DiningBuzz! - New York Times: One Hundred Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do

http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/10/29/one-hundred-things-restaurant-staffers-should-never-do-part-one/?em

Quite an interesting list, and quite the diverse set of comments as well.

IMHO the guy sounds a bit sanctimonious and full of himself, but many (most?) of the items are pretty decent.

The author does sound pompous, but most of his points I'd agree with fairly easily. Most of his points seem to be common sense.

This list might be appropriate for a higher-class white tablecloth type of place, but if my favorite pho joint was like that, I would stop going there.

17. Do not take an empty plate from one guest while others are still eating the same course. Wait, wait, wait.

+1. I hate this. I feel rushed.

31. Never remove a plate full of food without asking what went wrong. Obviously, something went wrong.

This isn't always true. I'm a really light eater and the portions are often way too large. They should still ask, though.

Number 32 gave me a chuckle:

"32. Never touch a customer. No excuses. Do not do it. Do not brush them, move them, wipe them or dust them."

Just trying to imagine under what circumstance a waiter might find themselves wishing to "dust" a customer!!

Don't get this one

7. Do not announce your name. No jokes, no flirting, no cuteness.

Why not tell them your name? And if you want to flirt with me, please feel free to do so. Seriously, it's OK.

Don't get this one

7. Do not announce your name. No jokes, no flirting, no cuteness.

Why not tell them your name? And if you want to flirt with me, please feel free to do so. Seriously, it's OK.
Yes, that's exactly how I see it.

A truly gifted person in any sort of customer-facing role has the insight to read each customer and interact with them accordingly. Some customers (like me) like to develop a rapport with their waiters where possible - or at least crack little jokes to make life a little more enoyable. Others are quite standoff-ish or reserved which is their right as well.

http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/10/29/one-hundred-things-restaurant-staffers-should-never-do-part-one/?em

Quite an interesting list, and quite the diverse set of comments as well.

IMHO the guy sounds a bit sanctimonious and full of himself, but many (most?) of the items are pretty decent.

Myself, I only have one rule for restraunt staff:

WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER USING THE TOILET!

Don't get this one

7. Do not announce your name. No jokes, no flirting, no cuteness.

Why not tell them your name? And if you want to flirt with me, please feel free to do so. Seriously, it's OK.

I don't go to restaurants to establish relationships with my servers. I don't need to know his/her name. And I don't need any flirtatious behavior.

I agree with 90 of the things 100% of the time and the rest 90% of the time.

Yeah, 45 of the things 100% of the time and the rest 90% of the time.

Yes, that's exactly how I see it.

A truly gifted person in any sort of customer-facing role has the insight to read each customer and interact with them accordingly. Some customers (like me) like to develop a rapport with their waiters where possible - or at least crack little jokes to make life a little more enoyable. Others are quite standoff-ish or reserved which is their right as well.

Agree wholeheartedly as someone who has been on both sides of the table (metaphorically--I wasn't a waiter).

I never understood standoffish people. I'm not an extrovert by any means, but I can't help but thinking that people who are that way are missing out on some of life's joys.

Of course, it depends on the atmosphere. I wouldn't expect tons of personal interaction at a four-star restaurant. Then again, my uncle is practically best friends with the majority of the staff at 21 in New York (where he's one of their super-regular customers)...

Before beginning to read the list, #12 was the first thing that came to mind. +1 - I won't hesitate to has for a new drink if I see a server do this.

As for #2, as someone who eats as a party of one most of the time, I wholeheartedly agree with the first part, but disagree with the part about being asked to sit at the bar. To me it most certainly smacks of being shunted off so that regular tables can be kept open for larger parties. Even with smoking banned, I hate the height of barstools or so-called "high-top" seating - I find it impossible to relax and enjoy my meal.

- Do not divide Top 100 lists into Two Parts :D

I never understood standoffish people. I'm not an extrovert by any means, but I can't help but thinking that people who are that way are missing out on some of life's joys.
Sure, me neither, but that's their right. God gave me one life to live and I'm going to enjoy it as much as I can. I like to have a bit of a laugh and I appreciate a dry and wicked sense of humour, but not everyone does nor should be expected to - which is totally cool. I think a person with a gift for customer service (regardless of profession) can adapt to any situation.

