "love definitely IS blind" ...

Maybe love is just "bland.":)

Maybe love is just "bland.":)
:D x 2

I do remember my mom boiling pork chops and then broiling them (I think it had to do with the fear of eating raw pork:eek:, and our 'bow' to italian food was the Chef Boy R Dee spaghetti in a box (loved the meat sauce), and while (at the time) I never considered these to be 'worst meals', looking back now I couldn't imagine eating them again.
Also at every dinner meal we would have a vegetable and potatoes -- yes, even with pasta. pizza or or take out chow main, and milk-- always glasses of milk with every meal.

"succotash": canned lima beans, canned creamed corn, dried-up breakfast sausage links.

Sigh. How we children of children of the Depression suffered through an odd culinary time in America.

My mom is a very good cook when it comes to old country recipes. Her being from Germany makes me very lucky.

That being said she thinks her skills with German food translates somehow to Southeastern US fare.

For example, she will chop up a pork butt, throw it in the crock pot with BBQ sauce and let it simmer for several hours and claim it is SC BBQ. No, it's not. It's some type of mushy pork that doesn't even resemble BBQ.

She also thinks she can cook fried chicken. She can't.

She buys the cheapest steaks possible, marinates them in Teriyaki overnight and cooks them on the grill until they are burnt. She insists that is they way steak should be eaten.

I just asked Mrs. Gamecock about her mom, who is a terrible cook, for something that was really bad. The DW laughed and said "fried spinach patties." Ketchup was added to taste.

"succotash": canned lima beans, canned creamed corn, dried-up breakfast sausage links.

Sigh. How we children of children of the Depression suffered through an odd culinary time in America.

Frozen food was still an innovation, thanks to Clarence Birdseye, and our elders grew up thinking canned vegetables tasted just fine. ;)

This thread brings back fond kitchen memories of my own mother, a pretty good cook overall with some sense of adventure. Although I too grew up thinking all Chinese food came in a La Choy can, and ate my share of Chef Boyardee canned ravioli, she did make a pretty good lasagne that impressed dinner guests and even home-made pizza, both of which counted as "ethnic" food in my part of the world in the 50s and a step above the casseroles of the day (http://www.deseretnews.com/article/705294323/The-Casserole-Chronicles-Readers-tell-us-of-their-worst-childhood-dinners.html?pg=all) (corn flake toppings and all). :D

Children of the depression? Sometimes it really showed... I remember a rare occasion on a trip when we bought french fries to go and at the counter she picked up the wrong shaker and sprinkled sugar on them instead of salt. Back in the car, after we found out she continued to eat her share and urged us to do the same, insisting they tasted just fine if you brushed the sugar off. :p

My favorite? The time she cooked her traditional well-done rump roast for Sunday dinner and the meat thermometer broke when she inserted it. She called a drug store for advice about mercury and the pharmacist told her she shouldn't serve the roast to her family.

That wasn't good enough. She had to call another drug store for a second opinion. :p Fortunately the second druggist concurred and I still remember the excitement of being eight and eating that night in a real restaurant - most regular folks didn't out that much in those days - thanks to that broken meat thermometer.

Thanks for the memories. ^ :)

Mother : Boiled beef liver. Literally boiled in water, with nothing else. Then forced us to drink the water and eat the liver. Claiming it's good for our health.



Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a winner! :eek:

Goat's head. Honest to God the whole head of a goat right there on the table roasted.........ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had an Uncle who loved it so my mother made it just for him one time.
I left the room very quickly......

Worst: Her "pot roast". I understand that it's a comfort food for many families but I never, ever got the point of pot roast. I want my carrots to taste like carrots, my potatoes to taste like potatoes and my meat not to absolutely fall apart before I can get it to my mouth.

Best: Her invention "shepherd's pie burgers". She'd cut hamburger with a can of tomato paste, fry the burgers till cooked. Cover each burger with a patty of stiff mashed potatoes and then (while still in the pan) throw a good large but thin slice of cheddar cheese over them. There was just something about the tomato paste that made them amazing, it caramelized and changed the flavor completely.

Goat's head. Honest to God the whole head of a goat right there on the table roasted.........ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had an Uncle who loved it so my mother made it just for him one time.
I left the room very quickly......

I hope she left the eyes in so it would "see you through the week".

