Travelchurner

Was there really 3k min post rule, or is that a joke?

AKCuisine

I *WISH* that some of those new posters would bother to *READ* some of the existing threads. Or take the time to *SEARCH* for an answer to their question before asking something for the umpteenth time. Often, the question has already been answered countless times.

Even worse is when they're starting a brand *NEW* thread to ask an inane or repetative question ... SMH ...

Do your research, people!

ctporter

a joke

edgewood49

kinda like "NW Lobsters"

HGHUA

On AS 753 right now. Realized my data only t-mobile number will work for a free hour of wifi! Sweet. It was that free 200mb for life thing they did a while ago. I don't even use it anymore but can't be bothered to cancel it.. haha

maradori

If it makes you feel better, the Air Canada forum used to be my home and this kind of stuff is worse over there (compound to the fact that the airline and the frequent flyer program are two separate companies ....)

+1 my $3/mon pay as you go works too. Best $3/mon ever

danielonn

Well folks I just paid my $450 to join the Bored Room. As I enter the room I smell the soups and weep as the matron has not filled up the soups. Then I sit down and remember that I can get a few drinks while waiting.

In the background I hear some Pacific Northwest Artist playing over the Muzak ah its Kenny G. Well as I fall into this deep trance with Songbird, Taking You Home and then The Theme From St. Elmo's Fire comes on(David Foster's Instrumental Version). Then the music switches to instrumental Soft Rock Sock Throwing Songs.

And then Roxette Come and Join the Joyride comes on and I start to dance. The Club has now turned into a NightClub with some good hits.

As I eat plates of cheese, salad, more soup and cookies its time to give the Espresso Machine a good workout.

I go past the 3 Drink Complimentary Adult Beverages limit as I bring up some Netflix and then my cellphone rings reminding me I'm about to board the 737-900 in First Class.

But the flight is delayed. So then I strike a conversation with this random Seattlite who works for Starbucks. Gosh I recognize him. Its Howard Schultz on one side and Kenny G on the other side and me in the middle. So we talk about how Alska should be serving Caf Cielo, Sumatra, Italian Roast insttead of their tired Pikes Peak. Even Howard agrees Pikes Peak is nowhere as good as Starbuk's Silowese Blend.

We have a little contest to see who can make the most drinks in the shortest amount of time. Howard shows me how to get into the Administrator Mode and give the machine strings of commands. So we play around with it. Then the Lounge Matron is perplexed perhaps she served one too many Gin and Tonics that she forgets how to operate this machine.

You hear a loud bang. Oh no the entire barrel of soup fell upside down. Wow now the lounge begins to smell of Chicken Curry Soup, Ay yi yi the Matron says just as about she is to load the chips. Chaos just chaos.

So I ask the matron for Alaska to beef up their catering on my overnight redeye in First to Dallas. The Agent calls over to Catering and they figure out that my "Joyride" is ready with better catering.

I figure that I will be one if not the only passenger to imbibe in the drinks and gourmand the food. We shall see what can be accomplished in 3 hours.

Wow I hear a Seattle Seahawk coming through the club. We wait for a brief second. Phew it was only the Hawk Agent walking me to the flight.

Round two Where is the Snack Mix(Hawaiian version)? Here ya go Honey as the Matron hands me a bag with at least 20 of those delicious packs.

I get out of the lounge as fast as Windows 10 Fast Boot. And get to the gate which has some Klondike Ice Cream Bars. If I have one too many the plane may need some deicing but not like the incident at SJC.

On to the home of the Cowboys. Rid'er up into the sky Captain. Yee Haw I'm 30, 000 feet above now I know what Heaven really is. Let me enter into the Euphoria with the DigiPlayer some Gin to get us started. The flight attendant stops the brief anesthesia to see if I will be partaking in the repast. Of course and if there is more than one leftover I'll take it.

Miles Vacation Prestige(MVP) is our pursuer who is giving me refills of this meditative solution from a local Seattle Distillery, I am distilled for a good 20 minutes before the offer of a Nightcap. Sure I'll have a separate Coffee and a Doube Cognac and the lull of the lullaby engines along with a movie puts me into Shower Mode for our Dazed Fatigued Wary arrival.

Its a Party onboard Mount Adams and I'm buzzed like the Bering Strait. Gotta love the wee hour Shindig.

As we begin our descent I ask the Flight Attendant for an Irish Coffee with Whiskey. And now I call out Hold left of Yankee to Whiskey 10,000 feet to Zulu. Then I give the Land Proximity Warning in the Microsoft Voice 50,40,30,20,10 LAND.

We taxi to the gate with the dark planes overnighting at 5:08 AM. I look forward to the AMEX Lounge for a Shower with Power and some Breakfast for Champions. If only Alska had a Boredroom I could turn myself into a Pancakedess(Not a Stewardess) or a Pancakawrd(Not a Steward) and flip or flop the pancakes. Nah that will wait.

So as I step off the flight I make a plight to fly First Class again. Till next time I hope you will count the time without a crime.

Alaska just got me to Dallas a heckuva long way from the cold Eskimo state where its Ukiuq and its Cold Outside.

"She says hello you fool I love you come and join the Joyride" So ends Ambien Sanity Flight 660 from Microsoft to American Territory.

How did you enjoy this Trip Report for a Flight I haven't even taken. A Preemptive Trip Report with that twist of lime.

BOB W

danielonn,

Maryjane is legal in Alaska, but whatever you are trippin' on most certainly is not!!

Nice fantasy read^^

edgewood49

What he forgot was the 5 star dining and service on his "flight to fantasy" much like current day service fantasy

Eastbay1K

It would be just find if they would read and search, as opposed to READ and SEARCH. Meanwhile, the FT search function, as being one of the world's foremost and excellent software developments since the internet's creation, can lead one to actually READ and SEARCH (as well as read and search) and come up with an unsatisfactory result.

Finally, as we welcome our new VX brothers and sisters, we should all be a little patient. "Our" capable AS crew (can't say the M word) will surely redirect the possibly "repetative" [sic] new posts to a better, existing home.

Seat 2A

That was quite the enjoyable read, danielonn. We can only hope that the real thing is anywhere near as entertaining. Additionally, should you once again exceed your alcohol limit at the Alaska Lounge and then imbibe similarly on your flights, might I suggest you arrange for wheelchair assistance when you reach Dallas? Happy Contrails ============= ->

danielonn

Thanks for the comments. I am glad you liked the fantasy story and I do hope my upcoming trip is filled with excitement perhaps the rain will keep me grounded in Seattle lol.

makfan

It is "souring" because AS was forced to give up some codeshare to acquire VX. It will suck if they take away reciprocal lounge access. Is AS dropping MFR-LAX or will there be two aircraft a day (one AA, one AS) instead of one now?

edgewood49

Hate to lose AA lounge access, BR is a joke these days

rustykettel

AS MFR-LAX is still in the schedule, so two. That is a good question though. Can that market support both?