As for #2, as someone who eats as a party of one most of the time, I ... disagree with the part about being asked to sit at the bar.

I completely agree. As a frequent solo diner I also find it annoying when I get rushed through a meal, with no real gap between courses. One one occasion recently I was in and out of a high-end seafood restaurant in 45 minutes after spending $150. The couple at the next table, who arrived when I did, were just finishing their appetizers as I was putting on my coat...

Number 32 gave me a chuckle:

"32. Never touch a customer. No excuses. Do not do it. Do not brush them, move them, wipe them or dust them."

Just trying to imagine under what circumstance a waiter might find themselves wishing to "dust" a customer!!

[Proposed] 32(b). Never lean on a customer's wheelchair while taking the order. (Note: this actually happened at a "white tabel cloth" establishment in midtown NYC. One of my associates was in the wheel chair. The server was kind of a loon to begin with and gorked everybody out with lots of wacky behavior :( )

Just trying to imagine under what circumstance a waiter might find themselves wishing to "dust" a customer!!

Well - I've been to some places where service was so slow that a good dusting would have been in order when the meal arrived. :D

27. For red wine, ask if the guests want to pour their own or prefer the waiter to pour.

30. Never let the wine bottle touch the glass into which you are pouring. No one wants to drink the dust or dirt from the bottle.

I have NEVER been asked if I would prefer to pour my own wine, and can't figure out for the life of me why this would be an issue with red wine. The server should be trained to know the proper amount to pour in the glass.

While I agree that the bottle shouldn't touch the glass, it has nothing to do with dust and dirt - isn't the server supposed to CLEAN the bottle before bringing to the table?

Ok I tried to insert some comments from the other perspective without getting totally snarky... but as a one-time (long time) waiter and bartender - and a good one - there are plenty of situations that require the guest/customer to interact with a certain level of politeness, as well. Many of this gentleman's points are, in fact, good 'service points'... others are highly subjective and dynamic to the situation... and others 'pet peeves'. There are LOTs of d-bag waiters out there (in fact I quit one restaurant where the waiters were collectively classless), but there are a lot of d-bag customers as well.

1. Do not let anyone enter the restaurant without a warm greeting.
When you receive a warm (and genuine) greeting from me, return it.

2. Do not make a singleton feel bad. Do not say, “Are you waiting for someone?” Ask for a reservation. Ask if he or she would like to sit at the bar.
If you are dining alone, do not request my 4-top in the front window or other large table.

3. Never refuse to seat three guests because a fourth has not yet arrived.
Show up on time; if you are more than a few minutes late, call; maybe even be empathetic when you arrive.

4. If a table is not ready within a reasonable length of time, offer a free drink and/or amuse-bouche. The guests may be tired and hungry and thirsty, and they did everything right.
Understand that in most cases the staff is working as quickly as possible to get you a table… unless you are clearly being ignored or otherwise treated rudely please continue to act and behave with a level of decorum similar to what you expect.

5. Tables should be level without anyone asking. Fix it before guests are seated.
Please feel free to ask if the table is not, through some oversight, level. The staff should be happy to fix it for you. I would.

6. Do not lead the witness with, “Bottled water or just tap?” Both are fine. Remain neutral.
Please realize that not all restaurant owners are as tactful as Mr. Buschel; many times, I am MADE to say certain things and offer certain things.

7. Do not announce your name. No jokes, no flirting, no cuteness.
I am tempted to say touché, but I would prefer to adapt my style to your attitude and needs. Expect me to follow your lead. I will modify my approach significantly when working for a table of businessmen vs. a family vs. a table of women out for a social evening.