Best: Her invention "shepherd's pie burgers". She'd cut hamburger with a can of tomato paste, fry the burgers till cooked. Cover each burger with a patty of stiff mashed potatoes and then (while still in the pan) throw a good large but thin slice of cheddar cheese over them. There was just something about the tomato paste that made them amazing, it caramelized and changed the flavor completely.

That sound absolutely amazing ^

My all-American mom excelled at cooking complex and decidedly non-standard fare (for middle America at least) but failed when it came to simple things. Jell-o stumped her, honestly. But a batch of from-scratch grape-leaf sarma - an all-day affair that took over the entire kitchen and dining table - was a triumphant winner whenever she made it.

Her worst concoction was swiss steak. What we ended up with was a usually-burnt piece of stringy, dry meat which had definitely not been tenderized with a tomato-y sauce that had many bits of curled-up tomato skin in it and green peppers that had been cooked so long to the point of bitterness, plopped on top of mashed potatoes made from a box with too much liquid so they were on the soupy side. (She refused to make mashed potatoes from real potatoes, ever, who knows why.)

Just thinking about that meat makes me want to go floss my teeth right now.

I see pierogies a lot in the grocery stores around here. Are they ever eaten with gravy or any other kind of sauce, or just butter?

In my opinion, they are best with sour cream.

They work well with a tomato based pasta sauce. I have no shame mixing Polish & Italian!

They also work with English baked beans or ketchup!

Goat's head. Honest to God the whole head of a goat right there on the table roasted.........ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had an Uncle who loved it so my mother made it just for him one time.
I left the room very quickly......

How about a dozen lamb heads staring at you from the kitchen counter?! The joys of a Greek Easter.

In my opinion, they are best with sour cream.

I'd agree.

My Polish partner makes them (some varieties boiled, some shallow fried in butter w/chopped onion or bacon bits) and a good quality creme fraiche really tops them off!

Adey

Quiche was mentioned earlier. My mom experimented with that once and put too much dried mustard in it. We called it Egg Pie. It was one of the few things that we did not have to eat. And it became one of those long-running family jokes.

Liver was never a favorite. My brother hid the package once under the sink. After a few years went by of liver revolt by the kids, my dad would grill it outside and serve it with bacon. At last it was ok.

Chef Boyardee ravioli was my go to favorite to take on boy scout camping trips and heat up in the little pot that came with the mess kit.

Beef tongue was always a treat - served with tomato sauce.

My mother never had a bad meal. She could make cardboard taste delicious.
I on the other hand...

Mother did not make many bad meals at all, I can't even remember a standout or anything now. There were some things I ate then that I would not really 'like' now but they weren't bad at all. Always well seasoned and not bland.

Thank you for this thread.

My mother had many worst - and repeating - meals.

1. Wieners in dry corn tortillas. OMG.

Thank you for this thread.

My mother had many worst - and repeating - meals.

1. Wieners in dry corn tortillas. OMG.
Wow I can think of only one way to make it worse, using vienna sausages!

Just remembered another food related "disappointment"; this one rather minor but it still sticks with me.

Mom would often use Green Giant (r) button mushrooms. These came brined (or something like that) in a small jar; rubbery texture and vile taste. Typically used in spaghetti sauce. Hadn't had them for decades until I stayed at a B&B in York and found them served as part of a traditional English breakfast. Memories - not pleasant ones - flooded back.

Just remembered another food related "disappointment"; this one rather minor but it still sticks with me.

Mom would often use Green Giant (r) button mushrooms. These came brined (or something like that) in a small jar; rubbery texture and vile taste. Typically used in spaghetti sauce. Hadn't had them for decades until I stayed at a B&B in York and found them served as part of a traditional English breakfast. Memories - not pleasant ones - flooded back.

:confused: I'd not think canned shrooms where part of a traditional english breakfast! Flat mushroom caps, yes.

:confused: I'd not think canned shrooms where part of a traditional english breakfast! Flat mushroom caps, yes.

Maybe part of the B&B experience. We had them often in our 3 weeks of B&B-ing around England. I don't mind them though.

My stepmother was overall a darn good cook, but she was able to completely ruin two dishes that I normally like a lot. First was beef stroganoff. Leftover roast beef cubed, Aunt Penny's White Sauce, and canned mushrooms. Nothing else. Always served over rice.