8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.
Realize that I may have 15+ other people to take care of and that sometimes timing windows can be very small; if I DO have to interrupt, expect me to say excuse me and to be efficient. Example: checking in shortly after a course has been dropped, particularly main course and there is an involved discussion or one person talking indefinitely (this is particularly common with business dinners); I have to make sure the food is satisfactory… I will stand for a few seconds to wait for pause, then say “I’m sorry to interrupt you but I do want to make sure everything is ok/steaks are done the way you like them? Thank you.” If you DON’T allow for that interruption, perhaps it is your guest/client who has the overcooked filet. MY feelings are somewhat irrelevant but your guests' are not.

9. Do not recite the specials too fast or robotically or dramatically. It is not a soliloquy. This is not an audition.
It is also not a cooking show or class. I may have only seen the specials one time. Expect that I can answer basics but be realistic that I may need to follow up on questions that are highly idiosyncratic.

10. Do not inject your personal favorites when explaining the specials.
Unless asked… there are a stunning number of people who cannot seem to choose as much as a salad without asking for my opinion.

11. Do not hustle the lobsters. That is, do not say, “We only have two lobsters left.” Even if there are only two lobsters left.
Do realize that we run out of things and that information is not always promptly related to the floor staff.

12. Do not touch the rim of a water glass. Or any other glass.
Do not lift the water glass for me to pour water into it; a moving target is far more difficult to hit without spilling.

13. Handle wine glasses by their stems and silverware by the handles.
There is no need to hand me your glass or silverware or anything else that is dirty. I will pick it up from the table.

14. When you ask, “How’s everything?” or “How was the meal?” listen to the answer and fix whatever is not right.
Be honest with me; most problems can be fixed if they are talked about and brought to my attention. I cannot read minds.

15. Never say “I don’t know” to any question without following with, “I’ll find out.”
Realize that this is also not “stump the waiter.” With all the food shows on TV people seem to think that sneering and disdaining tones are appropriate, even when asking the most esoteric questions. Perhaps your friends are the type who like your posturing?

16. If someone requests more sauce or gravy or cheese, bring a side dish of same. No pouring. Let them help themselves.
Please recognize that on special request number 13 I may let you know (with subtlety and tact, of course) that this is, in fact, a restaurant and that there may be 100+ other customers we are trying to accommodate simultaneous to meeting your every whim.

17. Do not take an empty plate from one guest while others are still eating the same course. Wait, wait, wait.
Do not stack the plates when you are finished. Your dining companions may think you have no manners.

18. Know before approaching a table who has ordered what. Do not ask, “Who’s having the shrimp?”
Please don’t reach for the plate; it may be hot or otherwise create a moving target that could cause a spill.

19. Offer guests butter and/or olive oil with their bread.
If it is not the practice of the restaurant already, I would be happy to warm the bread for you; however, simply because it is served room temperature does not mean I or the restaurant made a mistake.

20. Never refuse to substitute one vegetable for another.
Realizing, however, that we may not julienne your carrots in perfect ¼” strips, and then toss with a specific blend of 7 different seasonings just to meet your special request.

21. Never serve anything that looks creepy or runny or wrong.
Realize that I do not “taste test” each order (fortunately!); it is quite possible I did not realize something was amiss.

22. If someone is unsure about a wine choice, help him. That might mean sending someone else to the table or offering a taste or two.
Know the difference between being discerning and a wine snob. Nobody likes a wine snob. Nobody. Even your wife rolls her eyes behind your back (

23. If someone likes a wine, steam the label off the bottle and give it to the guest with the bill. It has the year, the vintner, the importer, etc.
If I do this, thank me.

24. Never use the same glass for a second drink.
Unless asked. Not uncommon for people to request “same glass.”

25. Make sure the glasses are clean. Inspect them before placing them on the table.
A fingerprint on a glass is not the same as a rat in the bread basket. I’ll be happy to replace a dirty glass but if this has ruined your entire dinner there is probably not a lot I can do to fix your life.

8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.
Realize that I may have 15+ other people to take care of and that sometimes timing windows can be very small; if I DO have to interrupt, expect me to say excuse me and to be efficient.

I'm a former waiter in a fine-dining hotel F&B situation from long ago. That being said, I've always been peeved by servers asking, "Is everything okay?" when I've just taken a bite and my mouth is full. Yeah, you've got lots of covers, but why time your check-in to when I can't talk? I've chided offending servers by referring to their "waiter training" :p but it still is rather uncomfortable for the guest.

You knew it was coming! Here are #51-#100, courtesy of the NYTimes this morning:

http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/11/05/one-hundred-things-restaurant-staffers-should-never-do-part-2/

Oh, dear. Especially #93:

93. Do not play brass — no brassy Broadway songs, brass bands, marching bands, or big bands that feature brass, except a muted flugelhorn.

Muted Flugelhorn?! This takes micro-management to a whole new level.

"74. Let the guests know the restaurant is out of something before the guests read the menu and order the missing dish." Even more important: If the restaurant is out of one component of a dish and it will be missing or substituted, let the diner know at the time of ordering.

A few years ago my then partner (now spouse) and I were at an Italian restaurant and I ordered a dish containing broccoli. I adore broccoli--it closed the sale. When the dish arrived with something else substituted, I objected. It would have been a major inconvenience if they'd offered to let me order something else, but they neither offered that nor were willing to do that (without charging for the misdescribed dish) on my request. A planned romantic meal was ruined. I tipped a penny and I've never been back.

A few years ago my then partner (now spouse) and I were at an Italian restaurant and I ordered a dish containing broccoli. I adore broccoli--it closed the sale. When the dish arrived with something else substituted, I objected. It would have been a major inconvenience if they'd offered to let me order something else, but they neither offered that nor were willing to do that (without charging for the misdescribed dish) on my request. A planned romantic meal was ruined. I tipped a penny and I've never been back.
Wait - let me get this straight: they substituted one of the ingredients without telling you and then refused to replace the dish unless you paid for it along with the new dish?

Did you call a manager?

Wait - let me get this straight: they substituted one of the ingredients without telling you and then refused to replace the dish unless you paid for it along with the new dish?
Yep.
Did you call a manager?
Yep. He supported his waiter. I guess neither of them believed that broccoli could be worth refusing a dish over.

I wrote the owner a letter. I got no reply. As I said, I've never been back.

53. Do not let guests double-order unintentionally; remind the guest who orders ratatouille that zucchini comes with the entree.

I totally disagree with this one. I think it crosses into the realm of being judgmental about what the diner wants. If the ingredients are listed on the menu, and I double-order zucchini, I don't want the waiter suggesting to me that I made a poor choice. Maybe I just adore zucchini.

I totally disagree with this one. I think it crosses into the realm of being judgmental about what the diner wants. If the ingredients are listed on the menu, and I double-order zucchini, I don't want the waiter suggesting to me that I made a poor choice. Maybe I just adore zucchini.
I think there are discreet ways to handle this without the waiter in any way suggesting that you've made a poor choice.

For instance, any tactful person would say something like "I just want to make sure you're aware that these dishes actually give you two starters. Some people have ordered this combination before and were surprised about this."

If anyone is offended after hearing something like that, then I'd say the problem is with them and not the waitstaff. ;)

64. Specials, spoken and printed, should always have prices.



yes,yes,yes. It's nice to have all the information before hand. I would hate to be surprised when the bill comes that the special is twice the amount of the regular menu items.

Excellent list, agree with every single one - and certainly not only for high-end establishments as someone else suggested. Pretty basic stuff, really.

Do not return to the guest anything that falls on the floor — be it napkin,

Are there restaurants that replace every napkin that falls off a lap to the floor? I've never seen one do that.

Besides knowing the wait staff's name, I completly disagree that any comment about something being a good choice or their favorite implies that everything else is a bad choice.

I really don't want to eat in this nutcase's restaurant, he would be better off opening a order at the window, and pick up at the next window place so he doesn't have to worry about any of his staff having a personality.

I think there are discreet ways to handle this without the waiter in any way suggesting that you've made a poor choice.

For instance, any tactful person would say something like "I just want to make sure you're aware that these dishes actually give you two starters. Some people have ordered this combination before and were surprised about this."