The second was lamb curry. Leftover lamb meat cubed, the same white sauce, bell peppers, and loads of supermarket 'curry powder'. Over rice.

My mother was a good cook, but once I was the only "child" (if one can really call a 20-something year old that) in the house, and my father out of the house three days a week thanks to an exercise program (brought on, probably ironically due to a heart attack), the meals got quite grim. She wound up cooking most night mostly for herself, and was often surprised when either I or my father showed up for meals. Most nights when she assumed we would not be around, and those meals would consist of:



Microwave popcorn
Cheese dreams - that is half-pieces of bread covered with a processed cheese slice and half a piece of bacon. I can only commend the bacon. Bacon is everything...


Both served with multiple glasses from a cardboard box of gewurztraminer.

The popcorn was grim, but you have to appreciate the "cheese dreams." I mean, at least it had bacon, which makes anything better.

Kidney. No matter how it was prepared. Liver I could do with enough spice. Kidney, not so much.

Mom: My Mother was generally a good cook - though she did tend to over use Campbell's Golden Mushroom soup. Most things she whipped up were pretty good. Her cheese potato casserole is legendary. However, her "meatloaf" was dreadful. It was made in a casserole dish and had large cubes of soggy bread in it. Fortunately, the recipe has been lost to time but it likely included Golden Mushroom soup. I ate it and didn't realize how bad it was until having other people's meatloaf. Mom used to threaten us with Salmon Wiggle, which her Mother used to serve on Fridays. Canned salmon, sour cream sauce, and peas. She never actually served it to us; thank God.

MIL: My wife's mother is truly a dreadful cook. Nothing edible comes out of her kitchen. She even screws up pancakes, which taste of raw flour and have a dense unappetizing texture. Her fried chicken is simultaneously burnt and raw and the gravy she makes from the grease is indescribable. Spoon that black-flecked mess over her soggy rice and it's impossible to choke down. My wife and her sister describe something called Spaghetti with Cheese as the number one horror of their childhood. It was her version of Mac and Cheese. Think overcooked broken spaghetti strands mixed with milk and shredded cheese. The cheese would congeal rather than melt into a sauce. Enjoy!

P.S. - When I read the "boiled liver" and drink the juice thread to my wife, she gagged. We once had a dog that was very ill. On the advice of a vet, we fed her cubed boiled liver. The smell was repulsive. We discarded the boiling liquid. We wouldn't feed that to our dog.

...P.S. - When I read the "boiled liver" and drink the juice thread to my wife, she gagged. We once had a dog that was very ill. On the advice of a vet, we fed her cubed boiled liver. The smell was repulsive. We discarded the boiling liquid. We wouldn't feed that to our dog.

The sad part is that they would drink it, if you gave it to them. After all, they eat cat poop with no hesitation whatsover. :eek:

I'd not think canned shrooms where part of a traditional english breakfast! Flat mushroom caps, yes. Bit of a staple in B&B and 3 star hotels. It's actually more rare to find proper fried mushrooms - although we usually use button mushrooms. Portobello mushrooms only started appearing about 15 years ago.

My mother had to contend with a husband who liked meat and two veg, and who would complain if she used things like herbs because it would mask the taste of the meat and two daughters who didn't like meat and two veg and all while working. All in all, she didn't do too bad - but her weak spot was the number of times the potatoes were burned. The taste of semi burned (i.e. ones which could still be removed from the bottom of the pan, so could still be served) still haunts me.

Now she has retired, her cooking is a lot more adventurous, but she still burns the potatoes...

Bit of a staple in B&B and 3 star hotels. It's actually more rare to find proper fried mushrooms - although we usually use button mushrooms. Portobello mushrooms only started appearing about 15 years ago.


My father insists on his fried button mushrooms with his full English! It is one of the only things he is capable of cooking himself! I agree, flat musrooms (portobello) have only appeared as part of the breakfast in recent years, button would be traditional (though thankfully I never came across canned, but then I am not a mushroom, or full English fan!)

Mom generally didn't cook unless it involved a can of mushroom soup. Dad was a good cook but would occasionally make something he called wiener soup. Picture a sukiyaki-like broth with just eggs and hot dog sections boiled until they resembled Vienna Sausages in taste and texture. I am probably the least picky person I know, but I won't touch that stuff.