If anyone is offended after hearing something like that, then I'd say the problem is with them and not the waitstaff. ;)

I don't disagree with that at all, especially if the menu organization is unusual -- so that I might not realize I'm duplicating in my order.

But the example the list gave seemed to suggest that if I order a marinated zucchini appetizer together with a ratatouille main, the server should remind me that both of them contain zucchini. If the ingredients are listed on the menu (as they should be) I'm not sure comment is appropriate -- I just think that it would come across as an implied criticism of the lack of variety in my dinner.

I completly disagree that any comment about something being a good choice or their favorite implies that everything else is a bad choice.


I agree with you. I don't think it's always appropriate to say "good choice" (after all, if you say it every time it loses all meaning). But sometimes you can tell a diner is struggling with deciding what to order, maybe vacillating between two choices -- when that happens to me, a smile from the server along with a "great choice, that special is delicious" can put my doubts to rest and let me enjoy my meal.

I do sometimes ask my server for advice and I always appreciate honest responses, even if it could be interpreted as criticism of one of the choices. When I want help choosing and I get "everything on the menu is great" or "they are both very popular" type responses I find that frustating.

#14-- a waiter asking how is everything?? and hovering by, while clearly all at the table are eating, chewing, swolling etc-- causing diners to attempt to reply, before he will leave.

"32. Never touch a customer. No excuses. Do not do it. Do not brush them, move them, wipe them or dust them."

An exception is needed for this. I have a close friend who is blind, and we sometimes go to restaurants for dinner. It happens very often that the waiter will say to me "What does HE want to order?" instead of asking my friend, because he can't get my friend's attention by making eye contact which is how he commonly gets attention, and he is reluctant to touch my friend to get his attention.

My friend and I think the right course of action is for the waiter to lightly tap my friend on the shoulder and say "Sir, what would you like?"

Although I understand the waiter's discomfort, I invariably say politely "I don't know what he wants; please ask him".

Well - I've been to some places where service was so slow that a good dusting would have been in order when the meal arrived. :D

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

To number 55, which is "Do not serve an amuse-bouche without detailing the ingredients. Allergies are a serious matter; peanut oil can kill. (This would also be a good time to ask if anyone has any allergies.)", I would add: do not bring out the bread-basket to a guest who has just spent the last ten minutes asking about what is gluten-free on your menu (has happened to me).

#78 sure resonates. I'd better not be "working on" my meal, unless the restaurant plans on paying me for my time/labor!

57. Bring the pepper mill with the appetizer. Do not make people wait or beg for a condiment.

I could do without the attack of the 50' pepper mill when I go out to dine.

85. Never bring a check until someone asks for it. Then give it to the person who asked for it.

I dislike being hustled out of a restaurant with the check, I dislike waiting for the check moreso. A decent waiter should be attentive enough to his table to politely ask at some point.

I could do without the attack of the 50' pepper mill when I go out to dine.
Agreed -this is a trend I do not understand. How am I supposed to know if my food needs pepper unless I taste it first? And why do only get pepper once at the beginning of the meal? And what is up with the gigantic pepper mills?

So weird...

Do not get too familiar, like asking, "Hiya all tonight - how's everyone doing?"

Do not assume any relationship between diners and do not let on that you know one or more of the diners, like saying, "Hello, Mr. A, nice to see you and the Mrs. again."

If you are dining alone, do not request my 4-top in the front window or other large table.

Customers have EVERY RIGHT to request a large booth or table. I have requested a 6-8 seater booth for just me and my husband even. You have more room to put condiments, drinks, bread, etc.

I have also dined alone and asked for a 4-seater booth, because a 2 seater booth is really small in my opinion. I am not fat or even overweight even, I just like to stretch and I have problems in confined places such as when I am driving or in a movie theatre that I have almost no room to crack my knee. I have joint issue at times that it feels stiff unless I crack it and I don't like a small table or booth.

I hate when you have 4 people at a table and you have to move the advertisements in the middle of the table to have enough room for water glasses, alcoholic drinks, bread, condiments, etc.

YOU are only thinking of YOU and YOUR TIP. Sorry that maybe you could have had made more money possibly on a larger party, but customers have rights to feel comfortable and sit where they please.

Do not stack the plates when you are finished. Your dining companions may think you have no manners.

Stacking plates get it out of OUR WAY, so that is WHAT WE as customers are concerned about. We don't want that dirty plate right in front of us and especially, because we want to move it before we are served the next course or get the check.

I stack dishes all the time to get them out of my way.

21. Never serve anything that looks creepy or runny or wrong.Realize that I do not “taste test” each order (fortunately!); it is quite possible I did not realize something was amiss.

Realize that the original person that wrote this said "LOOKS", so no one is saying that you should taste test anything.

Customers have EVERY RIGHT to request a large booth or table. I have requested a 6-8 seater booth for just me and my husband even. You have more room to put condiments, drinks, bread, etc.
With respect, I completely disagree with you. Customers may have "EVERY RIGHT" to request a 6-8 seat booth for a party of two, but the restaurant has every right to say no (and unless it's an exceptionally slow night, any decent hostess/manager would do). When a party of two is taking up a space designed for a party of eight, there are six seats that are going wasted. That is significant potential revenue for many places, and I'm sure that the restaurant won't look too kindly upon passing it up just because one of their customers feels like they want a little bit more room.

I hate when you have 4 people at a table and you have to move the advertisements in the middle of the table to have enough room for water glasses, alcoholic drinks, bread, condiments, etc.
The places I go (and I daresay, the place in the original article) tend not to have advertisements standing up in the middle of the table. YMMV.

YOU are only thinking of YOU and YOUR TIP.
Would you not say the same about you and your space? Just a question.

Sorry that maybe you could have had made more money possibly on a larger party, but customers have rights to feel comfortable and sit where they please.
Really? Where are these rights defined? Is this law somewhere?

I'm a former waiter in a fine-dining hotel F&B situation from long ago. That being said, I've always been peeved by servers asking, "Is everything okay?" when I've just taken a bite and my mouth is full. Yeah, you've got lots of covers, but why time your check-in to when I can't talk? I've chided offending servers by referring to their "waiter training" :p but it still is rather uncomfortable for the guest.

Agree 100% with this. Timing of waitstaff interventions is one of the most frequent sins I encounter.

<<8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.>> is part of this too. The number of times I have been cut off just before the crucial punch-line of a story or joke..... and in some cases have lost a gig because of it. Grrrrrrrr! :mad: Just don't do it. Look before opening mouth. You know you can do it. An extra 10 or 15 seconds won't hurt you. Wait for the table to relax or roar with laughter and then interject, not before.

Agree 100% with this. Timing of waitstaff interventions is one of the most frequent sins I encounter.

<<8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.>> is part of this too. The number of times I have been cut off just before the crucial punch-line of a story or joke..... and in some cases have lost a gig because of it. Grrrrrrrr! :mad: Just don't do it. Look before opening mouth. You know you can do it. An extra 10 or 15 seconds won't hurt you. Wait for the table to relax or roar with laughter and then interject, not before.

That's my main point, too. It is especially egregious in the USA. In Europe, wait staff is often schooled in gastronomy and all these 100 rules are just the crude basis. In a really good restaurant in Europe nothing like the stuff on the list will happen and if it happens you could be sure I'd notice it and make a remark.

Asking how everything is when the person asked has their mouthful is plain impolite. Cutting off their speech is so rude it would deserve a whipping. The waiter is called a waiter because he WAITS. The next time I'm asked if everything is alright: I will tell them: It was until you asked me while I was chewing or talking.

It is also not important for the waiter to ask if everything tastes good or is to the guests satisfaction until the end of the dinner. It is condescending of the waiter to presume I would not take care of my guests myself. It is my job to ask my guests. I will then relay it to the waiter who will let the waiter or maitre d' know and rectify anything that might occur. If there is a good moment when no one is interrupted and the waiter is doing some form of service at the table anyway, i.e. he doesn't come just to ask, then it will be ok to ask: Is everything to your liking?

If the waiter says we have to accommodate 100 other guests and thus can't wait on you correctly or can't give you the service that satisfies you, then that says something about the manners of the waiter and the management of the restaurant.

Of course, the guests should be realistic in their expectations. When I go to a simple place I won't expect that much. Still the no interruption rule stands. When I go to a more expensive place that prides itself for its food and service I take them seriously and let them know if something is not up to snuff.

If it's a high class place, there should be some discretion with names. I really don't care that the waiters name is Mike or Rachel. If I go there often, I will take care as a guest to remember that Jacques gave me excellent service and I will determine the level of engagement that takes place.

In a more casual place, I sometimes enjoy it but see it as an American cowboy way of doing things. :)

Another thing is that waiters shouldn't take criticism of the restaurant personal.

Yesterday night I had a wonderful dinner in one of the best Italian restaurants of Berlin. We were served by the chief sommelier. Usually these guys are the best. He wasn't that great. I wanted to start the dinner with an aperitif and ordered a Martini Bianco. It is a sweet vermouth; very typical in Italy. Not super high class but not low class, either. He said we don't have that? As I express my amazement, he points to the menu and points out that this is an Enoteca (a restaurant specializing in Italian wine). He delivered it in such a way as if I was a barbarian for ordering a Martini Bianco or didn't know what an Enoteca was, where in fact my Italian was probably better than his. I made it clear that this was conceptually a strange decision because they did offer Sherry (from Spain), Port (from Portugal), and Whisky and Vodka, non from Italy and not even made of grapes. He was a bit of a ..... for the the rest of the evening to the point where I almost called the owner. Instead I decided to draw him into a conversation about a particular Italian wine (which he didn't know) and to write down the wine for him on my business card so he can look it up. His attitude changed after that. If the food wasn't so delicious there and I wasn't particularly interested in coming back, his boss would have heard of me for the response he gave us when we waited 30 minutes between the starter and the entree.

This restaurant did bring a feedback card with the bill which is highly unusual in Germany. We did fill it out, too.

Till

With respect, I completely disagree with you. Customers may have "EVERY RIGHT" to request a 6-8 seat booth for a party of two, but the restaurant has every right to say no (and unless it's an exceptionally slow night, any decent hostess/manager would do). When a party of two is taking up a space designed for a party of eight, there are six seats that are going wasted. That is significant potential revenue for many places, and I'm sure that the restaurant won't look too kindly upon passing it up just because one of their customers feels like they want a little bit more room.

I understand that, but we have NEVER been turned down, LOTS of times at Chili's and Outback. Also, even at a fine dining restaurant, requested a 4-seater booth for 2 and got it with NO PROBLEM. I have NEVER been turned down, because we are willing to wait if it's not available. Also, with call ahead seating, it makes it easier as well, especially at Outback.

If the restaurant manager would say no, they lose our business. We will just go somewhere else then, but NO restaurant has refused, EVER!! Even during busy times. I call ahead at the places that have call ahead seating. If we are willing to wait the time it takes to get the certain spot we want, we wait. We won't wait an hour now-a-days, but we have before in the past.

The places I go (and I daresay, the place in the original article) tend not to have advertisements standing up in the middle of the table. YMMV.

Even with moving it, still didn't have a whole lot of room with water glasses(it's a fine dining restaurant, so they automatically bring you that whether you order it or not), wine glasses, wine bottle, appetizer plates, appetizer, bread, salt n' pepper shakers, cloth napkin with utensils, and I usually order a soft drink, because I don't want much water as well as a bar drink. So with all of that, the table my husband, me, and his grandparents were at didn't have much room to spare.

Would you not say the same about you and your space? Just a question.

I have a right to since we are PAYING for the SERVICE and FOOD. If the service and food was for free, then I can see the managers calling all the shots, but if the customer is paying for their food and service, shouldn't they get to call the shots?

The server's tip is not our concern if our server isn't concerned with our comfort and happiness. You have to care about our dining experience in order for us to care about your money when it's tip time. Caring is a 2-way street. It's not all about you. You want a good tip at the end, quit thinking about what people could have been there to tip you and do a good job instead. You might just get some extra money at times as we have done before to the servers that treat us very well.

Really? Where are these rights defined? Is this law somewhere?

It's a free country and if I want to request a certain table or booth, I can. I can be turned down and they have every right to refuse to serve me, but I can at least TRY to get what I want.

Agreed -this is a trend I do not understand. How am I supposed to know if my food needs pepper unless I taste it first? And why do only get pepper once at the beginning of the meal? And what is up with the gigantic pepper mills?

So weird...
And what does the appearance of the Giant Pepper Mill say about the ground pepper that is in the pepper shaker? Does this restaurant use an inferior grade of pepper in the pepper shakers?

And what does the appearance of the Giant Pepper Mill say about the ground pepper that is in the pepper shaker? Does this restaurant use an inferior grade of pepper in the pepper shakers?
I wouldn't assume it's an inferior grade--but like coffee, the pre-ground stuff goes stale faster. It may be a subtle difference, but the fresh-ground stuff will have a stronger, fresher taste.

And what does the appearance of the Giant Pepper Mill say about the ground pepper that is in the pepper shaker? Does this restaurant use an inferior grade of pepper in the pepper shakers?
I don't know if there's an inferior grade. What I react to is (a) the freakishly large pepper mill. Why? and (b) the fact that you can only get pepper once, at the beginning of the meal.

I don't know if there's an inferior grade. What I react to is (a) the freakishly large pepper mill. Why? and (b) the fact that you can only get pepper once, at the beginning of the meal.

And at many places, the GIANT PEPPER MILL only comes out for the salad. I do not want any pepper on my salad, but I will want plenty on my entree.

I've always assumed the pepper grinders were oversized to prevent them being pocketed.

And what does the appearance of the Giant Pepper Mill say about the ground pepper that is in the pepper shaker? Does this restaurant use an inferior grade of pepper in the pepper shakers?
I wouldn't assume it's an inferior grade--but like coffee, the pre-ground stuff goes stale faster. It may be a subtle difference, but the fresh-ground stuff will have a stronger, fresher taste.

The question is of course if you have to fill the giant grinder with 17 years' worth
of pepper, what's the point of using anything good?

I've always assumed the pepper grinders were oversized to prevent them being pocketed.
That actually makes good sense. As someone who would never think of stealing from a restaurant, that hadn't even crossed my mind - but I can now see how it would be an issue. I guess the saddest thing is that, because a small distinct (and sick) minority steals pepper mills from restaurants, the rest of us have to flag down our waiter every time we want a little pepper. Kinda sad.

There is a size between seven foot long need a step ladder to use and salt shaker size that will not be easily concealed, and can be left and picked up at the table (think ketchup bottle size). To me that would be the happy medium for a pepper mill. I want it on the table, so I can add it as I see fit. Do I have a clue how much I want in the bisque without tasting it first or knowing how strong the pepper is? Of course not.

I also think there are people who prefer fresh ground, and those who prefer the preground stuff. I hate the preground stuff. It has little pepper flavor at all. I know people who find the fresh stuff way too strong.

I've always assumed the pepper grinders were oversized to prevent them being pocketed.

I can visualize it now. Pepper grinders attached to the table like the pens at the bank.

I don't know if there's an inferior grade. What I react to is (a) the freakishly large pepper mill. Why? and (b) the fact that you can only get pepper once, at the beginning of the meal.

For all those whose pet hate in a restaurant is the GIANT PEPPER GRINDER:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCFRbcSmvCc

There is a size between seven foot long need a step ladder to use and salt shaker size that will not be easily concealed, and can be left and picked up at the table (think ketchup bottle size). To me that would be the happy medium for a pepper mill.

Have you noticed the size of this year's purses? ;)

It doesn't matter if the server tells me their name, because I'm going to forget it the minute he/she says it. I just don't log that information into memory. It's just pointless for them to bother.